Cheating, Flirting, and JealousyBeing unfaithful to your significant other or suspect them of the same? Can't stand the way they flirt? Jealous? Discuss your experiences here.
Ok, so me and my boyfriend have been dating almost 3 years now. We met in one state (where I am from) while he was going to school. When he graduated we had only been dating about 6 monthes and I ended up moving back to his home town with him. I liked it here at first but its small and Im used to the city. Any, right now he is in jail, has been about a month and will be for another month. He didnt do anything theyre making him serve off his fines from a 04' DUI. Still, he does have a drinking problem and I think I do too so it causes alot of problems for us.
My closest friends / family are his family since mine is in a diff. state. A few weekends ago I went to a party with his sister (my bff) and his brother. Me and his brother are much closer in age than me and my boyfriend and I think we both always kinda had a thang. Anyway, somehow we ended up making out like all night. I felt bad the next day though.
Then, few weeks after that, I was having a party and he followed me into my room when I was getting something. He kept trying to kiss me n stuff and eventually I gave in. Just then, his SISTER walks in. Now, I seriously didnt think shed ever say anything in fear of ruining her brothers relationship forever. I recently had to kick her out of my house because she doesnt have a job and cant pay rent. She got mad and told HER MOM!
Her mom freaked out on me, and Im realizing really how big of a mistake it was. His brother, sister, and mom all say DONT TELL HIM! (he does have a bit of an anger problem) I feel like I need to go back home. I cant live with this forever. BUT my boyfriends in JAIL---how do I tell him that?!?!? If it was anyone else Id tell him the truth but I cant break up 2 brothers!!
WHAT DO I DO???? Why am I supposed to say Im leaving??? He will be heart broken if i leave (and angry) and he doesnt need that in jail..should I make an excuse and tell him the truth when he gets out despite what his family says? They r all ganging up on me. :/
Anyway, somehow we ended up making out like all night.
and he doesnt need that in jail..should I make an excuse and tell him the truth when he gets out despite what his family says? They r all ganging up on me. :/
This one is easy.
1. Stop minimizing. Boyfriend did do something - DUI. He is in jail for a reason. You did way more than kiss the brother - you were making out ALL NIGHT!
2. Don't date a guy in jail with a drinking and anger problem and a cute brother.
3. Who cares what you tell the guy in jail - he is a zero. Just get him out of your life.
4. Move out of that town. Wait maybe a year. Then put the moves on the brother. If you are lucky, he will follow you to that new town you are going to pick out - where you can get a well paying job and get on with your life.
First the advice above is good except for point 4. which is terrible advice imo. The brother you made out with is just as bad if not worse than you. You both have absolutely no loyalty and you deserve each other if it were not for the fact that you will devastate this family. You should obviously not cheat if you are in a commited relationship. If you do decide to cheat pick someone who is not related to your partner! By cheating on this guy with his brother you are driving a wedge between them that will likely never be repaired.
Move away like a thief in the night and learn something from this mess you created! Don't worry about your boyfriend he may be hurt by you leaving and may never understand what happened but in the long run its a drop in the bucket compared to the amount of pain you will cause him by staying because you will probably end up cheating again and again. I just hope he has a small family!
Basically all of you are dead-beat scum. The only difference between this guy and any other drunk driver is he happened to get caught. The only reason he is in jail is because he couldn't afford to pay the fines, so he's paying them off through jail time. NEVER cheat on somebody with a family member, if you feel like you have to cheat. I feel no sympathy for you or anyone else in this story.
NEVER cheat on somebody with a family member, if you feel like you have to cheat.
Cheaters often go for the convenient close person, because at heart they are lazy. If they had initiative, they would have gotten out of the relationship.
that is how the whole best friend/husband triangle starts up. Laziness to be honest. Oh, you're at the house anyways. Let's sneak off into the bathroom. Easy. They are lazy.
Come on, his brother?? No matter what, he's eventually going to find out. I mean, three people know about it and they are all family members. Someone's going to tell eventually.
I agree with the poster who said to stop minimizing. Yes, he did do something -- driving drunk is serious.
I think you probably should move. It doesn't sound like this is a healthy environment for you. He has a drinking problem AND an anger problem. You think you have a drinking problem too -- you two are going to reinforce each other's problems. And what is he going to do when he gets out of jail and discovers you made out with his brother?? And what kind of brother is this guy anyway? I think you should move back to the city. This whole thing sounds kind of tawdry.
