[MissJ]

What does that mean exactly???? They guy I have been seeing for 10 soon to be 11 years has just decided that we should take a break and work on becoming better friends. Is that just a nice way to say "I dont want to be with you anymore????

He just recently joined the reserves and before he had left we had a rocky relationship. Now that hes home, everything seemed to go pretty well. Our relationship had finally gotten to where it should have been years ago.
I thought he wanted a break because of someone else... He assured me it wasnt and that I was who he wanted to Marry have kids with, etc. He just wanted us to be the way we were after we had been apart for some time. Although a few days later I heard a message from a "new" girl just calling to say hello. He says, and she says, they are just friends, that met at work. Do i have suspicion to believe that hes seeing her and after 10 years would just drop me like that for another woman??

Does taking a break mean its over and that he wants to be with her??? Or is he genuinely trying to get some space so we can really be together?? Im so confused and have no Idea what to do.... I have been just not calling and he called to say Hi and see how I was... Why??? because he cares or just feels guilty for Dumping me after all this time???? Please help, I could use some advise.... ANYTHING PLEASE

[superconductor]

Originally Posted by MissJ

Is that just a nice way to say "I dont want to be with you anymore????

Yup

Originally Posted by MissJ

Does taking a break mean its over...

Yup

Originally Posted by MissJ

...he called to say Hi and see how I was... Why??? because he cares or just feels guilty for Dumping me after all this time????

Both, probably.

Sorry, but in relationship-speak, "taking a break" is short for "I don't want to be with you anymore but I haven't got the courage to tell you to your face."

[LucreziaBorgia]

A break is like going into work on your day off. You are still employed there, but you don't have to follow any work rules or anything like that. You know you can go back the next time you have to work but until then, you are free to do as you like. Same with a break in a relationship. You are free to do what you like, talk to whom you like - knowing that the relationship is right there on the back burner for when you want to go back into it.

It sounds like your boyfriend has an interest in someone else, but not enough of one to completely ditch your relationship entirely. It could be that they are not seeing one another, but the thought has crossed their mind - hence the break and not the breakup. If things do work out and a relationship develops between the two, you are likely to hear the breakup talk.

Why did he call? To make sure you are ok and still there for when/if things don't work out between him and this new girl.

Honestly, the best thing to do when someone offers you a break is to hand them a breakup followed by some solid 'no contact'. A break is rarely, if ever a positive thing.

[konfused]

I agree with Lucrezia. It's probably best to make a decision and stick to it. If he wanted to work things out he would have. Welcome to crazy time.