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Past coming back to haunt

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Archive A collection of the original messages posted on LoveShack.org's LoveTalk Forum from 1997-2001.

Old 30th July 1998, 11:41 PM   #1
Shawn Watkins
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Posts: n/a
Past coming back to haunt

My girlfriend and I have been serious for about a year. And the whole time, something has been bothering her and I had no idea. She is a virgin. I am not. I am not trying to pressure her into sex, in fact, I want to wait till we are married. But when we met, I told her about my past to an extent. What I just found out is that she doesn't understand why I could have sex as easily as I did. I am not happy about my past. I have had 2 sexual partners and regret both of them. I mad mistakes and should have waited. She now says that she doesn't thinbk she can handel the fact that I had. I love this girl so much that if it wans't the fact that we are both still in school, i'd marry her. I do not want to loose her. What do I DO...someone please help. Please email it to <e-mail address removed>
thanks
 
Old 31st July 1998, 4:53 PM   #2
Ryan
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Join Date: Jul 1998
Posts: 1,020
Re: Past coming back to haunt

First off I'd say definitely do not get married. It is simply a naive gesture to think you will have reached the culmination of your emotional development in your teen years.
Those situations very rarely succeed.

It is commendable that you are not forcing any kind of action on her. It should be EXPECTED, but these days I'd like to praise and encourage that respect as much as possible. Now I'm not sure how old either of you are or just exactly what happened in your past, but the critical point here is that you AREN'T the same person you were in the past. If you are treating her well in the relationship and making no encroachment on her morals, then I don't see what her problem is. 2 sexual partners is not what I would consider a severe felony. She needs to realize that it is a part of your history whether she understands it or not. Obviously you aren't with her for purely sexual reasons. If this issue becomes too great of a stress, then this girl is not right for you. That's the simple and not necessarily kind truth about it.
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Old 3rd August 1998, 2:02 PM   #3
laura
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Re: Past coming back to haunt

your girlfriend will come around. Besides thing scould be a lot worse. You can't go back and change the past and your girlfriend has to realize that this all happened before her. I am sure that if you had met her before the other two girls you would also be a virgin. It is not your fault and I think she knows it. No body wants to think of the person they love with another man/woman but this is a fact of life most of us must deal with. The important thing is that you are with her now and she will see that this is what matters not how many girls you were with before her.
 
 

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