Ok, so me and my boyfriend have been dating almost 3 years now. We met in one state (where I am from) while he was going to school. When he graduated we had only been dating about 6 monthes and I ended up moving back to his home town with him. I liked it here at first but its small and Im used to the city. Any, right now he is in jail, has been about a month and will be for another month. He didnt do anything theyre making him serve off his fines from a 04' DUI. Still, he does have a drinking problem and I think I do too so it causes alot of problems for us.
My closest friends / family are his family since mine is in a diff. state. A few weekends ago I went to a party with his sister (my bff) and his brother. Me and his brother are much closer in age than me and my boyfriend and I think we both always kinda had a thang. Anyway, somehow we ended up making out like all night. I felt bad the next day though.
Then, few weeks after that, I was having a party and he followed me into my room when I was getting something. He kept trying to kiss me n stuff and eventually I gave in. Just then, his SISTER walks in. Now, I seriously didnt think shed ever say anything in fear of ruining her brothers relationship forever. I recently had to kick her out of my house because she doesnt have a job and cant pay rent. She got mad and told HER MOM!
Her mom freaked out on me, and Im realizing really how big of a mistake it was. His brother, sister, and mom all say DONT TELL HIM! (he does have a bit of an anger problem) I feel like I need to go back home. I cant live with this forever. BUT my boyfriends in JAIL---how do I tell him that?!?!? If it was anyone else Id tell him the truth but I cant break up 2 brothers!!
WHAT DO I DO???? Why am I supposed to say Im leaving??? He will be heart broken if i leave (and angry) and he doesnt need that in jail..should I make an excuse and tell him the truth when he gets out despite what his family says? They r all ganging up on me. :/
Well when you kick your Boyfriends Sister out of your house after making out with your Boyfriends Brother on at least two occasions what do you expect, Einstein? You are shocked she would tell her mom? DUH!
Don't worry, it's quite likely that he will figure this out when he gets out. Or it is more likely that he will be told by one of the family members, and rightly so
Part of being an adult(or claiming to be one) is taking responsibility for our actions. Drunk or not, you are a terrible GF and He is a terrible brother.
But the way these things always seem to pan out, it will be blood is thicker than water, so regardless of the truth this one will be on you in their eyes.
Just a word of advice out of genuine concern for you however....If and when you move away please do not move back to the same place or part of the big city where you met him. I say that because he will know exactly where to look, and you just can never be sure if your "slipping out of town like a thief in the night" combined with his foul temper will trigger him looking you up sometime. Because guys who just get out of jail do not take this kind of news with an "oh well" attitude.
Then, few weeks after that, I was having a party and he followed me into my room when I was getting something. He kept trying to kiss me n stuff and eventually I gave in.
wow, thats all it takes with you eh? just be persistent? you just "gave in" huh?
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Just then, his SISTER walks in. Now, I seriously didnt think shed ever say anything in fear of ruining her brothers relationship forever. I recently had to kick her out of my house because she doesnt have a job and cant pay rent. She got mad and told HER MOM!
good
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Her mom freaked out on me
well of course she did, what did you expect? how do you think you will feel if your son someday is being cheated on, you gonna give his cheating gf a hug?
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His brother, sister, and mom all say DONT TELL HIM! (he does have a bit of an anger problem) I feel like I need to go back home. I cant live with this forever. BUT my boyfriends in JAIL---how do I tell him that?!?!? If it was anyone else Id tell him the truth but I cant break up 2 brothers!!
you should have thought about that before you "gave in". and if that is how his brother is, I'd disown him anyway. not much of a brother, so nothing to really break up.
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WHAT DO I DO???? Why am I supposed to say Im leaving??? He will be heart broken if i leave (and angry) and he doesnt need that in jail..should I make an excuse and tell him the truth when he gets out despite what his family says? They r all ganging up on me. :/
whatever you do, just break up with him. you can give him whatever excuse you want so as to save face, but eventually someone in the family WILL tell him.
keep quite until bf's outta jail,what he did was wrong. but why make his life harder than it is. wait till he's out then tell him what a schmuck you are.
He will be heart broken if i leave (and angry) and he doesnt need that in jail..should I make an excuse and tell him the truth when he gets out despite what his family says? They r all ganging up on me. :/
I'd say just stay there and make peace with your bf, he is about to get out anyway because a DUI is not that bad.
There is no way that he is not going to find out. There are too many people that know so maybe it's better if you tell him.
If it's true you didn't have sex it should be fine.
If you plan on telling your jailed boyfriend about it, do so only after he gets out of jail and make sure he's in a calm mood. I think you should break up with your boyfriend, he does sounds like an alcoholic loser. What person drives drunk??
Yes you cheated but it's more concerning your boyfriend's drinking and anger problems, not a good sign...
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