[Dookie2004]

Im angry this really sucks, my ride to the festival thing was cancelled, my parents out of town, my sister somewhere else (god knows where) and Im screwed sitting at my house. So in the mist of all this, Im picturing her waiting for me down in town and I dont show up! Im really worried about how shes going to take this, Im upset about it. All my plans just crashed and burned!

It seemed so perfect too! Last night was going to be it, the night I tell her everything, I was so determined and then about 1 hour before it was go time I get told that my ride has been cancelled because they had to go to some family issue thing. So Im like.......NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

But this gives me a chance to test her patience seeing how she takes this could influence on how she is. But as I typed in my last post she is very angry at her friends, I dont think they're going to be influences on her anymore. Even her best g/f friend is no more. Im getting her out of this, she is really caught up in with a group of stuck up people. Shes not like that, and neither are 2 of her other friends. Im going to do my best to advise her. She has put her trust in me in the past and now more than ever.

But as the situation stands I still gotta wait for a chance to talk to her. I let her down, I dont know if it could be stood-her-up situation because it really wasn't a date thing but it was the fact that I said I would be there. Maybe Im just taking this a little too hard but Im a guy of my word, I do my best not to lie even if it could be used in my favor.

So now I play my guitar and think about how this could turn out. It won't be that bad right? If anything this shows her that I am free and that she cant hold me back, maybe it will make her try more to hold me. But problem is on that equation maybe she thinks I dont care about her.........Im sure she knows or has thoughts about my care for her.

And you know what you practically written exactly what I thought it was, it was literally a great relationship, maybe thats why it went like it did, a little too serious at a young age, god isint life crazy

[wiseluv34]

hey, i'm glad u see now, that you need to be more laid back, in your relationship with your ex. if anything, you know that this girl is your ex, for a reason....maybe in the past, you 2 rushed into love, or maybe you and your ex couldn't agree on some issues. i just know, from what u told me...a/b why this girl's your EX(because she's immature, by what you told me).
it's probably a good thing that u couldn't go out last night, to meet this girl. yeah, show her that you have other things in your life to focus on, besides her.
sounds like she's cutting all of her friends out of her life, well...maybe she should give them the "benefit of the doubt", b/c we all need friends in our lives. we just have to keep them in check, sometimes. let our friends know how we really feel, a/b some issues. like, your ex should've just told her friend that she need to be with u alone. and if this girl is her real friend, then she should've understood where she was coming from. u know?
also, if your ex choose to cut all of her friends loose, then are you ready to be tied down with her all the time? b/c she will only have u to hang out with, if she don't have friends anymore. and your right, you 2 are too young to be so serious. just have fun together...but don't let life pass you by, just because you only focused on you ex, at such an early age.
and for your not showing up last night, if she asks you why you didn't show, just explain to her your situation.....THAT U DIDN'T HAVE A RIDE...and if she do show an angry side, or if she don't understand your reasons, then just know that she isn't ready to experience the real meaning of love (which is sacrificing ourselves, for the one we love).
let me know what happens! [color=green][/color]

[Dookie2004]

Well Im being advised by other people that I should call her and tell her why I wasn't there. I'm debating that greatly and odds are I won't call her, because it wasn't a date it was just a chance that I might see her there actually I asked her if she would be there, and she said "yes" and then I told her I'd like to see her where I was hanging out she said "ok".

And the battle with her friends, its not all of them its just a select few who are actually arrogant and are some of the worst people I have ever seen in my life. So it won't all fall to me, hopefully.

But my question is this now after reading your post: You say that it is love, that if she gets angry then she isint ready to experience love. Do you think she looks at us as love?

Another thing on my mind that is also confusing it indirectly effects her but it is a good question: Does she (any female) realize what they do and do they understand the direct effect it has on males? In other words (Im sure she realizes) everything that she has done in the past and what it has done to me.

I am now remembering a conversation she and another guy had while we were sitting at the "pad".

The Conversation:

"Hey didnt you go to the prom with (a guy Ill refer to as "J") J?" said a friend.

"Yea" said the ex.

"Whos Jeff" says I.

"My brother" says friend.

"He hates me now so....." says ex.

Do you think she intentionally said that to cover herself and make it seem that I wouldnt have anything to worry about? It was a shock to her, her action to the question was in a shocked stance.

I kinda of wish she also hugged me that night as well, but the sitting extremely close to me was also very interesting. She sat right to my left both are thy's very very close and her left rubbing against mine. At one point between the play fighting I found my arm around her, once I realized what I did I removed it.

