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I guess it doesn't help matters much that my husband goes to lunch with his secretary every day.
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So you are worried that your husband may be having an emotional affair as well? If so, your marriage may be in crisis and "fixing it" may be beyond your means without some
real help.
You haven't actually
done anything yet, so now may be the time to lay everything out on the table before it's too late and you've reached the point of no return. Once your emotional affair turns into a physical one, communication will shut down because then you'll be working too hard to keep what you've done a secret.
Tell your husband how spending so much time with his secretary makes you feel (if you haven't already). Tell him that you have also found a friend you enjoy spending time with...and although
nothing has happened, you're worried if things continue the way that they have been, your afraid that
both of you might eventually give in to temptation. You don’t need to give him names or details. Since you say
nothing has happened yet, then those facts are irrelevant and will do nothing except make him angry and defensive. Tell him that you think your marriage is worth saving, but if the two of you can't come to some agreement/compromise on your own, then perhaps it might be in your best interest to seek relationship counseling. Tell him you’re willing to do whatever it takes to save your relationship, but that he must be willing to meet you half way.
If ever there was a time to make a move and yank this marriage back on track...That time is NOW! Remember, there’s nothing to be afraid or ashamed of. You haven’t actually DONE anything yet!
Please, please don't wait until it’s too late.
get out of it
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