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My ex is making my life hell.


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I broke up with my girlfriend over 18months ago, ive not seen anyone since. During the 18 months she made my families, one of my collegues and my life hell until I involved the police and she was cautioned in January.

 

I'm quite good friends with a female collegue (mentioned above), and we've been doing stuff together - just as friends. Though I'm kinda developing a crush on her and I thought she was on me.

 

Last week I'd looked at her computer for her and we had a takeaway meal, there was a knock on the door and it was my ex. She never knew where my collegue lived prior to this, but had seen my car parked in the street and had been knocking doors trying to find me.

 

My collegue/friend (understandably) was very annoyed and upset (as was I) she is worried that she'll recieve hate mail to her house rather than work or my ex might hurt her dog.

I went to police again and there nothing that they can do.

I bought a CCTV camera for her and fitted it and bought a big bunch of flowers (yellow&red roses) as an apology + gave her a birthday card and pressie (it her birthday soon) and that last seen of her for just under a week.

 

She said she wants to stay friends but doesnt know if she wants to do stuff anymore. I dont know what to do now, i've given her space this week, which has been difficult; as her family is visiting from canada for 4weeks. I txt yesterday to say hope she ok and enjoying hols. and got reply today, without its usual 'x' at the end.

 

1stly I'm not 100% sure she liked me as more than a friend anyway.

 

2ndly - I dont know what to do know, I dont want to crowd her and especially as her family here. But really like to see and talk with her. I've replied to her text.

Should I just wait now for however long it takes for her to come back into contact with me?

 

Its her birthday soon and had been planning to drop some not to subtle hints after her b'day that I really like her (there is a age difference, shes older than me). I just enjoy been with her as she always makes me smile and makes me feel happy.

 

Another collegue said if it had happended to her then she'd just tell me that she didnt need this in her life and not bother again.

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What if you ask to take her out for her birthday, somewhere maybe a little outside of the general area, and even offer to use alternate transportation (like her car or public transportation, as opposed to your car)...tell her it's not really that much trouble to hang out with you (ha ha) you just want to give her a tense-free, fun, relaxing birthday...and if you go to her house in the future, you could always use other transportation then too...this would be no trouble for your friend, as you'd be the one going out of way to make time with her worry-free. Now that your Ex knows where she lives though, she might be crazy enough to knock on her door even without your car being out front. But in this case, you'd think your friend could call her on harrassment?....

 

If your friend feels she's in potential danger, though, due to your unstable Ex, it'll be hard to convince her otherwise...but you should continue to do whatever you can to get a restraining order on this chick...she's disrupting your life that isn't right.

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