[WhomiHide]

that is my problem. i have developed a low self esteem. Man, this girl totally, looking back now, took a lot out of me and somtimes i feel as if i deserved it cause i let her walk all over me. i would surrender what i wanted so that she maybe happy. She would never stick up for me, just let her friends think i am stupid because i dont like conversating with them about their important topics.

i did my best, i am still in love with here. she did make me happy, but i can't help but to think that me self esteem destroyed us. who wants to be with someone with no backbone, but i must be honest and not hard on myself she did/said things to make me feel like ****.

the problem is, i can't move out, i have no where to go. i am eager to know what others have done to either win back their ex with more confident and higher self esteem, or to just let her have her space.

she always wants space, and then come back even when she says she will never, now we live together.
before we broke up she started to talk to someone over the phone at work. it was an old fling. the day they spoke we fought, i couldn' tolerate her talking to someone at work.why?
1.because its only at work they talk, makes the brain and heart think why only at work? hmm...
2.she broke up with me and dated this person, they dated and i came back to her when she was all finish.

we fought about that person, and then i said to her that i think it is over cause you won't stop it! she then said fine, i was unhappy anway...??!!!

what does that mean......wth it turned around but i did it cause i finally wanted to stand up for myself
then, now its been two months, and she acts as if she doesn't care we just ended a 4 year relationship.
i play those stupid songs about im mocing on and she shows no emotions. she is not even sad. wth. she locks herself in her room cause i took the living room. even after we broke up, we slept in the same bed, now i am on a futon!! gesh! and on top of that she still kissess, infact i went out today without saying anything, she called me and i didn't pick up, i didn't want to. when i got back home, whe was all about where i was and gavea me a hug. why?????

she said she was unhappy and needed space cause it keeps coming back, which is true cause she always says she needs space. but why....? and then come back to me crying and wanting me back! wth is this all about?

i am in love and confused.
she wrote me letter saying she will marry me and love me always. and that how she beleive i am the ONE for her and i will ALways be, now i read them i and hate her more cause she makes me feel those words are real. but if seh feels that way and that was just half a year ago, then how could she be so happy about is breaking up.
does she not know that now we are not together and not going to be. does she not think i am of value or worth?

im in dire need of some self respect check! i always have to fight to get to know her or tlak to her,
we have different communication styles but i know she doesn't respect me. and the only reason i think why is because i always let her have her way....

what do you think? how should i conduct myself so she knows i am moving on so she can wake up or let this whole 4 years die.

what should I do for now...until we move out and do our own thing. she told me that she was unhappy. but i thought she was while we were together, i ask her and she would say yes....

whats going on with her!!!
she is so confusing...i need help to understand this, and what should i do so she knows i don't need her and yes i am strong not weak because i had low esteem!!!!