[rogueless]

I live in a small southern town, where interracial dating is still pretty much taboo. I am white and an adorable black man at work has asked me out. In my town, once a woman dates a black man, they never get asked out by a white man again. They get called n***** lovers. Well, sadly, if this wasn't the case, I might date him. I've never been attracted to a black man before (other than Denzel Washington or Michael Jordan, etc.) How do I tell him this? It would make my life too complicated. What is the right thing to say? If I didn't have kids that would be treated unfairly by predjudice people, I just might grow balls and go anyway. My answer is a hesitant no. What is the best way to tell him no? Sighs

[rogueless]

I didn't get any answers yet. Is there anyone on here tonight that can relate or help me. Thanks...

[dyermaker]

Holdon, it's not a simple answer, you're going to need to give me a few more minutes.

[rogueless]

ok, thanks

[dyermaker]

You could say this:

Dear Adorable Black Man,

I've never found myself attracted to a nigger before. I mean, those token niggers on television, but they're only okay because they can't actually be seen with me. As you know, our town is in the 1850's, not just because I'm treating you like I would in the 1860's, but also because I'm behaving like an 1860's girl, allowing a patriarchal and incorrect society to dictate my behavior. Rather than control my own life, I'm going to take the easy way out and decline your request to be seen with a good white woman.

Good luck,
Darla Anne

Or you could say this:

No, I'm flattered, but I'm holding out for Cletus to ask me.

Or you could say this:

Sure. I'll pay for half.

I like the way you think dyermaker

Change can only be made one person at a time...

If you know it is an unjust societal expectation to strictly date only white men - prove them wrong!

Yeah, it may be a challenge, but at least you were doing what you felt, not what was unfairly expected of you.

[einahpets]

if i listened to everything everyone said about my bf's race i would have missed out on the best thing that has ever happened to me....