[1985]

i met my partner back when i was 17 years old, almost 18. My partner is 6 yrs older than me, and we didn't mind the age difference. We have been together for 6 yrs now and we also have a 2 yr old daughter.

My partner told me that before we met, he JUST got out of rehab for being addicted to coke. I was proud of him for doing so well with not doing the drugs,,,, or so i thought! I eventually found out that he was doing coke behind my back, we had several fights about him doing the drugs. Then he finally "twisted my rubber arm" and got me to do coke with him too. It was not my first time trying it, i had tried it once before and did not care for it at all. We both ended up doing coke once or twice in a year, and then we started once a month or so, and for the past year it has been more and more and more, to the point of him buying EVERY weekend, i know it is wrong, i don't want to continue this every weekend. He is the one who is buying it, or so he says that it was just given to him.
Ever since being with him, whenever i leave cash in my purse it just happens to go missing, or at least most of it does. I have a feeling that it is my partner who is taking the money,,, just the other weekend i gave him my bank card to take out $40 for me that way i would have the cash for our taxi ride home (we were drinking at a friends house). That night he bought more coke... a few days later i tried to use my bank card, but it wasn't working... i went to the bank and they told me that i had put an empty envelope in the bank machine to take out cash (which is fraud)!! i was sooo angry that he had done that to me... i feel like i can never trust him again, that is the second time that he has done that to me... oh, and lately our fights have been involving more name calling, like how i am a fat b!+ch, ohhh, and a slut,,, apparently i have the time to cheat on him!!

i want to stay with him because i don't want my daughter to grow up w/o a father and because i guess i still do love him, or at least the "old" him,,,, but i also do not need this kind of stuff in my life or my daughters life... i guess i am very confused on how to handle this situation