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How long did it take for you to fall in love?


Friends and Lovers Progressing into "Friends with benefits" and beyond: When platonic relationships become more intimate.

Old 21st July 2004, 11:01 PM   #1
Kathylovesflowers
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How long did it take for you to fall in love?

How long did it take for you to fall in love? Some say it hits them right away (I tend to think thats infatuation) While with others it takes time. Seldom do both partners experience these emotions at the same time. Did it take you or your friend a while to warm up to the idea?

Was in days, months, or years?
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Old 21st July 2004, 11:34 PM   #2
cinnamonstix49
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It depends on the person and the love, seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years... there is the kid of love when you know you are meant to be with someone, it hits pretty instantly, there is the kind of love when you are friends with someone, it can take days, weeks, months... etc..., and there is the kind of love when someone just kinda grows on you, it could take forever, but it usually happens
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Old 21st July 2004, 11:41 PM   #3
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Almost three years.
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Old 22nd July 2004, 1:12 AM   #4
danny8630
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there is the kid of love when you know you are meant to be with someone, it hits pretty instantly,
I dont know if i can agree with this. I fell in love almost instantly...and we broke up 4 months later.
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Old 22nd July 2004, 1:56 AM   #5
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I also disagree with that, I don't think it's possible to fall in love with someone in seconds. It's possible to be instantly interested in someone, but the amount of trust, respect, and knowledge (both of yourself and the other person) is way too much to establish in such a short period of time.
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Old 22nd July 2004, 9:09 AM   #6
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I have been with my S/O for two years ... I am still falling in love, a little more everyday
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Old 22nd July 2004, 9:15 AM   #7
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I thought I had fallen in love at first sight one time but I was wrong. It was this intense connection and attraction for another person and I swore we were meant to be.


But now I'm a little bit older and have had more relationships and have realized to really fall inlove with someone you need to get to know them. Really get to know them inside and out and you fall in love a little more everyday like sports loving said. And I believe it takes months maybe years to actually fall in real love.
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Old 22nd July 2004, 9:34 AM   #8
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I met my husband at my job. (he was a client and I interviewed him)

We met after work for coffee. Sat in a Denny's for hours (they kicked us out when they closed)

I was sharing an apartment with my mom. I got home and she asked me how this date went. I calmly told her that if I ever got married, he would be the one. Two years later we did.

I don' t know if it was love or just KNOWING but that's the way it was. It felt right. Like we were meant to be together. During the next two years of courtship we fell in love with each other. He proposed somewhere in the first year I think, or maybe it was right after our 1st anniversary of meeting (darn stroke, I don't remember my proposal at all).

It's taken the last 10 years I guess to fall out of love with him (we've been together over 20 years). We are still friends. Still share a home. Still act like an old married couple for the most part. We haven't even separated all our finances yet. But we are divorcing and as soon as I have a permanent job with a salary that will support my current debts (mortgage, etc.) and possibly alimoney, then he will move out. We will probably still see each other though sometimes. Depends on where he ends up living. We both consider our marriage successful, it's just time to end it and move on (for a lot of reasons, no infidelity, no abuse, nothing like that. We lost two children which dramatically changed us and grew apart is all.)
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Old 23rd July 2004, 9:20 AM   #9
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I've been friends with Mark for 6 months now...we were friends online 4 1/2 months before we even met, that was plenty of time to learn things about him, when we finally met in person it was like I had knew him forever. I knew more about him then I knew about my ex bf when I broke up with him after a year of living together.

We have spent 4 sundays together so far....I know that's not much but after the 3rd time I saw him my feelings for him started to change, they went from infatuation to actually caring more about him then I thought I did. He brings out the best in me and makes me smile and laugh even when no one else can. He's the kind of friend that asks how you're doing and waits for the reply, he doesn't start rambling off about himself like most guys do lol.

I don't think I am in love with him, but I sure can feel love starting to grow and everyday it gets stronger and stronger, everytime I find out something new about him I love him even more.

