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I can not attract women.


In Search Of... Having a hard time forming friendships or finding companions, lovers, or associates? Is someone pursuing an unwelcome relationship with you? Talk about your experiences here.

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Old 26th October 2009, 5:22 PM   #16
dell00
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hello.

Looks:
Its pretty clear that your not brad pitt or will smith; but I wouldn't classify you as ugly. Ugly is repulsive, and i think that should be reserved for a whole different level of looks. You could come across as a bit nerdy with the glasses, current hair and tie/coat combo (if you wear that too often, but you've said you wear diff stuff so thats ok).

Listen to the pretty lady with the awesome username and to island girl (and to pedigree for the mental punt kick).

Change your hairstyle, i think it could do a world of difference to your overall look. You don't look too bad with the hotdog on your head in pic 3, because it adds, i dunno, mass(??) to the top of your head. Lots of people use their hair (shorter or longer) to cover up their head shape and ears. No harm.

I think there are some sites or programs that let you experiment with pics and hairstyles, try them out and you could even show them to someone who you are genuinely comfortable with and get their advice on a look.

You could also change your glasses, that may work too.

Consider developing your physique for the standard stuff if you feel thats lacking (broad shoulders in relation to your waist, not skinny arms, no pencil neck).

I wouldn't consider going out with you either, but thats because im a straight guy.

Friends and Family:
They will always say you are nice and sweet and what not --- unless you are a total d*ck to them. Also they see you a lot, so their familiarity with your face is different to that of the person you describe as the "new girl".

Standards and no attrraction to black women:
Most of them are reasonable, but the boob thing and the cleanliness thing.
I dont know how the boob thing is relevant is to your dating life rejections (unless you specify that to your dates, which would be awkward).
The cleanliness thing, ive never met any girl socially or at work who is not clean or doesnt wear clean clothes, so i cant relate.

Maybe you are going overboard with the slender and fat distinction. Theres loads in between, maybe you should aim for that.

What im basically trying to say is that if you are only hitting on the new on the scene, but popular, fashionable, white, potential bikini models at school or social occasions....well, you know your strike rate on that.

On a closing note, and i don't intent to dampen your confidence; but you should consider if you are a bit too overconfident and in your face about yourself and your personality. I don't know if you are, but some parts of your post suggest this. Apologies if this offends you.

BTW, odds are that you will find someone eventually and while she wont match all your standards she will be a fit; i hope its sooner rather than later.
At your age, looks will occupy a good chunk of the decision to date/not date. This will change as you and your potential dates age and seek different things from partners (it wont go away unless you are filthy filthy rich, but it will come down in weightage as a factor).

G'luck and keep your confidence up. You've said you have a great life apart from this, enjoy those things until this one element gets sorted out.
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Old 26th October 2009, 11:52 PM   #17
Disillusioned
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Franklin,
Why worry about it??? When I got tired of all the rejection, I bought my Realdoll. It was a decision I never regretted.

Now when some woman starts asking me why I never got married, never fathered a couple of retards, etc etc, I just start telling her about my Realdoll. It's pretty damn funny to watch these women get all flustered and defensive... but hey, they did it to themselves by withholding love and I don't feel sorry for them.
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Old 27th October 2009, 8:51 AM   #18
gypsy_nicky
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your actually average but you play down your looks.

About the ears, you could either get them surgically modified to not stick out or you could use your hair. Grow somewhat of a short afro or I think dreadlocks would be even better.

Lose the glasses or choose one that does not look nerdy on you. Doesnt matter what style but it has to look good on you.
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Old 27th October 2009, 10:48 AM   #19
Ross PK
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Disillusioned View Post
Franklin,
Why worry about it??? When I got tired of all the rejection, I bought my Realdoll. It was a decision I never regretted.

