[TheCrawfordsNM]

I am reading all these posts about people who are cheating or thinking about cheating and it makes me literally sick to my stomach. Let me tell you the other side of the story to give you something to think about before you decide to betray your spouse and break the vows you made to God on your wedding day.

I am 29 years old and currently married to a wonderful man and have 2 beautiful children but to this day I am still suffering on a daily basis for the cheating my ex-huband did. We started dating our Junior year in High School and got married one year after Graduation. He was the love of my life and my first true love.

We were both very strong Christians, went to Church regularly, and had a wonderful life. I worked to put him through school because I was going to be a housewife and I "didn't need an education". He got his engineering degree and was (and is) an Engineer for the largest micro-processor company in the world. We built a beautiful 5-bedroom home, bought 2 new cars, and were trying desperately to have a baby.

Sometime into our 2nd year of marriage a new girl started working with my husband. She was 2 years older than we were and a single Mom and something about her made me very uneasy. We went to a Christmas party at her house and she totally doted on my husband and ignored me and then I went to a volleyball game my husband was playing in (he wasn't expecting me there) and she was sitting on his lap. I NEVER thought my husband would cheat being the God-fearing man that he was but I still forbid him to speak to her or be friends with her. Several people started calling me to tell me that he was going to lunches and things with her but when I confronted him he denied it. We had our 3 year anniversary and he sent me a dozen roses, took me out to this fabulous restaurant, and bought me this card that he wrote "You are my soulmate. I know we will be together forever! I love you with all of my being! Forever Yours Faithfully, his name. Three days later while he was in the shower I got a really weird feeling and I went and looked at his cell phone. There was a number I didn't know programmed into the FIRST slot of his telephone directory. I called the number and the girl I forbid him to talk to answered the phone. When I told her who I was she hung up. So, I called back and told her that my husband would never leave me for her and if she was having an affair with him all she had to do was tell me and I would leave him and she could have him. She started crying and told me she was pregnant with his baby. I kicked him out that day...he moved right into her house...I filed for divorce on that Monday and my divorce was final that Thursday.

Then, to make things worse, he was ordered in the divorce to pay all of our debt (which was substantial) because I had put him through school and helped him get where he was. Well, about 9 months after the divorce I started getting calls from Creditors that he wasn't paying. I hired an Attorney and filed to reopen the divorce and have the debt transferred to me and get his wages garnished. Well, then he filed for bankruptcy which forced me to file for bankruptcy as well. So not only did he break my heart and ruin my trust in men, he also ruined my credit.

This all happened 6 1/2 years ago and to this very day, not a day goes by that I don't think about him and wonder what evil spirit possessed his body and made him do this because the man I was married to would never have hurt me this way. I love my husband now but I will never be able to love him or trust him the way I did my first husband...he stole that from me too. Every time my husband now looks at another woman I feel like I am going to lose it. In fact, a single Mom with a daughter just moved in across the street and she is very nice but I am already imagining my husband cheating on me with her.

People who cheat do not realize that they go on with their lives like nothing ever happened while the person that was cheated on is hurt and devastated for years and is changed forever. They can never trust again how they use to because they won't be made a fool twice. I did some things that I won't admit to on here to get even with them and it helped me momentarily but I still think of things every day that I could do to them to make them suffer for what they did to me. (They're still married and have 3 kids now). She tells me to stay out of "thier life" but what she doesn't understand is that it's not "their life"...it was mine and my husband's life and SHE came into OUR life and destroyed it. She is living MY life with MY husband and she has everything I have done coming to her!

Anyway, all I can say is that God will place judgement on everyone and it says in the Bible that adulterers will not dwell in the house of the Lord. Adultery is a sin...it's breaking one of the Ten Commandments. It's wrong. If people would talk to their SPOUSE about the problems they run to their little girlfriends and boyfriends about they'd probably have a better marriage. When you are married there is no reason to have friends of the opposite sex. There are plenty of people out there of the same sex to talk to and it won't put you into a position that might cause you to stray. You are affecting someone for a lifetime when you make the decision to cheat and the thing is that we are only on this earth for a short time...when we die it is forever. Is getting a new piece of Xss going to be worth burning in hell for all eternity? Think about it! If more people would be true and loyal and stay married all these kids wouldn't be so screwed up now days. Good luck to all of you!