[GrayClouds]

Originally Posted by seychelles

JaggedRoad: why does one feel empty inside? because it was all meaningless?

I should've added this to my original post, but the reason why I ask this question is because my ex and I just recently broke up 3 months ago because he feels like he has to chase game and experience other people. He's very vain, he knows he looks good and other girls look at him and he has this mentality that it won't be hard to get them. I feel that of all the reasons for us to break up (we had been together for three years and have been engaged), why does it have to be some dumb reason such as "I want to be with other girls because I know I'll satisfy them and I need that satisfaction."
I asked my original question because I want to know how he would feel after he's experienced other girls.

Sorry to say, he is likely to feel great. There are a good dieal of individuals how find that self esteem is highly connected to the conquest and sex is the proof. They get a rush from it until it gets boring and then on to the next conquest. Sex is not about building emotional intimacy but creating feelings of power and control. Real intimacy is boring, or worst, creates feeling of inadequacy and weakness so they turn to physical sex to get the allusion of intimacy.

His statement may sound dumb..."I want to be with other girls because I know I'll satisfy them and I need that satisfaction." But in fact it reveals much of what I state. It is not hard to read into that statement that he feels the constant need to prove his manliness. That being with just one women and making her happy does not give him enough confidence. He needs to prove it by level of quantity vs quality.

You also said he is very vain. (Why would you want to be with someone like that?). Is is becouse of his good looks? If mostly it is then it reinforces the point that to him external gratification is more important then internal satisfaction. Hence emotion intimcy is valued less then expternal proof of worth, as in many sex partners.

For you this is a wonederful insight to what you want and need. If you do not shair his perspective that tell you in the future you need to look for a partner that share your value of emotional intimacy. If that is the case consicer yourself lucky you have learn this now.