My wife and I had been having marital problems for a while before see started seeing a friend of a coworker. See was up front and told me that see was seeing someone and was moving out. We have a 2 year old little girl. So eventually, she made me move in with a friend of mine. Oh, she's pregnant with his child.
I've been seperated now for about 6 months. She recently moved west with my daughter and her boyfriend. I was glad she finally moved away, but now I really miss all the little things we used to do together. I really miss my little girl. My wife blames me for not "changing" when she kept asking me too. I spent every night after work thinking about everything that happened, missing my daughter and crying.
I think I'm going to start seeing my counselor again. I also just need some one to talk to and let everything out, you know. I live on past memories and it's hard to move on. I haven't talked to her in a few days, because it's always about money and I can't take it. I've giving her at least $2500 a month. Friends think I'm crazy, but I don't want her to suffer. I still care about her. I know I can't continue to pay her that much, with debts on my end it's getting harder. I took on a second job to help with support. Thanks for listening. Jamez
Location: On an express elevator to Hell with a gas can strapped to my back.
Posts: 16
$2500 a month!!??? What does that kid eat, filet mignon every night? Dude, I hope you're at least making $120K annually because that's the salary you would need to be making for most courts (in my state) to order that much child support. She was unfaithful and took your kid and moved off with the boyfriend, and you're cranking out 2.5 G's a month for that abuse? What did you base that support amount on anyway?
Does she work? What about your new friend? Maybe you're rich, and $2500 isn't that big a bite out of your income, but it sounds you me like you may be paying for the kid, the wife, AND the boyfriend. Think about him taking her out to dinner and a movie at your expense the next time you cut her a check.
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Being married to a fat woman has its perks. For one, you will never get your ass kicked in a bar because guys are hitting on her.
You have every right to see your child. The level of child support also seems extremely high. Is this an amount you agreed on, or the amount you are legally liable to pay?
I highly suggest seeking legal advice.
Why is your wife hassling you about money when you're already supporting her? Is it not enough? If she can't afford to live on that amount, tell her you'll relieve some of her financial burden by taking custody of your daughter. In fact, are you still married? Can't you fight for custody? If she hasn't filed for divorce yet, maybe you should. I believe there are advantages to filing first. She could easily divorce you long-distance and you wouldn't even have a say in the custody terms. YOU NEED A LAWYER. I wouldn't give her any more money until it was court-ordered. Instead, put the money in a savings account for your daughter. But if you feel the need to continue to support them, make sure you write your daughter's name on the check and state its purpose. This way you have proof that you've been financially supporting your daughter. By the way, I'm not a lawyer. I could be wrong on some of these points, but, nevertheless, I suggest you get legal help asap. Be strong!
I'll just echo the last two - get to a lawyer. Some of the actions you each are taking now may factor into the outcome of an ultimate settlement. You sound like you may not want to go on the offensive, but you need to get defensive, right away. Start taking steps to protect your interests in the outcome of this thing, and to do that, you need to get with a lawyer who can at least shore up your defenses immediately. It sounds like your kid's mom is not intending to be so generous.
Promise us you will see a lawyer with experience in divorce/custody, etc. and lay it all out, get some advice, and take some protective actions - soon. Do this for your daughter, because she needs you in her life, and not just as a signature on a check. Do it now. Please respond...
Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.
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