Ok, so here goes. I am concerned as to the sexuality of boyfriend. He is metrosexual - ish, from the Netherlands, and ofcourse Europeans are more open and not as stereotypical, i.e. men should watch football and play sports. I remind myself of this often however, here is what is troubling; we have great sex, and he is constantly aroused by me (even while just sitting in the car) it is like a constant erection. But he always pulls out and completes the ordeal on me instead of remaining inside. I'm trying not to be too graphic here. In any case, a couple of times he even pulled out, removed the condom and masturbated beside me. I thought why does he need to do that when I'm right here, most men want to stay inside at the finale.

Also, he has gay friends and recently started to work at a gay bar. Not a biggie, business was slow and it so happened his friend offered him a position. I can't peg it, but sometimes he seems a little overly interested in pointing out 'rainbow flags' or if he sees someone gay, identifying them as such. I realize we all do, i.e. make a comment or two that they are or aren't. Once we were driving down the street and there was a Chippendales Billboard and he appeared to look at it a milli second longer than I think he should have. (ofcourse, maybe I am being paranoid.)

Most of the things I read with this inquiry state the guy doesn't want to have sex, is mean, not affectionate or has had previous encounters. This guy is 27 years old, and has had 2 serious relationships with women. He lost his virginity at 18 with his first girlfriend and the second was not sexual, thus he told me he masturbated a lot (maybe this is why he does it so much now.) Lastly, I found a card with a guy on it and it advertised a gay website and had the guys info. on it and where they met and times, i.e., wed. 12-9 like if they were his work hours. The troubling part is that it was in his wallet as though he 'kept' it. We laughed when he first got the job becuz he would get propositions and numbers; maybe he accidentally kept it. But why wouldn't he immediately throw it away?

In closing, I have asked him and he has said no, even gotten offended when it came up again. ???Confused.

[LucreziaBorgia]

Its hard to say - maybe he's straight but not narrow, has gay friends and is super paranoid about getting you pregnant? The information isn't really telling enough.

[sami]

No one can judge him based on the information you gave. He, you or both may be going through other complications in your lives. There's something missing in your post. You need to be open about what you want in this relationship with him. If your concerns were not met you have no option but to end it I believe.

[moimeme]

He may just have a particular worry about you becoming pregnant or a fetish for watching the 'money shot'.

[roxy_1980]

As for the pulling out, alot of guys pull out to avoid pregnancy (as stated above). Not a red flag.

At gay bars they almost always expect the bartender to be gay. Tossing the number makes a bad impression for the club, maybe he played it up and put it in his wallet to make it look legit, then forgot to toss it.

The IDing of gay guys, well, all gay bar bartenders can do it. They're surrounded by it and can kinda tell by mannerisms and such, like seeing a guy subconciously check another guy out. Occupational effect, i guess you could call it.