2 reasons why: My FRIENDS ARE KILLING ME! They will not shut up its killing me! I got one saying shes willing, and I got the other saying shes playing me. Both of them are causing a emotional battleground that I cant face. I felt that I should remove it before anyone gave me any rude comments about it. And 2ndly I was still under that fact of determenation to walk on. But as we can see, thats hard this forum is proof of that.

But my true question is does she realize what she has done to me, does she know that her actions have made me crazy? In my thoughts of looking at it, I think she does, she knew exactly what she was doing. Now I got thoughts of her loving me back vs the thoughts of her playing me and spending time with another guy.

You gotta understand that this is the first time I have ever seen her outside of school and it was under the worst possible circumstances. I wanted to spend time with her alone but to rid of my friends was impossible.

Something I left out: When I got home I was tired, I got on the internet and I walked off, she logged online. Now its usually whoever logs on while the other is on they say "Hey" but I was away and she initiated conversation, indeed that does sound like something so small and that it has no signifigance. But it does, I replied "Hey'' we got into a conversation about the night (mostly about her friends) and we played a simple game of internet checkers (I won). Somewhat of gaming flirtation in the game, but one thing she said to me that stood out in my mind was:

"I cant believe you didnt know that "J" was (my friend) brother?" the ex said.

Ugh, she brought it up right after I was telling her that she was too sweet and too much of a good person to be hanging around people who are mean to her. That hurt, why would she bring that up? As I said before does she realize what she is doing? I think so, she knows exactly what shes saying and how it will make me think.

Then I ask her if she will be there tomorrow and she says yes and says ok to see me at the "pad".

Conversation ends with "goodnight" on both sides. Now Ive gone the whole day without talking to her, sitting home and actually so bored I cleaned some of the house up. Is letting her dangle with thoughts of why I didnt show up last night so bad? Does this show her that she needs to work harder to get to me? Or will it hurt her?

[wiseluv34]

hey, i had to reflect on your message, for a little bit. you're worried that she's upset, a/b you not showing up the other night?
well, to solve this problem....you'll need to call or email her, to ask her if she went and had a good time...and then let her know that your ride was cancelled, and just see what she says from there. in other words, see if she cares if u weren't there or not.
and as for the "guy" that she's been dating, I REALLY THINK U SHOULD LISTEN TO YOUR BUDDIES, B/C IT SOUNDS LIKE SHE'S PLAYING THE FIELD. yes, she likes you....but she isn't just into YOU, she's going out with other guys.
and, to answer your question a/b do ladies know what they're doing? the answer is "I'M NOT SURE, B/C I'M A LADY TOO"
we sometimes do things without thinking first...so we can get ourselves into some deep ****.
and i agree with you, about what u said a/b guys really take our actions serious, that's the way my "friend" is...he's taking someting that i did, very serious. but anyways, we aren't talking a/b me.
as for u taking the advice of calling her, i think u should give her a call, just to see if she missed you the other night. you'll find out sooner or later, if she was with another guy on that night. b/c she sounds like she's playing the field. i could be wrong, but she's already let u know that she's going out with another guy. u need to date other girls, just like she's dating other boys.
let me know what she says, after u talk to her!
keep me posted, peace

[Dookie2004]

She is not dating another guy, the prom thing they were discussing is from last year, she was clarifying that she has no more connection with that guy. Also she has no boyfriend at the moment as I know of, and all the guys who I thought were with her, werent.

And just now on MSN were discussing how people are screwing us both over. And she says "I will always be your friend no matter what" I reply "Same for you, you really mean alot to me" and she says "aww".

Good or Bad?

[wiseluv34]

