well my bf and i have been together 4 mths. We had sex on the 2nd date i regret to say. We have a really good relationship. But our main problem is that he doesnt call all the time like he should. I really love him and he loves me. But last weekend, he brought about this idea of he and i "pausing" our relationship. Just to take a little break, because he going through alot right now, and i wouldnt be able to see him as often, we are 1hr 1/2 apart now. When he said for us to pause the relationship , he said that we would still be committed to each ohter adn will not sleep with other people. I told him it was a stupid idea. I dont pause relatinoships, i completely breakup and be done with it. So he said he wasnt going to break up with me and sense i dont agree with the relationship pause idea, he said never mind , we would just try to work through this tough time. What does relationship 'PAUSE' mean to you women or men? please help

[Tony T]

Couples usually pause or take time to "get some space" when there are serious problems in the relationship. In your case, I totally agree that it's a really stupid idea.

If he's got to separate from you everytime he's going through some rough life stuff, this may happen dozens of times. Two people who care for each other are supposed to go through tough times together and give each other strength and support.

I have always felt just like you do. If things are bad enough to pause, they're bad enough to just call it quits. This space idea is a lot of crap and it serves no purpose. I mean the two of you have only been seeing each other four months...not very long at all. It's way too soon to even be thinking about space.

I think some guys use this getting space line as a prelude to a break up. They are cowards and it's easier to call it quits if you are apart. However, it doesn't look like that's the reason in your case. You'll have to decide that.

If he ever asks for a pause again, tell him you'll be happy to accomodate him...permanently.