do not talk with them
call them
anything

u deserve better
these creeps will make u laugh and open up
then steal important things from u

do not let your guard down at any time

please

if u have been hurt really bad by them

go directly to NC

[whatwentwrong19]

They will never change that's for sure. Now I'm not a woman but in my case I was the victim yet I notice a few people will still think it's funny.

[bonehead]

Originally Posted by whatwentwrong19

They will never change that's for sure. Now I'm not a woman but in my case I was the victim yet I notice a few people will still think it's funny.

You right.

People find it hard to believe that women can be abusers also

[blind_otter]

Unfortunately there are a whole host of reasons why women seek out abusive relationships. And most of them are not easily summarized on a message board. As long as there is low self-esteem, codependency, lack of will power, do-nothingism, and crazy making behavior, there will be abusive relationships. Abuse a feedback loop, not something that can be understood if isolated from the relationship system in which it occurs.

But point taken.

[bonehead]

Abuse a feedback loop, not something that can be understood if isolated from the relationship system in which it occurs.

Please explain

[blind_otter]

I'm loathe to answer that question because I think that you're fishing for a debate .

I've been in a series of different abusive relationships. The last one culminated in state prison time for the man who abused me because he tried to kill someone in front of me.

But I am accountable for the crazymaking behaviors that I engaged in.

IMO, there are two people involved, and the roles are never as black and white as people would like to believe.

In fact, by acknowledging my own negative patterns, I've grown out of them and have been able to establish my first relationship that has become abuse free.

[blind_otter]

It was like....there was something broken inside of me that made me irresistably attracted to abusive men. When I attended to the broken parts of myself, I stopped being attracted to abusive men. Go figure.

[bonehead]

wasnt fishing for a debate. Was looking for your train of thought.

Thought you were saying the abuse was a direct action of the relationship

[IpAncA]

Originally Posted by bonehead

wasnt fishing for a debate. Was looking for your train of thought.

Thought you were saying the abuse was a direct action of the relationship

Just look up abusive realtionships and such on the internet. Lots of discussions can be made about abusive realtionships which has in the past led to heated debates.

I think I know what she is talking about but I'm not 100% sure.

[bonehead]

I got what she was saying in her second post.

And it makes sense. Some people are attracted to the abusive type, and there is a reason for it. Once that reason is addressed they normally are able to break that cycle.