Now when some woman starts asking me why I never got married, never fathered a couple of retards, etc etc, I just start telling her about my Realdoll. It's pretty damn funny to watch these women get all flustered and defensive... but hey, they did it to themselves by withholding love and I don't feel sorry for them.
Love your post. Awsome.
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Old 27th October 2009, 1:52 PM   #20
RATED-RKOFRANKLIN
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dell00 View Post
hello.

Looks:
Its pretty clear that your not brad pitt or will smith; but I wouldn't classify you as ugly. Ugly is repulsive, and i think that should be reserved for a whole different level of looks. You could come across as a bit nerdy with the glasses, current hair and tie/coat combo (if you wear that too often, but you've said you wear diff stuff so thats ok).

Listen to the pretty lady with the awesome username and to island girl (and to pedigree for the mental punt kick).

Change your hairstyle, i think it could do a world of difference to your overall look. You don't look too bad with the hotdog on your head in pic 3, because it adds, i dunno, mass(??) to the top of your head. Lots of people use their hair (shorter or longer) to cover up their head shape and ears. No harm.

I think there are some sites or programs that let you experiment with pics and hairstyles, try them out and you could even show them to someone who you are genuinely comfortable with and get their advice on a look.

You could also change your glasses, that may work too.

Consider developing your physique for the standard stuff if you feel thats lacking (broad shoulders in relation to your waist, not skinny arms, no pencil neck).

I wouldn't consider going out with you either, but thats because im a straight guy.

Friends and Family:
They will always say you are nice and sweet and what not --- unless you are a total d*ck to them. Also they see you a lot, so their familiarity with your face is different to that of the person you describe as the "new girl".

Standards and no attrraction to black women:
Most of them are reasonable, but the boob thing and the cleanliness thing.
I dont know how the boob thing is relevant is to your dating life rejections (unless you specify that to your dates, which would be awkward).
The cleanliness thing, ive never met any girl socially or at work who is not clean or doesnt wear clean clothes, so i cant relate.

Maybe you are going overboard with the slender and fat distinction. Theres loads in between, maybe you should aim for that.

What im basically trying to say is that if you are only hitting on the new on the scene, but popular, fashionable, white, potential bikini models at school or social occasions....well, you know your strike rate on that.

On a closing note, and i don't intent to dampen your confidence; but you should consider if you are a bit too overconfident and in your face about yourself and your personality. I don't know if you are, but some parts of your post suggest this. Apologies if this offends you.

BTW, odds are that you will find someone eventually and while she wont match all your standards she will be a fit; i hope its sooner rather than later.
At your age, looks will occupy a good chunk of the decision to date/not date. This will change as you and your potential dates age and seek different things from partners (it wont go away unless you are filthy filthy rich, but it will come down in weightage as a factor).

G'luck and keep your confidence up. You've said you have a great life apart from this, enjoy those things until this one element gets sorted out.
I don't wear suits everyday. I only wear sites at funerals, church, weddings, etc. My picture in the brown suit is my senior picture two years ago. The green suit was for homecoming in high school two years ago.

I will be getting new glasses soon.

I don't reject women base on their breast size. I have seen girls who are not clean in public, and I will not give them the time of day. The girl can not be fat. I am in shape and take of myself so I expect the same from her.

Thanks for the response

Quote:
Originally Posted by gypsy_nicky View Post
your actually average but you play down your looks.

About the ears, you could either get them surgically modified to not stick out or you could use your hair. Grow somewhat of a short afro or I think dreadlocks would be even better.

Lose the glasses or choose one that does not look nerdy on you. Doesnt matter what style but it has to look good on you.
I will not get surgery for my ears. I want someone to love me for who I am. If she can not accept me now then she does not truly love me.

Thanks for the response
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Old 27th October 2009, 3:01 PM   #21
betamanlet
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Disillusioned View Post
Franklin,
Why worry about it??? When I got tired of all the rejection, I bought my Realdoll. It was a decision I never regretted.

Now when some woman starts asking me why I never got married, never fathered a couple of retards, etc etc, I just start telling her about my Realdoll. It's pretty damn funny to watch these women get all flustered and defensive... but hey, they did it to themselves by withholding love and I don't feel sorry for them.

