Been dating a girl for almost a year. However....there is one huge problem. She either is bi-polar or has multiple personalies. I like her because we have so much fun together and share many laughs. We enjoy exploring, road trips, hiking etc. We have lots of conversation and the best sex ever. We've talked many times about possible marraige and children. My "soulmate" is who my girlfriend is about 60% of the time...
Usually during a good day, we'll be out having a good time and literally in an instant, I can tell by the look in her face that she becomes someone else. In a moment's notice, she becomes empty with no emotion and feeling or literally a raging lunatic. She is verbally abusive, swears, lies, makes threats to break up, she starts drinking (and driving) along with using cocaine and weed (she denies doing any of that when she's "normal"). Sometimes she won't speak to me for days. She also starts doing things like looking through my cell phone and accusing me of things. This will last for 1-2 weeks.
Out of no where, she is back to herself again. She's happy go lucky and fun to be around. The drug use and abuse toward me completely stop. I tell her how she had treated me, and she usually will say sorry, but I don't think she even grasps how scary she gets. It's like the good and bad side of her don't know each other.
She doesn't refer to herself by two names or anything...but I don't know if that's nessesary for multiple personality.
I'm just overwhelmed. I love her to death, but sometimes I'm even afraid for my safety when her "switch" goes off. I want to stay with her because I know she can't help it. I don't think this is her fault at all....but sometimes I'm just so lost. I know she sees a therapist, but I'm not sure her therapist has any clue about her behavior.
How will she get help if the "normal" her doesn't know she has a problem? I can just forget being resonable with her when she's in a rage....she won't calm down or listen.
Has anyone dealt with this before? What can I do?
My girlfriend is similar, i don't know about bi-polar though. But i do know there are many times she'll just say things and when i bring it up later, she won't remember saying it.
All i can say s, if u love her, i'd say support her. If she agrees, maybe go to a therapy session or 2 w/ her. The girl does sound like she needs some serious help and it is a little scary. Watch close for how violent she's capable of getting. Is she the vendictive type? Is she obsessive compulsive? Continue taking mental note of behavior patterns and if it gets progressively worse, drop her with the quickness!!! It could get dangerous.
She could on the other hand just be a strung out dope head in denial or having loss of memory from it. Either way, neither conditions are good and i'd be very careful over investing too many feelings in her.
This doesn't sound like bipolar to me. The symptoms of bipolar disorder don't switch on and off that fast in my experience. My ex had it and he would have some of the symptoms you speak of but he would have them for weeks or months at a time and he would always remember what he did. Do some research on the internet and try to get her and yourself to counseling. Mental illness is very serious and scary, it's nothing to play around with.
This doesn't sound like bipolar to me. The symptoms of bipolar disorder don't switch on and off that fast in my experience. My ex had it and he would have some of the symptoms you speak of but he would have them for weeks or months at a time and he would always remember what he did. Do some research on the internet and try to get her and yourself to counseling. Mental illness is very serious and scary, it's nothing to play around with.
I've known a couple bi-polars and they had recall of their actions. I know it comes in cycles, but they both knew what they had done during every cycle.
I didn't read up too much on this, but what about PTSD? Might be way off the mark though. But I've heard stories of people with this flying off the cuff in an instant and behaving extremely bizarrely then being "normal" with no idea of what happened. That's an uneducated suggestion though.
Do try to convince her that it's in her best interest to see a psychiatrist. She could actually be a multiple. I knew one once - the whole thing about doing things and not remembering them is a BIG clue. She should get help for this.
Location: Don't worry, I live many miles away from you.
Posts: 61
You should go to psychforums.com. She definitely has a personality disorder, and I'm certain you'd be able to pin in down there, then go and discuss it with people in your situation or even people who have it. It's a great site. Helped me a lot getting rid of a woman with Histrionic Personality Disorder.
BTW, if her therapist hasn't a clue what's going on, he's incompetent.
You should go to psychforums.com. She definitely has a personality disorder, and I'm certain you'd be able to pin in down there, then go and discuss it with people in your situation or even people who have it. It's a great site. Helped me a lot getting rid of a woman with Histrionic Personality Disorder.
BTW, if her therapist hasn't a clue what's going on, he's incompetent.
ok..i am able to handle all of the stuff mentioned - what i want is to be able to know when i can actually have access so i can help her with something she does not seem able to. i do not want to contact her parents, i think its best to keep this in a range and level where trust is built. i've said i'd book an appoiintment but what good is that if i can't contact her and bring her.
Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.
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