So....I know that the third date was probably too soon, but I've knew him for 6 months and we've discussed pretty much everything. I knew about his childhood and his parents and even about very personal stuff that he hasn't told many people before I even met him.

I think that there is someone for every one in this world and when we meet them I think we can tell....you just can't sit back and wait on them though...I've learned that you have to go and pretty much work your A** to get what you want lol.

This is the first time a guy has ever not blurted out I love you by the second date and that means a lot to me, because when and IF he ever does tell me that I'll know its real.

I don't think there is a set time limit for when a person falls in love with someone else....it just happens naturally!
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Old 24th July 2004, 2:37 PM   #10
AmylovesBen
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Red face Falling in love isn't an instant thing

[font=courier new][/font][color=blue][/color]
I was very good friends with my boyfriend before I started going out with him. There were no feelings of instant love because it didn't really occur to me to, because he was in a difficult relationship with one of my best girlfriends.

Anyway, falling in love was never an instant thing for me, but I always knew there was something special and worth sticking around for. I had my first kiss with this man. It was so exciting, but so natural at the same time. his parents were away on holiday, and we spent the whole night just talking by ourselves, until 5am before we kissed.

I don't think I believe that falling in love is instant, because I fell in love with the fact that my boyfriend was so different from other people, and had to know more about who he really was before could even fully comprehend what falling in love is. Love is a journey, and every day you find something different that makes it all worthwhile.

The weird thing about my relationship is that I am always analysing it, and this sometimes makes me unhappy. I got to the point where I broke up with him for three weeks, because I wasn't sure about what I was feeling towards him. Over time I have found that if I just allow things to develop, things just happen by themselves, and thats when I saw that I had already started to fall in love, without even realising. I guess that's why they call it falling in love, because it is meant to happen over time, and is supposed to deepen and stengthen every day. I know now that I want to be with Ben forever, and that he is the perfect person for me. Btw, I am now 19, and he is 20, and we met when I was 16 and he was 17, in sixth form college. We have been together for a year and three months.

I'm not sure whether this makes sense, but its how I feel.
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Old 24th July 2004, 3:38 PM   #11
Kathylovesflowers
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AmylovesBen

I have to say. That is more how I feel about things also. In my situation, I first found we had some things in common. The commonalities have been the instant bond, yet some other things were somewhat different. Over time it has been some of these "other" things that i find special. To recognise these things would only have taken time. We find ourselves opening up to things more and more every day. Were always thinking about each other as our discussions easily flow and we also pickup and add onto little topics from past conversations right where we had left off.

It's taking a lot of time to nurture and develop but it has been a beautiful experience thus far. We enjoy each other and accept each other for who we are. The more we learn about each other the more we appreciate each other. Its a journey for sure.

I found it always takes time to really love someone.
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Old 21st September 2004, 1:41 AM   #12
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Cool falling in love

I have been in love many times. I have fallen in love with some over time and with one only at first site.

I was in a relationship with a man I 'loved' and met his friend, Terry, who was a country singer. I feel in love with Terry when I first heard his voice; it was like an angel singing in my ears. I sat next to him to listen to him sing and felt ELECTRICITY, not goose bumps, flow through my body. (he told me, later, that he felt it, too) I knew at that moment I loved him-my bf didn't take it too good, however. Anyway, I had the kind of love that gave me physical symptoms: we broke up for about 3 days (after our first year together) and my heart ached. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, I FELT my heart tighten and ache! I hitchhiked 30 miles and walked 5 through ice and snow (in penney loafers) to make it back to him. I got frost nip on my feet, but I loved him that much. I still love him, we're just not together (complications of a miscarriage and older childs death).

I think that one can convince onesself to fall in love with a person (I have, also, done this) and that one can convince onesself to hate another person or to fall out of love.

Very rarely does love manifest itself physically, it is an emotional felling. My dictionary reads: instense affection for another arising from kinship or personal ties; a strong feeling of attraction resulting from sexual desire.

that's my two cents.
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