[nips5050]

I recently started dating this guy (over a mth ago)

We hit it off AMAZINGLY on every level.

The problem?

Whenever we do something, it's typically unplanned....he'll say, Call me later when you aren't busy and maybe we can get together.

which I'd rather just plan something, ya know? And then he'll say he'll call and he doesnt.

I dont get it. It confuses the heck out of me. I mean he admits to how much we connect and how it kinda scares him and that he wants to spend time with me but he's so inconsistent.

I like him but i dont know if I can put up with that. Do I tell him how that bothers me? Or do I just stop seeing him altogether??

[Debster]

To me it just means that he is casually dating you and enjoys spending time with you but is not interested in forming a committed, exclusive relationship.

Decide what you want and then you'll know what you need to do.

[dudesomewhere]

hmm

I am looking at this from this perspective...similar but with just a friend...sure it's a female friend .

Scenario...I'm a stay at home type mainly...I'll go to the bookstore and maybe electronics store and I don't club or bar hop. She on the otherhand is all over the place, goes to clubs, etc. So knowing that I can't really ever get a hold of her...I just call her whenever. I mean, if I call her all the time and she's not there most of the time...what's the point?

Now...thing that bothers me with PEOPLE is that their concerns like yours...they don't friggin end up telling the other person. I mean I do but people get freaky with the extreme honesty . Now if I was in his shoes, I'd want to hear your concerns because that's what it's all about. Of course, I don't know what type of person he or you are...you both could be the types who like playing the dating game...and just let me stress that isn't bad if you're into that stuff. I hate games and especially the dating game where it's all about ambiguity.

So...you have to decide who it is you both are and see if the truth is the option, ie., voicing your feelings...or not say anything and give him the run around. Yeah, I don't like the runaround thing myself

[CurlyIam]

hi,

why leave everything up to that guy? I mean, why don't you listen dude's advice here and call the guy up and say: "listen, I don't know what I'm gonna do Friday and Saturday, maybe I'll go out with my friends, maybe I'll go to the gym! But I would love to see on Sunday and catch a late movie".


I think constantly deciding when to call, where to go, what to do can add a lot of pressure on the guys! So if the driver's seat is free, hop on in!!!

Don't be agressive or mad because of it. Enjoy the ride, see how he takes your next move (btw, I would have needed an advice like that when I first started to date my bf ) !

Cheers,

Curly