OK, now i think you're trying to see what MY reaction will be to your comment....am i right? (heehee).
because you're smart and knowledgable, enough to know that...IT'S ALLLLLL GOODDDDD!
the fact that you and your girlfriend are communicating, and sending direct and sweet messages to each other...is a GOOD sign! you 2 have it together now. don't you agree?
i mean, now she's opening up to you, and you're opening up to her, so your relationship is progressing.
you're doing a good thing, by being her friend...and being there when she need you. CAN U BELIEVE, THAT I'M 34 (TURNED THIS AGE IN MAY 21), AND I'M JUST NOW FINDING OUT WHAT THE REAL MEANING OF HAVING A FRIENDSHIP WITH SOMEONE SPECIAL REALLY IS?
in my past relationships, i've lost a couple of good men, just because i came into the relationship, without beginning to be friends FIRST.
i think that u know more a/b relationships than i do, or did. ok, now i'm involved with a GOOD man, and i almost lost this man...just because i was heading straight for a relationship, without creating a FRIENDSHIP first, but get this....he's correcting my issues.
my parent has really schooled me on everlasting love, my mom is VERY wise and religious..and she told me, that for me to EVER have a fulfilling, lasting relationship with a man, we have to be friends first...
now, can u believe this about me? i've really just learned to sacrifice myself, for the one i care about. and God has been sending signs my way, also. which is very important, b/c i'm a firm believer of Christ.
so, i think that u know that you and your ex, are on the "right paths", to developing a good friendship.....which will lead to a fulfilling relationship.
pls let me know what u think, a/b me...and what i've written to you!
peace

[Dookie2004]

Fellow Christian,

Dont be surprised by this, I am also a Christian. I am not just saying that either, I know how most people are when they are asked about religion and such. But I lie not, I cannot lie I cannot be compelled to do evil. That is why I endure and do my best to hold true to what is right. I am a repentant soul at the age of 15 and a disciple of Christ at the moment I repentented. I know the hardships of life and you know how young I am, God directs me and I will not falter. Fear and Worry is still growing from the stresses from my life but I will not fall. You are a very interesting person, I will aide you at the best of my ability, as you can see my patience is great if it wasn't I wouldn't promote this forum.

My name is Adam, Im 16, Christian, and very phylisophical and believe in the bible. I found God on his Will, nobody preached to me, I was driven, my spirit was cleansed and I felt the holy spirit, I do my best to do Gods will. For me to now know your belief I think me and you should go bowling now and talk about all the troubles we face. For you see I could just as easily write her off, and I could just as easily destroy the entire relationship so I wouldn't have to face this worry, but my beliefs show me to forgive and be good to all. But when I look at my situation Im in fear of sin, for I could be finding myself in lust or envy, but Im not sure anymore.

I think you are one of the greatest people I have ever met, and as a Fellow Christian obey what Gods Signs are to you, because only you actually know what they mean. God never hides his intentions, I have felt them before, when you feel it was an act of God it always is, for the feeling is unique.

My ex and I are talking more on a friendship basis indeed, she helped me alot last night when I was a little stressed out telling me that I have helped her in the past and that everything Ive said to her means alot to her, I explained to her that shes very important to me on a multitude of occasions last night. So yes it is getting better I must say. She also brought up one of my friends making her mad because she asked them if I was at the festival, he said "why so you can just run off and make him mad again?" so she got ticked off by that, Im sure more was said its just I dont know of it. But things are getting better, school begins again tomorrow, so more trials are ahead.

Endure Friend,

Adam

Psalm 23 - You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; my cup runs over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the Lord Forever.

[wiseluv34]

Adam, i'm so glad that you revealed your relationship with the Lord to me, you sound like a chosen one, too. ok, i'll let u know more on me..my name's Varietta, i was baptized at the age of 12, and i have always known (also christians have told me), that i'm a child of God. i also, have experienced the feeling and touch, of the holy spirit. that's why, when we sin...God lifts us back up, letting us see sin as low and shameful, never to do again. i've sinned, we've all sinned and came short of the glory of God, but God forgives us and cleanses us, to leave that sin behind...and to push towards a future of christianity.
i'm glad u opened up to me, i knew that you sound so mature and u have clean conversation! i'm enjoying our talks. well, i saw my friend today, we had a nice chat and i left it at that. i know that if it's gods will, then our relationship will progress. and if not, then i know that ALL THINGS WORK FOR THE BEST, FOR WE WHO LOVE THE LORD, AND ARE THE CALLED ACCORDING TO HIS PURPOSES. ROMANS 8:28.
so, adam...pls remember that what God have for us, will be the best! and we will receive it in the right timing, Gods timing.
yes, i've made mistakes in relationships..and i will make more mistakes b/c i'm imperfect...but i'm better than i use to be. i'm more patient and self-sacrificing. that's a GOOD start
i feel that my friend is right, in Gods eyesight..b/c he's interested in me...and not lustful things. he was willing to get to know me, and not to just rush into making love, and i hope i didn't mess things up with us, by trying to "rush". but, he's a forgiving man. (i didn't pursue sex, i just flirted with him a bit).
and as for you and your ex, you're being friends is going to go a long way, b/c if you can't be friends, then nothing will happen..b/c we have to form a friendship first.
and maybe your friends need to stop meddling in you and your ex's business? sounds like they're being out of line, sorta. but, of course your friends care a/b you, they don't want u to end up getting hurt..and that's sweet.
all i can say, is for you and your ex to be more respectful of one another. don't flirt with other people, if you 2 want to stay friends. just keep being friends, and things will happen if they're meant to be!
thanks for your kind words to me, i enjoy your company! let me know what's up, peace.

