I'm just unsure if she wants more.

thecontender · 12th February 2006, 5:44 PM

Hi, I'm new to this forum. I've actually never looked online for dating advice at all, but am truly unsure about this situation..

Friday night I ran into a girl I used to work with a couple of years ago. We were driving, and I noticed her and honked. She was excited to see me, and invited me to a bar that she and a friend of hers that I also used to work with were going to later.

So I decided to go. It was her, and her friend. Her friend met up with a co-worker by chance at this bar, which comes into play in my situation later.

We sit down, and she immeditaely starts the conversation. The first thing she asked me was if I was still seeing my long term girlfriend (which I still am). I proceded to tell her the situation in which my girlfriend of 6 years moved 60 miles away to live in NYC, and things have just gone downhill from there. She then told me about how she and her long term boyfrind broke up as well. She went pretty deep, telling me how lonely she is, some intimate feelings. We both agreed we're pretty much in the same boat. All this time (about an hour up to this point), she has said about 5 words to her friend, paying much attention to me. She grabbed my hand when we talked about old times working together (reminiscing), interlocking our legs together. She always used to tell me how adorable I was, and started this up again, grasping my face with her hands, things like that.

Meanwhile, her friend is utterly bored with this co-worker, who's making uninvited advances, yet she still didn't direct her attention towards her friend.

Shortly after, we go outside because her friend smokes. While we're outside, I noticed she didn't bring a jacket. So without any hesitation, I put my jacket on her. She was very grateful.

Back inside, she procedes to tell me how sweet it was for me to do that, I reply with
"that's just me."
Then she says "No, that was really sweet of you." Then, she leaned in to kiss me. Now mormally when I see her, we kinda kiss on the cheek. So I turned my head a little thinking that's what she was going to do, and she kisses my half on my lips and right to the side. I don't know if that was my fault, or just what she actually meant to do.

So the night ends, I walk them back to their apartment, and she kisses me again, this time pretty much fully on the lips. It was a small kiss, but it felt totally different than the friendship kiss.

So now I'm still unsure as to what this means!?! We were always good friends, and I'm just not sure if she was being overly friendly, or if this was more of an invitation to advance our relationship. Does anyone have any solid input before I make a move and potentially ruin our friendship?

bluechocolate · 12th February 2006, 6:45 PM

You're still seeing your long term girlfriend, aren't you?

Might be a good idea to end that relationship before trying to start up another one.

Oh - and this girl was sending out, what seems to me at least, very obvious clues that she'd be interested in taking things further.

thecontender · 12th February 2006, 6:51 PM

Yes, I'm still with my current girlfriend (technically). It's a wierd situation. And our relationship is dying out day by day.

And what happened with this current girl is not helping either. I'm infatuated with her right now. She's pretty much all I can think about. And I feel like I need to resolve this before anything else.

bluechocolate · 12th February 2006, 6:59 PM

And I feel like I need to resolve this before anything else.

I think your priorities are a bit skewed. You should resolve what's going on, or not going on as it were, with your current girlfriend first. What's the alternative? You find out she's not that interested so you stay with the current girl? If so, that's not very mature.

thecontender · 12th February 2006, 7:24 PM

Those aren't at all my intentions. My girlfriend and I both understand what our relationship has become. I'm not hanging on to our girlfriend incase I can't find someone else. I wasn't even looking for someone else.

I already know how I'm going to handle the situation with my girlfriend. My only real question here is how I should read the events that happened friday night with this other girl.

Thank you for your help, though!

barfool · 13th February 2006, 9:57 AM

It sounds like you knew your relationship with your gf was winding down and that's fine, just don't let any feelings for this new girl effect that decision.

I do think she is definately giving you the go-ahead. When I like a guy I get touchy-feely, which is what she did. And going in for a kiss is an obvious "I'm available and you're next on my list."