[hugznkisses21]

Alot have things have happened in my past, 2 divorces with my parents, a death of a parent and being cheated on....i have noticed that i was a very strong person when i was younger and now that I am in a relationship with all these feelings i have never felt all the crazy stuff comes out.....i am soooo emotional now....when it comes to feeling of happiness, loss, rejection or anything....How can i get past being soooo emotional now...is there some kind of trick....i wanna stop being a suck and crying so much...it is hard because i have experineced so much in the past its like im an emotional mess now

[Barby]

Maybe you should start seeing a therapist so you can deal with all your losses and find out why you take things as hard as you do??!

I just responded to your other thread as well and I know you're going through tough times. Instead of accepting that things that are happening in your life aren't your fault, you seem to tend to take them and internalize them and feel like it's something you're doing or not doing or what you're not "enough" of (ie attractive, sexy, ect)

Girl you've got to realize you are enough, people have problems that they deal with in different ways..even though you're not getting what you need sexually in your relationship right now (even though I think it's more emotional than sexual) you have to realize that it has nothing to do with you. It's him and what he's going through right now.

The best thing for you would be to work on your self esteem, work on working out the emotional losses you've dealt with, then later work on your relationship.

Keep your chin up!

[hugznkisses21]

good advice...thank you i needed that.

i have become quite the suck these past few years....i nned some concrete suggestions besides councelling cause i already have that on rasing my self esteem.....although i have to say my bf does do a good job (besides this stressful time) and making me feel good about myself....its just when i do something or say soemthing i may think is wrong i get really tough on myself and expierencing so much loss makes me feel like i screwed up so much im going to lose him and i dont. I just want to be a better person for me, for him, for us.

[Barby]

What is it you do that makes you feel that you could have screwed things up between you? What do you do or why do you feel you need to be a better person..I mean what do you think is so wrong with you?

[hugznkisses21]

ummm...well for starters im very emotional...so if we argue i get tears i dotn know why im jsut emotional....im afraid that will drive him away.....umm bringing up things a coupple of times like this issue or something cause im still feeling a bit hurt about it and i hate things weighing on my mind.....i just have been in a relationship where i put in my whole heart and he told me i did everything wrong, its all my fault and stuff like that all the time

[Barby]

Well obviously the last person was an idiot....there is NOTHING I repeat NOTHING wrong with bringing up an issue that is on your mind about your exsisting relationship.


When you argue of course you're going to be upset, what is a normal reaction when you're upset? To cry of course (at least in my opinion).

I don't think it sounds like you're a "bad" person at all and there is no reason why you should "drive him away" You have and had every right to express your feelings but you have to keep remembering that it isn't you, none of these issues are your fault.

Being with him and there for you and you said he makes you feel good about yourself so obviously he's trying to help you as much as he can.....all you can do is be patient.


Please KNOW that you're not a bad person and if you see yourself this way others can pick up on the silent vibe that you don't realize you're giving out. The best thing you can do is just think positive...(easier said than done) but there is no one miracle cure even though it would be nice if there was....

[Thinkalot]

I would second the suggestion you go see a therapist and sort some of this stuff out. You shouldn't feel bad or guilty for having stuff to deal with or being emotional. I am emotional lots! I am also seeing a psych to deal with insecurity/self esteem issues which are helping drive my obsessive thinking (OCD).

Good luck to you.