[MikeShivar]

I am a father, of a son, whome I love with all of my heart. Even though I try my hardest,a nd state that I love my son quite frequently, and have changed my whole life for him, I apparently am not a good father, or so his mother says.

She is planning on changing my son's last name to hers, if she can, and let me let you know, I have never been more furious about anything in my entire life. You are ridiculously petty if you seriously plan on changing your child's name just because you have a problem with the father. It seems to me, like my ex, you are superimposing your problems with him(either because you trully still miss him, or you two dont get along) on your child.

This will only serve to ruin yoru child, and noone else, remember this if anything, you will hurt her because of this, I can guarantee you this, and you'll make the father feel even less connected to her, which could possibly ruin her relationship with her father in the future.

No matter how much you may wish that your new husband was the Father of your child, he cannot, and will not, ever be her biological father, whether you change her name or not, and he will never have the relationship with her that her real father can give to her.

I know this as my father was never there for me my entire life, and veen though I had a great stepdad, who taught me much better lessons in life, my relationship with him is still nothing compared to that of me and my dad(Who mind you was a raging alcohalic who beat my mother and my brother and myself). My mother never changed my last name, and I wonder why? Because she respected my father enough to know, I was his son, and he wanted me to have his last name. You see with men our last names mean a huge amount to us, its almost like say you inherit your green eyes from your parents, or your nice hair, its something your proud of.

Now picture this, as an example, if her hair were black, and you changed it to blonde, just because it was the fathers hair color. Its basically the same thing, you being petty just because your child's father isn't with you anymore and that upsets you, because, if it didn't upset you, you wouldn't want to change the child's name anywho, it wouldn't bother you.