[guilty]

After 23 years of marriage and at the age of 42 i had/having an affair with a guy i met over the internet
I took my new friend to meet my "best friend".....and after a few drinks she told my lover she had slept with my husband 16 years ago....
What a kick in the teeth for me that was !!!!!
Anyway long story made short.....i have left my husband and now live alone....we both admitted to each other what we have done......my problem is............
I'm not sure how i feel about him....i know i did the same thing.....but it hurts so bad how he and my EX best friend could have done that to me.....i am feeling the guilt that if i had not done what i did....i would never had found out what he did....so maybe this whole mess is totally my fault ??
I married when i was 17 and my hubby was the only guy i had ever been with......was that the problem ?
I need help and suggestions on how do i cope with the guilt on my part and the hurt those two are putting me through now.....am i the one who is to blame ? Is it normal to feel so alone at first?

[Sundaymorning]

I kind of feel like you were being selfish. Come on you both cheated. She just was the kharma coming back in your face. MOve on, grow up.

[cutiebabe]

I kind of agree with Sundaymorning, however i feel you shouldn't feel guilty. Its natural to and it was obviously supposed to happen.I understand how you feel betrayed by ur best friend but you have to think, imagine how ur husband felt when he found out? i mean it was a guy u only met over the net. Why would you risk a perfectly good marriage on a stranger? unless ofcourse the marriage wasnt going anywhere in which case divorcing was the right thing to do. C'mon you have a life to live...let go of ur past and look brightly into the future.
Blessed Be.