My wife and I have been married for one year, and lately it seems we are friends more than partners, and I would like to know how one would go about getting her to fall back in love with you, rather than just loving you.

I feel we have grown apart a little, and would like to get that spark back between us. I know she loves me, but I guess I feel she is not 'in love' with me.

Any suggestions?

[Matilda]

I suggest doing some reading about relationships and marriage. I have just finished reading a book called the "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. I think you might find it helpful. Also, there is a lot of great information about marriage on marriagebuilders.com.

[shortbus74]

sounds like you have entered the "comfort zone"........

If you are sincere about putting the spark back in the relationship my suggestion is plan to do things when you have free time.....quick lunch if time permits....I would also suggest doing the "little things" like filling her car up with gas...(my fiance does this for me and I him for this) helping out around the house...seeing that item at a store that reminds you of you sweetie and getting it for her......giving affection for no reason but you love to do it...looking at her and telling her you love her......back rubs!

need any more suggestions just let me know! I have a million ideals!

[whichwayisup]

Be affectionate, spontaneous, and show her how much you love her...Hearing it is wonderful too! Sometimes us females need to see it with our own eyes.

Do romantic get aways...Be silly and fun, laugh and share jokes!

Do a bed/breakfast long weekend getaway or a nice hotel.

My husband and I have been together for 11 years. I know about the spark being gone abit here and there. Just know that it does get better!! But then there will be times that spark isn't there...But it comes back. You can't always have that high sexually intensity!! I wish we did, or he did with me...But I know it will come and go as days/months/years pass.

Don't give up okay? One thing I do is make her feel good about herself. Tell her how much you want her, desire her and how much you want her to feel good when you are having sex. Put the focus on her and her only. She will LOVE that.

Post back!!!

[Stone]

I found this on another fourm I belong to but it has some awasome points....
It is a CHRISTIAN WEB sight

DUH nevermind the site isn't working I'll be right back

[tiki]

This may be the same one SH is talkin about...

lovingyou.com

I love the site, it has awesome ideas. Good luck.

[Stone]

cut and paste works wonders LOL

This list contains more than 200 things.

Listed below are some of the offenses that husbands typically commit against their wives. As you read through this list you may wish to check any of these offenses that apply to you.

___ 1. Ignoring her

___ 2. Not valuing her opinions

___ 3. Paying other people more attention than I pay her

___ 4. Not listening to her or not understanding what she feels is important

___ 5. Closing her out by not talking to her or by not listening to her (the Silent Treatment)

___ 6. Being easily distracted when she’s trying to talk

___ 7. Not scheduling special time to be with her

___ 8. Not being open to talk about things that I don’t understand

___ 9. Not being open to talk about things that she doesn’t understand

___ 10. Not giving her a chance to fully voice her opinion on decisions that affect the entire family

___ 11. Punishing her by being angry or silent

___ 12. Making jokes about certain aspects of her life

___ 13. Making sarcastic comments about her

___ 14. Insulting her in front of other people

___ 15. Coming back at her with quick retorts when we are arguing

___ 16. Giving harsh admonitions

___ 17. Using careless words before I think through how they will affect her

___ 18. Nagging her and speaking harshly

___ 19. Correcting her before giving her a chance to fully explain a situation

___ 20. Raising my voice at her

___ 21. Making critical comments that seem to have no logical basis

___ 22. Swearing or using foul language in her presence

___ 23. Correcting her in public

___ 24. Being tactless when pointing out her weaknesses or “blind spots”

___ 25. Reminding her angrily that I warned her not to do something

___ 26. Having disgusted or judgmental attitudes in general

___ 27. Pressuring her when she is already feeling low or offended

___ 28. Lecturing her when she needs to be comforted, encouraged, or treated gently

___ 29. Breaking promises without any explanation or without asking to be released from the promise

___ 30. Telling her how wonderful other women are and comparing her in any way to other women

___ 31. Holding onto resentment about something that she did and which she tried to make right

___ 32. Being disrespectful to her family members and other relatives

___ 33. Coercing her into arguments

___ 34. Correcting or punishing her in anger for something that she is not guilty of

___ 35. Not praising her for something that she did well, even if she did it for me

___ 36. Treating her like a child

___ 37. Being rude to her or to other people when we are in public (such as