I've been quiet for several months, but have rediscovered LS again, so I just wanted to pop in and say hi. I haven't seen my MW (now divorced) in an entire year, and the last time we communicated via e-mail was about 3 months ago. I've been over her since last summer, although my curiousity does get the best of me at times as I'll send her a quick e-mail to say hi... even though they're infrequent. I'm at the point where I can be friends with her and nothing more. The funny thing is that she's no longer a MW, so even if we did get back together it would be a legitimate relationship, but I'm not even interested at this point! Funny how that works out.
In any event, for those OMs and OWs suffering through your own situations, I want you to know that I was there, too! And NC does work! It takes tough sacrifice and lots of tears shed, but in the end, just keep in mind that you will be fine. Go out with your friends, stay busy and do whatever you need you to do to take your mind off of things. I think the most important piece of advice I can give is to make sure you're out on the weekends. Nothing hurts more than being at home on a Saturday night and wondering what your MM or MW is up to.
Because of my experience, I made a promise to myself that I would never go down the MW/OM road ever again since I know the pain it creates. Plus it's just not the right thing to do. There are LOTS of great single people out there. Go meet them!
Anyway, I hope everyone is well and I'm looking forward to reading the threads again on this forum.
__________________
"Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something." - The Princess Bride
I wish you well in your further healing and growth and most importantly, I pray that you can find a real relationship with a single honest woman. No matter one's past, it should not dictate their future.
I wish you well in your further healing and growth and most importantly, I pray that you can find a real relationship with a single honest woman. No matter one's past, it should not dictate their future.
Perhaps it would be of interest to some here to know what your "breaking point" was and when you "suddenly" (or gradually) felt your feelings for the ex MW changing. Was it an event that happened? Or just time and distance?
I ask because some of these stories can be of great help to many posting here...
After she (your ex MW) divorced, did she want to pursue a deeper relationship with you?
There was no one thing that happened that made me get over her. Feelings just dissapated over time. Time spent apart and total NC is very helpful in getting over someone.
At the time we stopped seeing each other, she had just gotten separated. She told me that since she had been married for over 20 years, that she'd regret not taking the opportunity to be single. So basically, no, she did not want a deeper relationship with me, even though I wanted it with her.
It is so refreshing to have a postive, upbeat story in this forum. I often wonder how the outcome of my A will go and hope to be in your shoes (ok with everything) soon.
And I agree, one EMR is enough for me. I'll never do it again, but I have learned a lot that I can take with me.
Good luck with your future
__________________
"Life is too short not to love and too long to be miserable!"
It is so refreshing to have a postive, upbeat story in this forum. I often wonder how the outcome of my A will go and hope to be in your shoes (ok with everything) soon.
And I agree, one EMR is enough for me. I'll never do it again, but I have learned a lot that I can take with me.
Good luck with your future
That sounds soooo good WF. You continue to grow and be blessed.
There was no one thing that happened that made me get over her. Feelings just dissapated over time. Time spent apart and total NC is very helpful in getting over someone.
I think this is very true. Sometimes it is quite shocking to discover how resilient the heart can be. I'm glad to hear you're in a better place now, ratings. Party on.
__________________
"There are still too many days when I'm the only woman in the room." -Nancy Pelosi
Awesome to hear you're doing well. I am on day 5 NC, but gosh does it hurt. Reading your post gives me hope, though. I never knew I was getting involved with a MM, he lied to me from day one by telling me he was already divorced. At least most MM or MW that I read about on here have the descency to admit they're still M! Anyway, we were engaged and I just found out. We even had our ML. Still hurts but I know I will be ok in the longrun, and reading your post makes the future a lot brighter for the ones who are just beginning NC. Thanks!
I've been quiet for several months, but have rediscovered LS again, so I just wanted to pop in and say hi. I haven't seen my MW (now divorced) in an entire year, and the last time we communicated via e-mail was about 3 months ago. I've been over her since last summer, although my curiousity does get the best of me at times as I'll send her a quick e-mail to say hi... even though they're infrequent. I'm at the point where I can be friends with her and nothing more. The funny thing is that she's no longer a MW, so even if we did get back together it would be a legitimate relationship, but I'm not even interested at this point! Funny how that works out.
In any event, for those OMs and OWs suffering through your own situations, I want you to know that I was there, too! And NC does work! It takes tough sacrifice and lots of tears shed, but in the end, just keep in mind that you will be fine. Go out with your friends, stay busy and do whatever you need you to do to take your mind off of things. I think the most important piece of advice I can give is to make sure you're out on the weekends. Nothing hurts more than being at home on a Saturday night and wondering what your MM or MW is up to.
Because of my experience, I made a promise to myself that I would never go down the MW/OM road ever again since I know the pain it creates. Plus it's just not the right thing to do. There are LOTS of great single people out there. Go meet them!
Anyway, I hope everyone is well and I'm looking forward to reading the threads again on this forum.
RG, It's so Great to hear from you!. I have often thought about you. Sounds like your doing well. Gosh.. (((((Hugs))))) my friend.
AP
__________________ Life's like a boom-a-rang. The more good you throw out, the more you receive in return."
Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.
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