WEll, today was definitly a rough day. I spent the time with my boyfriend and we are OFFICIALLY BROKEN UP because I seem to get all hot and bother with him, but can;t seem to have sex. What's wrong with me I don't know. When I told my mom that I have been talking to him, she was pissed at me all day, and when I just came home several several hours latter, she yelled at me.
So, I am now alone. I can really say that I will have no one in my life because of the way I am. No one seems to accept that I get all hot and horny but can't seem to have sex with the guy. So, I will get nowhere. How great. I love my life.
I spent the time with my boyfriend and we are OFFICIALLY BROKEN UP
Hallelujah!
because I seem to get all hot and bother with him, but can;t seem to have sex. What's wrong with me I don't know.
Nothing is wrong with you. Something deep inside you knew this guy was a jerk and wouldn't let you have sex with him.
So, I am now alone.
No you're not. You've got your friends. You've got us!
I can really say that I will have no one in my life because of the way I am. No one seems to accept that I get all hot and horny but can't seem to have sex with the guy. So, I will get nowhere.
Now really. Listen to what you're saying. You are worth more than a sex object. And you do not want to be having sex with jerks in order not to be alone - you'd feel much, MUCH worse if you were doing that.
Longlegz, the solution to your problems is not in other people, and especially not in any male who happens by. Your solution to your problems is inside you and if you go see a therapist, that person will help you find your happiness. You keep thinking 'if only I had X, I'd be happy' but I guarantee you, you would not. This unhappiness is for you to fix, not to try to escape through a man or travel or a job because it won't leave you alone until you face it down with treatment.
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I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good, therefore, that I can do or any kindness that I can show to my fellow creatures, let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.
Sarah....I know it's hard. Heck, I have found fixing my own life up hard! But I'm doing it, little bit by little bit.
And I am no better than you are...I just decided it was time to stop obsessing! And with help of those around me and patience, and medication I am healing. You will heal too, and many of these issues will start to go away when you get better.
We can't fix you up. We can give you advice, but it's up to you to act on it.
Make a list of things to do after easter...and stick to it. Put - go to Dr as no. 1, and book into a counsellor as no. 2, and read books on family relationships, or mother daughter relationships as no.3 (the library has plenty- which I've read when I was going through tension with my mum).
We all support you on this. Then you can report in on how you are going.
I am glad to hear that you guys are behind me. I really appreciate it. It is really hard and I wish I did not feel so stupid but I do. Why can't I seem to find someone who can hold off on the sex thing and just want to get to know one another until we both feel ready to do intimate stuff? I just don't get it and I really don't get why I feel so stupid.
Sarah, dear, your focus shouldn't be on relationships right now. You won't be able to have a good r/s until you're fine on your own, and as of now, it doesn't seem to me that you are.
There ARE guys out there who will like you and let you wait w/ the sex thing. BUT one thing to keep in mind is - if you don't wanna have sex, don't get yourself into sticky situations with the guy. Keep your clothes on, and his hands on the outside of them. That way you'll avoid the situation where you're turned on but don't want to have sex because you're not emotionally ready -- that situation is recipy for disaster b/c you'll leave unsatisfied either way.
Anyway, now that u've finally broken up w/ this dude, it's time to straighten up your life. When are you going to see a counsellor? a doctor? send out your resumes? Keep us updated on your progress
YES: I know I have to focus on myself and that is what I am going to do. I was in a very sticky situation with this guy where I only thought about this guy and nothing else. And I know I was doing the wrong thing by accepting his behavior. But it is over and I can now focus on my life which I should have done before, but could not do it.
And yes, I am going to go to the counselor and even the doctor within 2 months. I realize I just have to do this because I have alot of issues that need some taken care of. So, I want to do that. I just have too.
And as far as the resumes go, I have been sending them out, but not as much as I would like. This is a rough period for my field as far as getting a job. Sure there are tons of opportunity out there, but just getting your foot into the door is really been a struggle. So, all I do is keep trying. And if worse comes to worse, I would go back to college to get my masters degree as much as it is not needed for my field unless I want to be a teacher. So, those are my ideas as of now.
I have been taking deep breaths and feeling alot better about this situation with that losser of a boyfriend that I had. It is over. No more emotional abuse or verbal.
I have been taking deep breaths and feeling alot better about this situation with that losser of a boyfriend that I had. It is over. No more emotional abuse or verbal.
That's great, Sarah! You didn't need more hassles!
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