I hope you're trolling about the realdoll.
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Old 27th October 2009, 3:04 PM   #22
limitless
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OK I am a guy and here are my tips. You said you have sensitive eyes but I definitely still recommend contacts. Get over it and wear some contacts at least once in a while. Or wear them when you go out. And yah you need glasses that fit you. It sits way too low and too big.

As for what you wear, your suit is way too baggy. I am assuming some of your other cloths will fit like that as well. You need cloths that fit. As in the seam of the shirt sits right on the corner bone of your shoulder. Your pants also need to fit better. You look like a skinny guy and wearing baggy cloths does not help you. It makes you look less confident and less stylish. When I say fit I do not necessarily mean tight like skinny jeans and some skin tight t-shirt. The key is that it fits and not baggy.
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Old 27th October 2009, 3:13 PM   #23
RATED-RKOFRANKLIN
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Originally Posted by limitless View Post
OK I am a guy and here are my tips. You said you have sensitive eyes but I definitely still recommend contacts. Get over it and wear some contacts at least once in a while. Or wear them when you go out. And yah you need glasses that fit you. It sits way too low and too big.

As for what you wear, your suit is way too baggy. I am assuming some of your other cloths will fit like that as well. You need cloths that fit. As in the seam of the shirt sits right on the corner bone of your shoulder. Your pants also need to fit better. You look like a skinny guy and wearing baggy cloths does not help you. It makes you look less confident and less stylish. When I say fit I do not necessarily mean tight like skinny jeans and some skin tight t-shirt. The key is that it fits and not baggy.
My glasses are not low on my face. My glasses are up on my nose. I can not wear contacts. My eyes are way too sensitive. I am not going to wear something that will give me pain. What picture are you looking at? I no longer have the glasses in the picture where I am wearing a brown suit. My current glasses are the pair with my green suit.

Excuse you. My clothes are not baggy. My clothes fit on my body.
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Old 27th October 2009, 3:32 PM   #24
limitless
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I am just trying to help but if you disagree with me that's fine.

In the first two pictures with you in a suit, you have glasses on. Your eyes are at the top edge of the lens almost in line with the top frame. This means your glasses sit too low. Your eyes should be closer to the center of the lens. You can simply fix this problem by going to the eye doctor and tell them you want it sit higher. The glasses are almost literally resting on your nostrils. You can search online and look at images of people wearing glasses. First it should not sit on your nostril and second the eye should not be so close to the top edge of the lens.

For the same two photos of you in suits, your suit just looks like it is sagging on the shoulder. That's why I said it was baggy. It looks too big for you. You can also search online on suits and see how other people wear them.
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Old 27th October 2009, 4:11 PM   #25
RATED-RKOFRANKLIN
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Quote:
Originally Posted by limitless View Post
I am just trying to help but if you disagree with me that's fine.

In the first two pictures with you in a suit, you have glasses on. Your eyes are at the top edge of the lens almost in line with the top frame. This means your glasses sit too low. Your eyes should be closer to the center of the lens. You can simply fix this problem by going to the eye doctor and tell them you want it sit higher. The glasses are almost literally resting on your nostrils. You can search online and look at images of people wearing glasses. First it should not sit on your nostril and second the eye should not be so close to the top edge of the lens.

For the same two photos of you in suits, your suit just looks like it is sagging on the shoulder. That's why I said it was baggy. It looks too big for you. You can also search online on suits and see how other people wear them.
Sorry about getting upset about the glasses. You are right my glasses were way too low in the picture, I should have pushed them up. Here is a more recenty picture of me with my current pair on. My eyes are in the center of the frame. http://s210.photobucket.com/albums/b...t=LastScan.jpg

My clothes are baggy. My clothes are the right size. My suits are not sagging on the shoulder.
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Old 27th October 2009, 5:04 PM   #26
axisdenied
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Sometimes when I try to meet a new girl, she gives me a negative facial expression. She makes an ugly face like "hey back off" or "is this guy really trying to talk to me?". I am not hitting on her. I am just trying to have casual conversation.

