[CharlesDarwin]

Originally Posted by carhill

OP, I do feel for you, but, in that particular kind of pissing match with a woman, you will almost always lose.

Did she really say she wanted to marry you to 'hold onto you'? I ask because, to me, that statement was loaded with power for you to retain the status quo. What exactly 'spooked' you?

Do you fear marriage in general or was it just with her?

If she came back to you tomorrow, what would change?

I feel like I have changed, I got spooked because I felt like if I got married that young that I would miss out on alot of things in my life, that I would never get the chance to go be stupid with my friends etc. But after being with out her for even a few days I realised what a monumental mistake I had made, that my time with her meant more to me than anything else in the world.

I realise that nothing in the world could match what I have lost by what I have done

I think the biggest thing that would change is that I would be far more willing to openly communicate my feelings and fears to her.

The biggest thing that spooked me though was when we first started dating in HS, she dumped mr 5 times. then we got back together, all with in 2 weeks of each other, the 5th time she dumped me, i was done and moved on. 8 months later she asked to have dinner with me and I agreed and we talked and I saw that she was a differant person and I forgave her, but didnt forget.

Well when she felt me starting to pull away, she told me if i didnt marry her soon that she was leaving, and it brought back all kinds of old emotions and made me feel like i had been duped that she was really no different and that made me pull inward even more.