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How to disengage when the MM was a family friend

The Other Man / Woman The other side of the story: Support and discussion for those who find themselves involved with a committed partner.

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Old 30th January 2018, 2:01 AM   #16
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Location: Midwest USA
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Who decided to end this LTA and why? Mutual? If it truly was a mutual decision you have better odds of moving on. If MM were jealous bunny boiler you chances would be about zero. I hope you two are not only on the same page but on the same word in the same sentence.

It seems you and MM have mastered the art of cheating, lying and most importantly, silence. Do you honestly believe he’ll remain silent forever?

You have to ease away from MM and his BW. Decline some invitations for example. Will your H miss their company? Please tell us you don’t pretend to be best friends with BW. Does she suspect the LTA?

Start looking for a different job. At least you two lovebirds won’t be tempted on a daily basis

This mess is a three way disaster. Work, friends and kids. I don’t know how many other lives are entangled in this mess without their knowledge or approval. But it’s your burden to minimize the fallout.

Last edited by Bufo; 30th January 2018 at 2:03 AM.. Reason: Added last paragraph
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Old 30th January 2018, 2:05 AM   #17
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Posts: 3,639
Ya know - the first rule of engagement is:

Do NOT engage

Follow that rule and there's no issue.

Stop planning weekend social get togethers

Get a new job

And just say no to anyone that suggests you see him.

IF any interaction is necessary the ONLY answers need to be:

Yes or no

Nothing further than that.
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Old Yesterday, 10:10 AM   #18
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Things are likely to pick back up again if you stay in contact in anyway . Especially with men.. things are out of sight out of mind for them, so as long as he doesn't see you he may not contact you but when he does...

My situation is similar but we are not ending it, if you need to talk I'm here.
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