[drillman]

[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1] the internet with so many great sides also leads many people into behavior that can overtake you like any addiction. My wife and I remet each other after many years through the Internet, we used to date in high school. however our new relationship was a long distance for 8 months before we got married and I didn't really know the woman I was marrying. she made herself out to be things she wasnt. I find that being married to my new old GF is a mistake but im still trying to save it. We have many problems, and one of them is that my wife is continuing to write to some former boyfriends on her computer when she thinks i don't notice. I found out she was doing this after finding several e-mail addresses in her purse. its so ironic, since the computer brought us together and now it might drive us apart.

im just wondrering if anyone has relationship rules out there for computer use?

can i demand to see what she has on her computer?
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[carhill]

Sure, full disclosure. Print out the e-mails and discuss them with her. Nothing wrong with being friends with ex'es as long as H is the priority. That means H is fully disclosed and knows W's friends personally. If these 'friends' are local, invite them over for dinner

[drillman]

I wish there was full disclosure, but when i ask her what shes doing when she's obviously typing a email she always says, "oh, nothing", or she says shes writing a girlfriend. when i asked her about a man's name i saw in her emails, over her shoulder, she said it was just a platonic friend and im being paranoid. she wont let me see exactly what shes doing or whats in her emails she says its an invasion of her privacy.

[mem11363]

You are doing nothing wrong. If she has nothing to hide, she has nothing to hide.

And I agree with Carhill - provided NONE of the guys is trying to flirt. As soon as they do that, they have breached a trust and need to be cut out. Because having a bunch of guys around who are on deck to replace you, is not cool.

Originally Posted by drillman

I wish there was full disclosure, but when i ask her what shes doing when she's obviously typing a email she always says, "oh, nothing", or she says shes writing a girlfriend. when i asked her about a man's name i saw in her emails, over her shoulder, she said it was just a platonic friend and im being paranoid. she wont let me see exactly what shes doing or whats in her emails she says its an invasion of her privacy.

[drillman]

i found some suggested rules for internet usage, im going to try to ask her to consider them. it says you really should be open about what you do on your computer with your mate.