[Cupcake]

Or maybe we never were actually a couple.

I've been in an LDR with this man in a different country for almost 7 months. I went to visity him for a week, just before the Christmas holiday. After I returned home, he called me every day. We always talk everyday via telephone.

Two days before Christmas, he stopped calling me. I tried calling him but the line was busy. I called him at work but there was no answer. A week later (after Christmas) he sent me an email apologizing for not contacting me. He explained that he had been on vacation from work and went out of town to visit his parents. He asked how my Christmas holiday was.

I was concerned that he sent me an email instead of simply calling me the way he normally does. So I responded to the email by telling him that I had been worried about him, and I was upset that we didn't speak during the Christmas holiday. I asked him to call me.

He still didn't call. Even worse, he didn't reply to my email. Now, a week later (after the New Year Holiday), I finally called him at work and he answered. It's been two weeks since I've spoken to him. I'm really angry.

I asked why he hadn't called last week. He said he's been busy at work. I asked why he didn't reply to the email I sent. He said I seemed angry. He wanted to "WAIT" until I calmed down before he contact me again.

There is no way he could possibly know when I've calmed down if he doesn't contact me. The longer he waits to contact me, I get more angry with him because the reason for my anger is that he HASN'T contacted me. How could he expect me to simply get over this without communicating with him. It's like he can disappear for weeks at a time. And when he returns, I should be happy to hear from him.

Where the hell has he been all this time? How could he expect me not to be angry about this. The way he's dealing with this non-chalantly is making me more upset. What is going on here?

[JadeStar]

Is is possible hes married or in another relationsip with someone and they found out so hes keeping things on the low? Or perhaps he doesn't want any real further contact and doesn't know how to tell you, So hes backing off the emails/calls.




Jade

[JS17]

I agree with Jade. It sounds like the great disappearing act that some people like to pull so that they don't have to "break up".

[Cupcake]

I actually considered that he may be married. But then I ruled that out since I didn't find any female stuff at his house while I visited for an entire week.

There were, however, a few phone calls that came frequently and he went outside the house to answer them and talk to whomever it was. They only called the cell phone, not the house phone. And he turned the cell phone off after talking to them.

Clearly, I know this is classic signs that he has someone other than me. I understand that. But he and I talked about this before. I don't understand why, if he wanted to dump me, he would leave me out in the cold like this. Why couldn't he give me a warning? Why would anyone want to back out of situation without closure?

[flowergirl]

Well, Cupcake, I noticed that in your thread, you wondered if you were even an item at all? To be blunt, it doesn't sound like it. I think you may have misinterpreted this guy's intentions towards you, and assumed that staying at his house for a week, and daily phone calls long distance meant you two were in a relationship. I'm basing this judgement on his subsequent actions after you came back home. Carrying on a relationship is difficult in any circumstance, adding international boundaries would make it seemingly impossible. I'm sorry this guy isn't mature enough to tell you al this, that sucks, but some guys like the attention, or having their ego raised. I wouldn't bother with him anymore, find someone who will write their intentions for you on a billboard, hopefully within your country's borders. Good luck.