[Dookie2004]

SHE HAS OPENED UP TO ME MAJORLY!!!!!

She is revealing so much suffering and pain she is feeling, I feel so much want to help her.

[Dookie2004]

She has just told me something so personal, so hurting to her soul. This was something so great, she puts a major deal of trust in me! Shes crying I want to help her, shes so hurt by her past, its really serious (Im sworn to secrecy).

I do enjoy your conversations Varietta, but as you can see this is a major stepping stone. She has literally opened a very deep and personal relationship between us. I feel so different all the past vibes are eliminated, she is talking to me so deeply, though she is still my ex....it is all being rewritten.

I feel different now, my communication with you, something has happened here, I believe my discussing and confronting you about my true self has brought me great circumstances, glory to god.

Im so worried for her, I want to help her. I believe that her telling me something NOTE:

She says I am the ONLY ONE she has ever told, nobody else knows this, and with the information she revealed to me I could understand why. I think her trust in me shows great love and emotional care on both our parts.

The Lord Works in Mysterious ways,

Adam

P.S. Dear Varietta I want to be able to communicate with you beyond this forum, dont find this odd but Christians are there to support each other. Dont look at me with an odd eye, but everyone needs emotional support and you are a great aid in my life, and I feel I can help you as well.

[wiseluv34]

heyyyyyyyyy, sounds like you're love is improving! i'm happy 4 you, b/c God only has what's best for his people!! you and me. this is a great thing, that she's revealing her innermost feelings and secrets to you! this means that she truly views you as a real friend. she counts on you, Adam, so continue to be there for her!
yes, to God be the glory, in all things!!! just know that all things work for the best, for us (Gods people)
i had a nice day, also. i told u a/b how my friend lost 2 of his loved ones this past week. i'm being there for him, and he said that he truly appreciates me. i visited him today, and he just stared at me and smiled, in a way you just couldn't imagine! i care for him, and i pray he's feeling the same. he also told me, that what i do was forgiveable (i dropped by without calling, b/c i didn't know i'd be in his city, but i had to take my sister over there b/c her car broke down on her. so i apologized for any inconvenience). he's also opening up and revealing more to me. pls pray that we come together mutually (his name's walter), he's a swell man. i only want Gods will, which is perfect and true.
adam, remember that love isn't self-seeking...but it's self-sacrificing. b/c God gave up his son (Jesus) for our sins, and that's the perfect reflection of TRUE AND HONEST LOVE.
i'm glad you and your ex's relationship is improving, i'll pray for you both! holla at me
peace

[Dookie2004]

I cant believe this happened, I dont know what to do.....hear me

Today I only saw my ex (Angela) once, and the time I saw her was awful, she was walking down the hall with the same guy she was once flirting with, there was no holding hands or anything she was just talking to him, she was less than half a foot (NOT EVEN A WHOLE FOOT) away from me as she passed....She didnt say a word to me She just kept on walking, now if it was just me I believe she looked at me from the stairway as she was going upward.....should I confront her? Telling her that "you walked right by me with some other guy and didnt say a word to me"

Should I get this out? What should I do, maybe she was just talking to him, maybe shes trying to see what I will do, after what shes told me last night shes very insecure and she has a very good reason (classified), but this really sux, whats her angle here! She JUST WALKED RIGHT BY ME!

This is the end of the conversation me and her had last night before today:

Adam - Im going to bed
Angie - ok goodnite adam i love oyu
Angie - *you
Angie - thanks for everything
Adam - after killed me
Adam - ah either way, I hope you get to feeling better
Adam - and if I can ever do anything to help you, you know where Im at
Angie - ok thanks
Angie - same goes 4 you
Adam - good night angela
Angie - goodnite adam

Take notice to the second thing said in our conversation "ok goodnite adam I love you"
I DIDNT AKNOWLDGE THAT....was that my mistake? Is she once again trying to pull that out of me?

Im hurt and I dont know how to respond to something like this, I know its something simple, but its NOT SIMPLE this is so PAINFUL that she JUST WALKED BY ME....or did she not want me to face this fella?......I dont know what to do

PLEASE HELP ME ASAP!!!!!!

