Truly there are few things that can equal the emotional pain and distress this causes.
I don't know if deep down there is a part of me that enjoys torturing myself because I always fall for girls I cannot have.
Once, just once I'd like to fall for a girl I have even a remote chance of getting together with.
I thought I'd gotten this under control because it's been a few years now since I felt anything like this for a girl but it's happened to me again and I need to get it off my chest because I feel like there's a fist in my chest crushing my heart every time I think of her.
I'm in a choir with this girl, so I see her almost every week and it's agony. She's in the row in front of me and I have to tear my eyes away from her time and time again.
To see something you want more than anything else, right in front of you but completely unattainable, it's a horrible feeling. Even worse is the knowledge that some other guy(s) will get to be with her, it just feels so unfair.
I wish that I could have my emotions switched off so that I don't ever need to experience this again.
Apologies for the depressing thread, but I'm close to tears. I'm normally really good at controlling my emotions because I know that when they get out they overwhelm me, like what is happening now.
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