Cheating, Flirting, and JealousyBeing unfaithful to your significant other or suspect them of the same? Can't stand the way they flirt? Jealous? Discuss your experiences here.
So my bf and I have been on and off for the past 3 and a half years. I love him alot and i know that he loves me too. Right now we are on our 4th break.(I know its crazy). Anyways i met his childhood best friend last summer and we quicky became friends. We would call each other but it was always really innocent. I even tried hooking him out wit one of my girls. My bf doesnt always treat me the way he should and I always found comfort in his friend if my girls werent available to talk. Last fri after the 3 of us hung out he invited me over to his house to have a beer. He said he wanted to talk so I gave him a chance.He was very flirty and the next day I couldnt stop thinking about him. We then hung out on Monday and we ended up kissing. We also hung out Tues. and WEds. He's the sweetest guy and he really wants to be with me. He told me that its my decision if I want to continue seeing him or not b/c right now he's in California. When he comes back I have to make a decesion. What makes it so hard is because he's the sweetest guy and we have a connection. We know that we shouldnt be seeing each other because him and my "bf" have been friends since middle school. I really dont know what to do and he doesnt either.I really need outside advice from ppl besides my friends so if everyone can give me some feedback I would really appreciate it
Thanks...
The guy is trying for an easy hook up. You are putting too much credit into his words. People who go after their life long friends SO do not think in the future, they think in the present. He is looking for action. You need to learn that men who listen while you are down really want to hook up with you. If your bf is that bad and you guys are always breaking up you should end it for good but not for the friend. Get rid of both of them. Lastly tell your BF about his "friend".
Start clean and work on yourself before you put yourself in a horrible mess
The guy is trying for an easy hook up. You are putting too much credit into his words. People who go after their life long friends SO do not think in the future, they think in the present. He is looking for action. You need to learn that men who listen while you are down really want to hook up with you. If your bf is that bad and you guys are always breaking up you should end it for good but not for the friend. Get rid of both of them. Lastly tell your BF about his "friend".
Start clean and work on yourself before you put yourself in a horrible mess
I disagree partly with the bold quote. I was friends with this guy once, (we met on holiday). Something tragic happened, I was so down, he was there for me, listened to me, we never hooked up. He said he wanted to, but had too much respect for me. It's entirely possible he's listening because he cares, course, it's also possible he's not.
The guy is trying for an easy hook up. You are putting too much credit into his words. People who go after their life long friends SO do not think in the future, they think in the present. He is looking for action. You need to learn that men who listen while you are down really want to hook up with you. If your bf is that bad and you guys are always breaking up you should end it for good but not for the friend. Get rid of both of them. Lastly tell your BF about his "friend".
Start clean and work on yourself before you put yourself in a horrible mess
Let me guess tami,the guy you cheated with was there to listen right?
harmfulsweetz, it doesn't always lead to hooking up but that doesn't mean that the majority of the time they don't want to. Even in your case your friend flat out told he wanted to. Haven't you notice that most affairs start with a guy listing to a frustrated housewife, and some how he "understands" what shes going through
Let me guess tami,the guy you cheated with was there to listen right?
Actually, NO ....I met my xOM/MM (now divorced) more than a decade after my D-day....AND I did not really talk to him about my stbxh's shenanigans-just that our marriage was not conventional. I wasn't unhappy with my "marriage". What I could give in the marriage was something I chose. So no, my dear, my xOM was not my sounding board about my marriage.
I disagree partly with the bold quote. I was friends with this guy once, (we met on holiday). Something tragic happened, I was so down, he was there for me, listened to me, we never hooked up. He said he wanted to, but had too much respect for me. It's entirely possible he's listening because he cares, course, it's also possible he's not.
Okay, NO. NO. and NO. He did want to screw you. He only told you he didn't want to to seem more of a sweetheart to you, bettering his chances of YOU wanting to **** HIM. Come on........ *face in palm*
Okay, NO. NO. and NO. He did want to screw you. He only told you he didn't want to to seem more of a sweetheart to you, bettering his chances of YOU wanting to **** HIM. Come on........ *face in palm*
LOL..."face in palm"....<sigh> games people play, eh?
To be fair to him, he had plenty of opportunity, I certainly made it clear I wanted to and he still didn't. My point is, that although he wanted to, he didn't. He listened because he cared, looked after me because he cared. It's a cynical world when a man cannot care for a woman and listen to a woman when in need without wanting to screw her. No offence. He made his position and feelings on me clear, but he never breached it. He listened all the time. I'm not saying it's commonplace, it's not, most men are just there for what they can get, but not all. And I'm not going to be persuaded otherwise, there are decent men out there.
OP, I answered your multiple post on this topic on OW/OM. As Carhill noted, you need a big whoa! on the whole situation. Way too much drama, for way too long.
I'm not sure if you are trying to woo the friend away from your BF since you have felt so left out of their friendship and been so jealous of the friend, but at the end of the day, you are going to be without both of them.
Harmful, If this guy is such a straight up sort, why hasn't he told his "friend", that he is interested in the "friends", GF.? BTW if you were such a good person, why haven't YOU told your BF, the truth?
So my bf and I have been on and off for the past 3 and a half years. I love him alot and i know that he loves me too. Right now we are on our 4th break.(I know its crazy). Anyways i met his childhood best friend last summer and we quicky became friends. We would call each other but it was always really innocent. I even tried hooking him out wit one of my girls. My bf doesnt always treat me the way he should and I always found comfort in his friend if my girls werent available to talk. Last fri after the 3 of us hung out he invited me over to his house to have a beer. He said he wanted to talk so I gave him a chance.He was very flirty and the next day I couldnt stop thinking about him. We then hung out on Monday and we ended up kissing. We also hung out Tues. and WEds. He's the sweetest guy and he really wants to be with me. He told me that its my decision if I want to continue seeing him or not b/c right now he's in California. When he comes back I have to make a decesion. What makes it so hard is because he's the sweetest guy and we have a connection. We know that we shouldnt be seeing each other because him and my "bf" have been friends since middle school. I really dont know what to do and he doesnt either.I really need outside advice from ppl besides my friends so if everyone can give me some feedback I would really appreciate it
Thanks...
You're falling into a bad trap,
How would you feel if your best friend (a female) was befriend by boyfriend and he confided in her instead of you? How would you feel if on a, 'break' your ex-boyfriend kissed her and was considering dating her instead of you? What if all this was going on behind your back and you only found out because your now ex-boyfriend told you, he was now with your friend?
My ex girlfriend and I were also having problems. My friend for about 18 years and my girlfriend became friends because her and I would go to his apt sometimes, hang out for a bit and leave. They would also talk on the phone . My friend I guess was there for her in stead of her talking to me about things. Looking back at this it may seem innocent but some time between july and september things changed. They decided to get together behind my back . And now they are togther.I'm a big believer in not dating , cheating with friends of ex boyfriends / girlfriends. Especialy in the way you are talking. You are going to ruin a friendship. Do you want to know you have caused pain for someone you care about Most of these problems are because of bad communication. I for instance would get a little upset when my girl would talk about things that were bothering her, and I would be less than supportive . A big mistake for me There are some guys who do have ulterior motives. The smart ones do . In my case my friend is sort of dumb ,but looking back he may have known exactly what hes doing. He really is a user and I should have known not to trust him . Thats a red flag when a friend is the confidant. From now on I dont have my girlfriends be friends with any one I know ever again .Dont do it if you love the boyfriend . Just get away.
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Im falling for the best friend!!!
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