Note: that the "after killed me" thing I said, we were playing checkers she won

but thats not the point....HELP!

[wiseluv34]

listen, i'm sorry she dissed you like that. but, why should you confront her? what REASONS do you have to ask her why she was ignoring you while she was with her guy friend? that's a waste of time, adam. i'm sorry to say this, but it sounds like this little gal is very SELFISH! and selfishness isn't showing any signs of true LOVE. now does it? you're smart, so pls just move on and drop her. apparently, she didn't want her boyfriend to know that she had been conversing with you, therefore...she ignored you. (she's a 2 timer!).
i think you should just press forward, and leave that "heartache" behind you. she doesn't care a/b anyone's feelings here, she's lying and faking....all at the same time! be wise, and get away right now. it's probably just lust that you have for her, b/c she don't sound like a compassionate person.
IF IT WERE ME; say for instance..a guy did this to me (same as she's did to you), i'd have to just FORGET this man! b/c apparently, he wouldn't be caring a/b my feelings, he would be just wasting my time. AS A MATTER OF FACT, something similiar to this did happen to me, in college i was seeing this gorgeous guy (whom was a romeo), and we dated and broke up, dated and broke up, and got back together again (or so i thought), well....he poured his heart out to me, apologizing for his wrongdoing, and begging for me to give him another chance (he cheated on me, with one of my girlfriends!), well, i gave him a 2nd chance...stupid me! and the next day, right after he'd charmed me into taking him back.....i found him flirting with one of my other girlfriends!!! they were getting ready to make out, when i walked up on them. well, that was it for that jerk!
i moved on, and he kept trying to get me back, but i lost all feelings that i had for him, and u want to know why...adam? b/c he only wanted me for s*x, he didn't care for ME, he was selfish and dishonest and inconsiderate. in other words, he didn't care for me at all.
DO U WANT TO END UP GETTING HURT BY THIS GIRL, CONTINOUSLY? I THINK U NEED TO MOVE ON AND DATE A NEW GIRL, FORGET THIS PLAYER, B/C YOUR EX IS UP TO NO GOOD. sorry to be so blunt,, i just want to save you from more heartache.
let me know what u decide, peace

[Dookie2004]

Well I was hurting when that happened, I called her, she was asleep and I was told to call back later, so about that time when I was about to call her back I was on MSN and she logged on saying "Hurry!"

I told her about how I felt when she walked right by me (not mentioning the guy she was walking with) she told me "She didnt see me", I told her "I dont think so, I was only about less than a foot away from you, I felt like I did something wrong". She said sorry, now of course I took this very painfully but I told her this, "next time I see you, and you walk right by me, Im going to tackle ya" she said "ok".

Then today I saw her again, she began to walk by me with the same guy, NOTE: SHE IS NOT DATING HIM! THERE IS NO RELATIONSHIP THERE, SHE IS TALKING TO OTHER GUYS AS I DO WITH OTHER GIRLS ON A CASUAL BASIS, AND THEY ARE ALSO IN THE SAME CLASS! Well anyway when I saw this I asked her "do I have to tackle you, or are you going to walk right on by?" she stuck her hand out, I held it while she walked by, and in her walk to continue forward I pulled her back to me, nearly 2 mins untill the bell was to ring for the 4th period. I began to walk up the steps with her (The other guy kept on walking) I thanked her for helping me with an assignment I was having difficulty with, I was constantly touching her shoulders and when I took her to her class I patted her on the head and said "good angie" and she laughed as I continued onward, she didnt hug me.

But me and her are friends now, and on a good basis of communication, but the phone calls arent still coming in, Im going to lay low on MSN and see if she will come to me, also it seems as though she has changed her route to see me before my 4th period starts, interesting eh?

Because we are friends I can drop the loving emotions on her at anytime, but Id still like to get the phone calls happening, along with more hugs. I plan on asking her to talk to me more.

Showing her that i want to speak to her, be with her, and hold her, will bring her to realize my caring. I plan to expose my thoughts to her soon, NOW: Although I am confused, I do know when to give up, if I show her how much I care, her reaction I will note very closely, if she is negative I will walk on.

Sincerely,

Adam

I got alot of homework to do.....later

[iluvspl]

well from reading what you readi would definitly say she wants ya back. It sounds like she misses you and wants you back. She remmbers what she had with you and wants that back. I would be confident but still stand guard just in case.