In school girls sometimes like to rate guys. Who is cute, sexy, hot, average, nerdy, or just plain ugly. I always ended up on the ugly rating from every girl.


I took a look at your photos. You are not "ugly." Your look in the face can be changed with some superficial adjustments (glasses, hair, etc), but constant rejection is usually not symptomatic of being physically unattractive.

How are you approaching these women? do you have anything in common with them? do you take a class together and then approach asking questions about the lecture or the homework? what exactly do you mean by "casual conversation?"

I'm trying to get you to think about how you're interacting with these women. If you are approaching random thin, large-breasted women who aren't in any of your classes or know any of your friends, you're probably going to be out of luck in the dating department. The women you describe as preferred are the ones who are relentlessly pursued by men all the time. It is understandable if they're used to playing defensively. So, tell us, what exactly are you doing to attract these women to your personality?
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Old 27th October 2009, 5:35 PM   #27
RATED-RKOFRANKLIN
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Originally Posted by axisdenied View Post
Sometimes when I try to meet a new girl, she gives me a negative facial expression. She makes an ugly face like "hey back off" or "is this guy really trying to talk to me?". I am not hitting on her. I am just trying to have casual conversation.

In school girls sometimes like to rate guys. Who is cute, sexy, hot, average, nerdy, or just plain ugly. I always ended up on the ugly rating from every girl.


I took a look at your photos. You are not "ugly." Your look in the face can be changed with some superficial adjustments (glasses, hair, etc), but constant rejection is usually not symptomatic of being physically unattractive.

How are you approaching these women? do you have anything in common with them? do you take a class together and then approach asking questions about the lecture or the homework? what exactly do you mean by "casual conversation?"

I'm trying to get you to think about how you're interacting with these women. If you are approaching random thin, large-breasted women who aren't in any of your classes or know any of your friends, you're probably going to be out of luck in the dating department. The women you describe as preferred are the ones who are relentlessly pursued by men all the time. It is understandable if they're used to playing defensively. So, tell us, what exactly are you doing to attract these women to your personality?
I don't approach random girls. Most girls I have asked out were in my classes. Not all of them are large breasted women.

My casual conversation when meeting a new girl in class is mainly discussing something about the class rather it is the work, teacher, or students. It is not a long discussion just a short chat. Depending on the girl and her attitude I might try to start a friendship. I will ask her "how are you" to start a conversation. If she told me about she was going to a concert, I'll ask her "how was it" after she went to the concert. I listen to women when they speak, and I rarely forget anything. Some girls are surprised that I remember the things they tell me. I also talk about things we have in the common.

For example and this really happen.
I met this cute girl in my math class. The first time we talked it was about the class, and I introduced myself. We set next to each other everyday. Before class we would talk about our day, her life in Germany, the class if she wanted my notes, her hobbies, we both liked football and basketball, etc. We were really cool friends. I have not had her in any other classes and this was last year.
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Old 27th October 2009, 5:44 PM   #28
Ross PK
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I agree, his suits do look like they're too big for him. I wouldn't say baggy though because there's a difference between something being baggy and something being too big.
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Old 27th October 2009, 5:59 PM   #29
axisdenied
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That sounds good. What about your friends? do you have a supportive network of people on or around campus who can lead you to others? it is good to get out with people who know you well to show your potentials how well liked you are by others.
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Old 27th October 2009, 6:15 PM   #30
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Originally Posted by Ross PK View Post
I agree, his suits do look like they're too big for him. I wouldn't say baggy though because there's a difference between something being baggy and something being too big.
My clothes are not too big.

Quote:
Originally Posted by axisdenied View Post
That sounds good. What about your friends? do you have a supportive network of people on or around campus who can lead you to others? it is good to get out with people who know you well to show your potentials how well liked you are by others.
Yes, I hangout at the Student Center on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.
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