[Refused]

I am together with a girl that I have rejected in the past, she useto like me so much but for years I never gave her a chance. We started seeing eachother for a little while in the summer and she came over to hangout and party with me or w/e... "she still had a bf while this was happening"
but she made out with me regardless because I guess she lost interest in her bf, btw he was her first if you know what i mean.

Major problem that still haunts me:
Anyway she comes over and we dint hook up yet, and my friend kristen is here... me and my friend and my gf now were just sitting there watching a movie and she went more towards my friend, before you know it they were making out... i dint want to say anything becauase i dint feel like I had the right because we werent going out. They went at it all night and she left in the morning.

She left and I was fine with it because I dint care too much about it, w/e I just figured I'd never talk to her and I felt hate for her for betraying me. She was seeing my friends and I dont know how it happend but she came back to me. One night at a party, she begged me to forgive her and she cryed saying how she wishes that night never happend and how one day she wants to be my gf.
So she breaks up with her bf, she calls up my friend and tells him she wants nothing to do with him and we start going out.

Now that we are going out we have had a few looong talks about the incident and each time she has no explenation for her actions of why she decided to hurt me that night, I even made her cry over it once... she sais she hates it when I dont turst her...

Love: now she tells me she loves me more then she has loved any other guy in the past, and yes we do have sex. But she told her ex bf she loved him too and he was her first! I have truly developed deep feelings for her, but I just cant get rid of the past and seem to trust her again. If shes up late at night I'm wondering "who else is she talking to"... She seems sincere when she sais "i love you" but I dont know if she is... I woke up from a dream where she told me "i'm sorry but I lost interest in you",
maybe that just shows how much trust I really do have for her.

I dont know if shes going to hurt me, or get sick of me... it seems like she wanted me for a looong time, even all my friends tell me that she wanted me for such a long time but now I feel like the tables are turned... I feel that her spark will die just like it did with her ex bf and that i'll be left alone once again...

Are these normal feelings, what do you think about this... please help me...
thanx for reading[i]

[jmargel]

How old are you two?

[Refused]

I'm 18 shes 17.