[stewwy]

Well, heres the quick version. My gf and I decided to take a break. so I flew home for a couple of weeks. while I was home we talked and worked some things out and agreed to work more on us when I returned. when I got home there were used condoms in the trash. they were from a box that I purchased just days before I went home. I absolutely lost my mind. I grabbed my things and emailed her some of the nastiest things I have ever allowed through my head. she had plenty of time to explain and give me some explanation, but she didnt.

After the smoke cleared a bit I became (and still am) very depressed. All I want is for this whole thing to go away and for her and I to be back in that magical place where we dreamed and romanced and loved. I am so confused. Could there be a reasonable explanation for the condoms? and if there is, after all the nastiness it inspired in me is there a possability for her to get past the things I said? any advice please......

[capitald]

1. cool off...if you deal with her angrily your relationship is done.
2. ask her politely about the condoms.
3. if she has a good explanation you have to trust her and let it go.
4. if she cheated on you get as much space from her as possible, and send a letter stating everything you feel, EVERYTHING, and never go back.

[stewwy]

the thing is I provided ample time for her to explain and she didnt. thats when I got nasty, only through email, but it would have embarrassed a porn star. three days before I left we were talking about who would be there when we got married. I bought a ring etc. then this. I think I want so badly to be wrong. I think I reacted naturally, but I dont know.

[capitald]

sounds like you lost her, maybe she wasn't the right one, once you said those nasty words I think ( and I am saying I think not I know) that they sealed the deal. Lick your wounds, return the ring, get back on the horse, go slower next time.

[stewwy]

your probably right. Another problem is we have all the same friends. I have emailed some wonderful lyrics and poetry that I have written and one of our friends who is very close to the both of us lets me know that she saves all the poetry stuff that I have sent in a special file. I know its true because the friend even quoted some of it. Should I take that as a sign of hope?

[HoldOn]

Ok, um,

Deranged Angel referred me to this thread....

Why would there be condoms in the trash unless you'd been having sex? Unless she has a roommate or lets her friends have sex in her room, then she's having sex.