[Holly]

Can I have some advice regarding post-college relationship prospects?
I am close to the end of my university experience, at least the bachelor's degree leg of it. I dated one guy forever, and at the conclusion of that relationship had found someone new. That particular relationship is one of those that is unlikely to "go anywhere," as they say.

Now, my question is how do I keep my eyes on the prize, my goal of graduating, without worrying about finding a suitable partner?? I don't spend a lot of time socializing with my college-age peer group at bars and parties. I have a small circle of close friends but beyond that I am completely satisfied to be away from the mindless party scene.

Is there hope to find a good person to date and have a relationship with in the workplace? I know this is a silly question but I am at an age where I want to find a my complement, my partner to share life with. I don't subscribe to the thought that I need to be married before a certain age, but I'd like to know my options will still exist post-college.

[yes]

ideas in random order:

- online dating
- singles parties
- many hobbies make you meet ppl - join clubs (e.g. tennis club)
- gym
- graduate school
- volunteering
- strangers (careful!)
- clubs/parties
- ask friends to introduce you to single guys

that's all i can think of right now.

workplace is a bad place for relationships, i believe - it gets too difficult both during and after (if there's an after) the relationship.

my 2c,
-yes

[peaches1234]

I have an unusual suggestion -- a pool hall! A decent one, not some skanky place with crotchety old guys This is one place where you can go where you don't have to party it up and will most likely be filled with people your age. There just might be a few guys wanting to help you with your pool skills (if you are like me you have none, and I found needing help a good way to flirt with my now-but-wasn't-then boyfriend), or if you are a shark that'll impress them all.

[wiseOLDman]

Holly, I was one who was sure that I'd be engaged by the time I was graduated from college. I had always had long-term relationships and figured that, with maturity and 18,000 women at college, I'd surely have met the one before I left school. Didn't happen tho. I dated a little bit after college, some collegues and some thru mutual acquaintances, but nothing too serious. I met a lady one day while I was playing volleyball with friends from my apartment complex. She was sitting by the pool and I'd never seen her around and asked if she wanted to joing the match. Long story short, we were engaged 6 weeks later, married 1 year after that and just celebrated our 18-yr anniversary. We were 26 when we married.

So, the moral of the story is, you never know when or where you're gonna meet "the one." In my case, I stopped looking for her and suddenly there she was.

Other good sources:
Mutual friends
Hobby groups
Parents and their connections (believe it or not, sometimes mom does know best)
Places of Worship

Don't sweat, it will happen. Focus on getting thru school and sorting out your career. Everything else will fall into place eventually.

[Holly]

Yes, Peaches, and WiseOLDman-- Your advice cheered me up today. It's nice to hear these encouraging words from kind strangers. The pool hall idea is a neat one, and I'll check it out. And as for the wise man who has been with his beloved for over 18 years, your story is an inspiration! Thanks for taking the time to write.

[peaches1234]