[Fiji]

I apologise in advance for this complicated story

I got a rare illness which meant I had to have some of my small intestine removed. My boyfirned at the time, peter, stood by me all the way through it and we got engaged. Shortly afterwards I ended up back in hospital and was told I had severe scar tissue around my fallopian tubes and was told i could never concieve. peter and i were devestated at the time but went ahead with our lives and I began working as a singer again. Just two months later I discovered I was preganant. i was absolutely overjoyed and me and peter began planning for the baby. When i went for a routine scan, i was told the babies spine wasn't forming properly, due to my illness and all the medication i had the baby would be born deformed. I didn't want to put a tiny baby through all that pain so my doctor arranged a termination.

Just before the termination, peter took a knife to me one night during an argument and cut my shoulder. He said i was selfish for getting rid of the baby even though it posed a danger to my own life.

I went through with the termination witthout him and the only person who supported me (I have no living relatives) was his best friend, Steven. Now, I'm working again and have a nice new flat but Ii can't move on from getting rid of my baby. And now Steven has told me he loves me and wants to support me. I admit, he has been there and over time my feelings for him have developed but I'm not sure its a good idea

Although I know he could support me emotionally, Peter would get involved and it would become to difficult to have a relationship with him.

I need to know how I can move on and how I can get together with Steven by causing the min amount of damage, i suppose I'm being selfish, i want some happiness.

Steven and I have ended up in bed a few times, which confuses me ven more because when we have been together he is so loving and caring. he is always there to hold me and when i need him he is always around. Is what we want to do wrong?

[Tony T]

YOU WRITE: "Although I know he could support me emotionally, Peter would get involved and it would become to difficult to have a relationship with him."

To hell with what Peter thinks or feels, the second he took a knife to you and cut you HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN OUT OF YOUR LIFE FOREVERMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It makes no difference what the two of you may have been arguing about. Civiilized people don't chop others up...animals do!!! GGEEEEZZZZZZEEEEE!
How could you possibly stay with somebody who committed such a violent act against you, for Pete's sake???????????????????????????.

Dump this Peter guy, divorce him, or DO whatever you have to do in England to get A MAN out of your life. And if it's not too late, call the Bobbies, cops, police, Scotland Yard, and have him jailed for assault. He has got to be the biggest ******* on this planet.

I can't believe you would write a post like this. I can't believe you would have the slightest feelings for somebody who did this to you. Get him out of your life and stay as far away from him as possible. If somebody can cut you with a knife, they can just as easily KILL you!!!

As for your new honey, go ahead and do whatever you want but make him sign a paper that he will give you sufficient notice before he might ever decide to slice you up so you can leave town.

[luvmyboys]

I wouldn't say what you are doing is wrong as much as I think you need some time to heal and come to terms with the loss of your baby. You may need some counseling. Jumping into a new relationship after just ending another one rarely works. Plus, I hope you're using birth control so that you don't go through something like this again.

As for Peter....stay as far away from that man as possible! Anyone that takes a knife to another human being is a sicko. You're lucky he didn't kill you and why did you not call the police? Love yourself first, over any guy!