[2sure]

** Told my daughter a fluorescent pick 6" vibrator was an emergency road flare. One day when my ex, her Dad was over fixing something in the dark...she came running into the room with it "Dad, use this!"

** More recently after looking at her cell phone bill...."If you dont stop texting so much I will insist that you stop actually speaking" She was so confused by this, she didnt have a smart response. Thank god, because it made no sense to me either.

** Or the guilt thing: You want what?? Look at my shoes!! How can you think about asking for anything while I am wearing crappy shoes!"
Mind you, I'm driving a mercedes.