[questioning]

I have a question for anyone that has gone through a divorce and started dating someone new. I have never been married and have fallen in love with a man going through his second divorce. The loss of his children has been a tremendous heartache for him - as well as the emotional devestation of his wife leaving him - as well as the financial devestation of dividing property/assets.

As we have continued to date over the past few months, he has stated over and over that he loves me and I sincerely believe this to be true. He also says that he wants to continue the relationship.....however, every once in awhile he will say things like he isn't sure he wants to get married again, doesn't want to commit to a long term relationship - he will then follow this with how much he loves me and wants to be with me and then follow that with a - maybe I should be alone for awhile.....problem is....I love him tremendously.

My question to you guys out there that have gone through a divorce.....how do you start to feel better? I know that deep down there is something between us worth waiting for - but I don't know how to help him.....

I just want him to be happy again.....and I want me to be happy....any advice?

Thank you!

[Yikes]

Boy, that's a tough one... I would guess he just needs time. Hopefully you can be patient because he must have a ton of emotional baggage. He may be very unsure of himself and seem to have walls up at times (especially if hs ex cheated on him). Having you by his side being supportive will certainly help. Be supportive, but try not to get in between him and his ex while he cleans this mess up. He probably wants to wrap things up and move on as fast as possible, but there will likely be some pain involved.

Kudos to him for even allowing you into his life. I don't think that I will let another woman close ever again, I am just not sure that I can do that, so good for him. (and good for you too)

Lastly, listen. You may not understand how he feels, but just try to appreciate and respect how he feels.

The fact that you are even posting here asking this says a lot about how much you care.

Good luck, I hope all goes well.