What where you doing while your spouse was cheating?
Sorry, I know this question raises a lot of anger in people. I am tiring to possess my feelings and I hit a wall every time I remember:
I was taking care of our kids and doing the dishes so my wife could “Work Late”. I found out later she was out at a local bar with her EA, Who was a married man. This happend more then once. My anger still boils 6 months after dday!
Stayed home worrying while she went out on her numerous "girls nights out." She even had the balls to run off to a hotel with her F buddy while I held a birthday party for our son...real Mother of the Year candidate, huh?
Sorry, I know this question raises a lot of anger in people. I am tiring to possess my feelings and I hit a wall every time I remember:
I was taking care of our kids and doing the dishes so my wife could “Work Late”. I found out later she was out at a local bar with her EA, Who was a married man. This happend more then once. My anger still boils 6 months after dday!
I understand your anger.
I was miserable working a job I hated, ironically, the business I helped him build because I was supportive and loved him, all so he could go to where his tramp worked and write big checks so she could be impressed by how much money he had.
My brother had a heart attack, so on two separate occasions I was out of state sitting by his side in a hospital for a total of a little over a month.
Then for 2 weeks I was out of the country, and we ran up a massive phone bill with each other, saying how much we loved and missed each other and how we wanted to make our marriage better. He could go straight from me to her and vice versa without missing a beat.
Great question! I was working three jobs for a while before I got hired into one permanent position, so we could have health benefits! Got one child off to college while two came home after graduation.
He had been in and out of work because of a bad back which turned him into a legal drug addict on pain meds. The operation was successful and he kicked the pain pills cold turkey. But in those six months he was a raving lunatic and I lost most of our support group who could not handle his "cold turky" mood swings. He remembered none of it, but I lost all of my support system because of it. Friends starting disappearing because he was such a loose cannon.
I was sooooo alone, but grew optimistic that the worst was behind us when he landed a big-job. He was drug-free, pain free, and we were both employed and starting to pay down the debt we had accrued during his years of unemployment.
I thought we had turned a corner, and it was all good again.
Three months later he crashed into her, a divorced co-worker, and she thought he was wonderful. He re-invented himself in her eyes, and they embarked on an 18 month long affair. He spent money to impress her as a big player, money I did not even know we had.
Hell, I thought he was traveling for work, late night business meetings, all of it! I supported him completely!
The title of this chapter in my life is, "My wife so loved and supported me to climb above my depression, she made it a piece of cake to have an affair with a lonely single mother!"
I was taking care of our kids and doing the dishes so my wife could “Work Late”. I found out later she was out at a local bar with her EA, Who was a married man. This happend more then once. My anger still boils 6 months after dday!
You get angry so you come post here?
Here is my question. Would she do that to a man she respects?
If she had any respect for you... would she leave you at home to do chores while she played with another guy?
I was busy planning my suicide, while working, taking care of kids and extended family, including watching my father die. That was the last time. I now know that the first time, I was pregnant with our youngest.
__________________
Feed your faith and your doubts will starve to death.
Depends on whose view it’s coming from. If you ask my MM’s W she’d say “…taking care of the kids…cooking and cleaning…up all night with [the newborn]…taking care of him…” (what he says she said during one of her accusation outbursts). He’s complained she’s at home “…being a nag…talking to the kids any kind of way…looking like a big, ole…” I think they’re both right.
Changing diapers, doing laundry, making dinner, watching the clock, sat in the dark listening for his car pulling up, waiting for him to come from work, he was always late coz of heavy traffic. Sat home with kids while he went out to the pub with his "friends". Climbing into an empty bed at nite coz he lost track of time at the pub. Laying awake staring into the darkness, listening for his key to turn in the lock. When we were home together, he'd be at his computer day and nite, chatting with her, no doubt. Fun times! A whole year of my life wasted.
__________________ you've been too gone for too long, now it's too late to come back home-------randy travis
Maybe this is inappropriate but its a story from a friend of mine. Years ago she had an A with a much older married man. She told of how they had sex in his car and how she felt when she looked up to see two car seats in the seats behind her. Then she realized the W was busy at vacation bible school with the older kids.
We joke about it now. It was years ago before we had children of our own and didnt really understand the situation. But whenever something like this comes up we talk about how its bad enough to have an A, but to do it when the wife is at bible school....youre definitely going to h*** for that.
Again. its in poor taste to joke of such things, but its what i thought of when i read this post....
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My anger still boils 6 months after dday!
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