[yuv]

hi folks, i started the thread at:
http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t59303/
(if you have a look, please read everything, don't skip, or you will probably get the wrong idea. also keep in mind that moose's 3/24 post is a reply to another user's reply, not ot my post).

last night i suggested marriage counseling to my wife. she didn't like the idea of "paying a stranger to tell us what we're doing wrong and what to do right." she also asked if we could wait until we're married a year and try to work this out by ourselves (we have been married 6 months). i explained that i didn't want to wait because i believe in a strong marriage and want to work on problems, and that a licensed professional would add structure to our discussion, not "tell us what to do."

i was already building plenty of negative feelings and am feeling better now that we're going to counseling at some point, but i am starting to worry about the outcome. has anyone ever heard of counseling making things worse? if i am asked to talk about something she wouldn't want brought up, for example, or maybe the therapist makes suggestions and my wife might give "see, she tried to tell us what to do" as a reason not to go, and just be angry about it.

these are just examples. i have no idea. if things must continue this way, this isn't the marriage for me, so i need to try _something_. as LucreziaBorgia pointed out, "It needs to be working for both partners."

any feedback about counseling pro or con or suggestions are welcome...