[koala bear]

Hey it's a girl here that my have had the same problem as your wife. Not the lying part but.... here just read this.

Ok masturbating feels really really good. OK But if a women does it to much (like everyday) you like that feeling and nothing else feels good till you stop and it takes a while for you to feel good agian and it's hard not to masturbate because you need that feeling. But sex just DOESN"T DO IT!!! It's all about willpower.

And as far as watching MFF or FF or FFF that's easy to explain women are beutiful. I don't like looking at men naked but I'll watch women as long as they aren't on my man. Naked men aren't attractive SORRY YOUR NOT!!

Do you know if she had anything bad happen to her. Because raped or abused women act this way she may no know what is going on . I hope this helps I don't think she is gay. I have kids to and I used the same excuses because sex hurt when I was pregnet so that is when I started masturbating and after I had our son sex just didn't feel as good as what I could do myself. I did want my husband to feel bad about not pleasing me. I searched for info and found out I had to STOP to enjoy sex with my husband again. So I did. IT WAS THE HARDEST THING I HAVE HAD TO DO.

[pasister]

Your story hit close to home for me. My husband and I have been married several years and our sex life is not good. We have sex about once every 2 weeks (which is better than some couples) but he watches porn and mastubates almost every day (sometimes several times a day).

We have talked about it and I have tried to tell him that it is not the porn, it is not the masturbation, it is about the lack of intimacy and desire. I feel unwanted and that I come in second place to a movie. I have offered to try new things, offered to watch the movies with him, offered to please him however he wants. He always says things are fine and that nothing needs to change. But then we go to bed - he is on one side of the bed and I am on the other. He waits for me to fall asleep and then he gets up and goes to watch porn. I am right there with him why doesn't he want me???

He watches porn when I take a nap, he watches when I go to the store, he does it whenever he can but he denies me - says that he is too tired, or that I am too tired (I love it when he tells me how tired I am), or the kids, or whatever.

I am not saying porn or masturbation is wrong, I am just wondering if I am just being selfish. I love my husband and want to share myself with him but I don't get the same feeling from him.

I absolutely do not think he is having an affair - I just think he has some issues, feelings, fantasies, etc.. that he cannot share with me and I don't know how to make it better.

I have tried and tried to talk about this with him and we have argued about it. I am also intimidated to talk about sex with him but I have forced myself to open up to him and "spill my guts" and all I asked in return was for him to trust me and open up to me. He just said that he did not have anything to say because everything was fine.

I don't know the solution to your problem but I feel for you - let me know if you figure it out. I am considering moving to the couch so he doesn't have to worry about me waking up to find him gone - he can just take of business by himself in bed without me. I am at the end of my rope - maybe seeing his pregnant wife sleeping on the couch will tell him how serious I am about working through this problem together.