Question for WOMEN only..... It's a Wife issue.

li'l bunny · 11th March 2005, 8:49 AM

My hubby does not do that. The only time he looks at porn is with me and then he doesn't really want to.

As for the drugs....I really hope you have no kids involved in this. My H has never done drugs and would never to drugs. I know a few men who go out now and again and do it but certainly not married men.

LucreziaBorgia · 11th March 2005, 9:38 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Married_Woman
Question for the married women...

My husband of 3 years, has days every now and than that he does Speed, close our bedroom door, he's up all night watching porn, looking at his porn magazines.

He says all men do that.

Does yours?

Thanks for answering...

D.

No. Mine will smoke a little and stay up all night programming his game stuff (he is a software and game developer/programmer) or watching movies from Blockbuster. He'll look at pictures of nude women (mostly artistic or deviant type stuff) and occasionally some actual porn between other things he happens to be doing on the computer, but its not too often, nor is it for too long at a time. Being pleasantly high doesn't lend itself well to hardcore porn/sex/masturbation. The mind simply wanders before you can even get there. Heh. There's only so much excitement one can get out of it anyway before it just becomes motion on a screen. I watch it more than he does, and I don't watch it that often.

I can't imagine setting aside an entire night for drugs and porn! Geez!! Is it some hobby for him? Or a compulsion? How old is he? What's your sex life like otherwise?

JadeStar · 11th March 2005, 10:45 AM

No my husband doesn't do speed. Yes he has watched porn sometimes. I don't know that I would say that ALL men do it, I think alot of the time people that say that, its just a way of them justifying what it is they are doing. Also it depends on the amount of time hes viewing it, if its all night, every night or just about every night, then I would say he needs some help. For the speed as well. Good luck.

Pocky · 11th March 2005, 11:51 AM

Dubious.

whichwayisup · 11th March 2005, 12:23 PM

My husband doesn't do that, no porn and no speed.

SOME men may do that, but not all men.

I think if it is bothering you then you need to talk to him. Find out why he has to beat off to porn alot. The speed is another issue all the together.

Tell him how it makes you feel and somehow it is affecting your life and the marriage??

Good luck.

Rosewilt · 11th March 2005, 3:53 PM

No, my husband does not do either.

He may look at porn and maybe I dont know. But he doesnt do drugs.

I think it's a huge problem and he needs help, you need to talk to him because that's harmful to his health and to yours.

Dont play with your health

RecordProducer · 18th March 2005, 12:37 AM

My ex-husband was masturbating with a porn magazine when I was "very" pregnant (

) and couldn't make love to him anymore. A friend of mine who's married told me he used porn sites for that purpose, but I don't know how often. Many men love porn.
If I were you I would be worried about him doing speed. I don't know what speed is exactly and how it affects the brain, but I get the impression that you mind the porn part more than the drug part.
I think what a man does with his penis when he is alone is his own business. I understand that you would like him to sleep with you and not stay up all night with pictures of other naked women.
Why doesn't he make love with you instead? Do you reject him or does he reject you? What he does shows how unsatisfied he is with his life. Maybe you should help him instead of accusing him. You didn't post enough information.

24th March 2005, 8:54 AM

Hey Im actually so glad you wrote this, my husband does the same thing!He only used to do speed every once in a while, but now starting to get a litlle out of control.And he is so sexual on it also, looks at magizines,and computers, and likes to talk about fantasies. Now im thinking he is getting to interested in his fantasies and may want it to become reality, i dont know what to do.

km · 7th May 2005, 10:38 PM

I can tell you, from past experience, that some husbands surely do practice what your husband says is normal -- and that those husbands are ADDICTS.

The porn is a compulsion that he needs to practice WHEN he does speed, which he does because he's addicted. And he's got no time for you to get in the way of this habit. He is trying to buy himself the time alone to do what he wants, when he wants it, by giving you this line of bull. The bull indicates a level of DISrespect for you, and a level of desperation.

I was lucky - I stayed with my husband and he eventually broke his addiction. But without any counseling, and so underlying issues (immaturity, mistrust, arrogance) remain, and it ain't no picnic.

I'd start going to Nar-anon asap. If you want to stay married, that's one thing. But place yourself first. Take care of yourself.

amy1975 · 7th May 2005, 10:51 PM

no my hubby doesn't do speed or look at porn.

What a waste of time-he could be doing something more constructive than wank off to internet porn.

I don't know how women can stay married to assclowns like these guys-i wouldn't respect him, let alone have any desire to sleep with him.

do you have daughters-if so, watch them real well when they around 'daddy'

SexKitten · 7th May 2005, 11:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Pocky
Dubious.

yes.

though nothing is impossible...

but yes.

SexKitten · 7th May 2005, 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by amy1975

do you have daughters-if so, watch them real well when they around 'daddy'

i would hope you mean "children" because of the drug use, and not just "daughters" because you assume someone who is an addict and looks at porn simply must be a pedophile or into incest.

please remember that as gross as it may be, men who are fathers do have a sex drive, and just because they may be interested in sex and have daughters doesn't mean they fu*ck them.

ew.

this is not to say that this particular man doesn't have issues, but i think to assume the things that you assumed is ignorant.

11th May 2005, 7:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Married_Woman
Question for the married women...

My husband of 3 years, has days every now and than that he does Speed, close our bedroom door, he's up all night watching porn, looking at his porn magazines.

He says all men do that.

Does yours?

Thanks for answering...

D.

Hi there!

Just wanted to say this is a VERY common problem..... And it saves many marriages I am sure of that.

But in our house, it is me (the wife) who surfs all nite! Yes, really.

Good luck

JanieQP · 11th May 2005, 3:57 PM

Well, I was married.

And no, he didn't take speed, and no, he didn't watch /surf porn.

I tried to get him to watch a movie with me once, and he found it tasteless. Okay, so I could probably have found something higher class. (Where I live, they're on free after midnight, and I've seen a few when jetlagged.) His commentary: "I prefer the real thing."

Craig · 11th May 2005, 4:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Married_Woman
My husband of 3 years, has days every now and than that he does Speed, close our bedroom door, he's up all night watching porn, looking at his porn magazines.

He says all men do that.

If all men do speed and watch porn all night then he wouldn't have a problem with you talking about his nocturnal activities to other men (or women). Why not offer to invite all the men from the neighborhood to a "speed and porn fest" then see how normal he thinks it is.

Bottom line is he has a serious serious problem. I'm a guy and have never thought of, nor would I ever do what your husband is doing.