[lettym]

Ok i've been severely depressed for a long time and sometimes i will go days without eating but for some reason this it's worse, so much that i haven't eaten since monday. My depression is caused by being stuck in this house that i cant seem to get out. I'm finally trying to get a job to get out of here and make some money and meet new people but no job yet. All i do is cry on and off all day and i have noone to talk to. I have a best friend but sometimes i dont tell her when i'm going through things like this because i dont wanna bring her mood down along with mine. Do you think it would be or look stupid if i just wrote her through a text message about whats been going on this last week and to tell her if she can call me cuz i gotta talk to someone?

[Ronni_W]

Originally Posted by lettym

Do you think it would be or look stupid if i just wrote her through a text message about whats been going on this last week and to tell her if she can call me cuz i gotta talk to someone?

lettym,
If that is the best you can do for yourself right now, then, no, it is not "dumb"...it is smart/wise. You are responsible to ask for whatever support you need.

You might want to consider changing the content a bit, though. More something like, "I hope you're doing good. I don't have the strength to call you right now, but I'd really appreciate if you could call me. I really need my best friend."

Please keep in mind, though, that others are not obligated to do what or when you would like them to do as far as supporting you, listening to you, etc. They may have their own problems and issues, or they may just feel that that cannot properly give you what, how and when you need. And that's fine, too -- it doesn't mean that they don't care, only that they don't have the (inner) resources to help you in the ways that you need.

If your best friend can't meet what you want and need right now, then she can't...and that is perfectly fine. It's then your responsibility to keep looking until you do connect with someone who can...even if that turns out to be a person the other end of a crisis hotline.

Hugs. It sounds like you have a lot going on. I'm sorry that you're going through it.

[Peaceful Guy]

Originally Posted by Ronni_W

Please keep in mind, though, that others are not obligated to do what or when you would like them to do as far as supporting you, listening to you, etc. They may have their own problems and issues, or they may just feel that that cannot properly give you what, how and when you need. And that's fine, too -- it doesn't mean that they don't care, only that they don't have the (inner) resources to help you in the ways that you need.

wow, that really helped me with something ive been trying to understand. thank you ronni.

[Ronni_W]

Originally Posted by Peaceful Guy

wow, that really helped me with something ive been trying to understand. thank you ronni.

You're welcome, PG. Thank you for taking the time to post

The thing about the piece that you quoted: It is SO easy to forget...especially at the times when it really bears remembering! I often have to remind myself of it, too.

lettym, I do hope you're feeling a bit better.

[Peaceful Guy]

Originally Posted by lettym

Do you think it would be or look stupid if i just wrote her through a text message about whats been going on this last week and to tell her if she can call me cuz i gotta talk to someone?

i think it would be fine. i don't think you should worry about how it would look. its okay, you need a friend, she is your friend.