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The Other Man / Woman The other side of the story: Support and discussion for those who find themselves involved with a committed partner.

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Old 2nd January 2018, 8:06 AM   #31
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Not much to say except that I hope it works out for you.

Not sure I would ever trust a married man who professed his love to me three days in... No, actually - I KNOW, I would never trust a married man who I met online and professed his love so quickly. But, I do hope that you find some happiness.
I have to agree with Bailey B here. That's awfully fast for I love you. Take it from me, I have experienced it. Good luck to you.
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Old 3rd January 2018, 7:11 PM   #32
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i found out i am pregnant. about 6 weeks along only. it can only be his as i haven't had sex with my H for more than half a year.
Isn't this consummation?
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Old 3rd January 2018, 8:08 PM   #33
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Isn't this consummation?
Huh? Consummation is when you do, she says she hasn't for six months. Trying to figure out what you mean by your post. I must be missing something?
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Old 3rd January 2018, 8:13 PM   #34
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Best wishes for a healthy delivery
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Old 3rd January 2018, 8:58 PM   #35
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Isn't this consummation?
Good point. She doesn't say I've NEVER had sex with my husband.

Hmmmm. Strange.
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Old 3rd January 2018, 9:47 PM   #36
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Huh? Consummation is when you do, she says she hasn't for six months. Trying to figure out what you mean by your post. I must be missing something?
What I mean is that she wants an annulment based on the fact that she has not consummated her marriage. It looked to me like she had, but it had been 6 months ago. She couldn't be pregnant by HIM because they hadn't had sex in 1/2 year, so it had to be the OM. I don't think there is a time limit on it if you have had sexual intercourse with your H in the past.

But, IDK, I'm not a lawyer or a cleric.
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Old 3rd January 2018, 11:21 PM   #37
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What I mean is that she wants an annulment based on the fact that she has not consummated her marriage. It looked to me like she had, but it had been 6 months ago. She couldn't be pregnant by HIM because they hadn't had sex in 1/2 year, so it had to be the OM. I don't think there is a time limit on it if you have had sexual intercourse with your H in the past.

But, IDK, I'm not a lawyer or a cleric.
Thanks for taking the time to explain, Steen! Makes sense! I hadn't read the thread very well and missed some things.
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Old 3rd January 2018, 11:54 PM   #38
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Good point. She doesn't say I've NEVER had sex with my husband.

Hmmmm. Strange.
Consummation of marriage means you have had sex with your husband at least once.

Nonconsummation means you NEVER EVER did.

Wonder what she means???
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Old 4th January 2018, 6:30 AM   #39
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Probably what she means is that they haven't had sex in half a year, but she mentioned her marriage to her husband was short enough to qualify for an annulment. So my guess is that their marriage was less than six months along, that they had last slept together when they were engaged and not married. Hence, not consummated.
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Old 4th January 2018, 6:56 AM   #40
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Probably what she means is that they haven't had sex in half a year, but she mentioned her marriage to her husband was short enough to qualify for an annulment. So my guess is that their marriage was less than six months along, that they had last slept together when they were engaged and not married. Hence, not consummated.
Oh, so she got married when she was pregnant and having sex with MM and that's why she never slept with her husband maybe.
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Old 4th January 2018, 7:47 AM   #41
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So dad divorcing and breaking up his first child's family is
acting in the best interest of his child.

The way a dad treats his first child is an indication of how
he is going to treat his second child.
maybe, maybe not. neither is staying in an unhealthy marriage. the divorce takes 2 to agree. and the (ex) wife agreed because she knew the marriage was not normal for a long time. and the child sensed it from a younger age (they were asked by do they not sleep in same room when other parents does). then again you could have said ďthatís what he told uĒ, but whatever.

in any case you are right. and thatís the consequence i would bear and try my best to raise my child the best i could.
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Old 4th January 2018, 7:48 AM   #42
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Originally Posted by healing light View Post
Probably what she means is that they haven't had sex in half a year, but she mentioned her marriage to her husband was short enough to qualify for an annulment. So my guess is that their marriage was less than six months along, that they had last slept together when they were engaged and not married. Hence, not consummated.
this is correct. thanks for your logical answer and not jumping to conclusion.
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Old 4th January 2018, 8:01 AM   #43
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Oh, so she got married when she was pregnant and having sex with MM and that's why she never slept with her husband maybe.
i find it rather baffling how you came to this answer...
why would i still marry H intentionally after finding out iím pregnant by another man? i know iím supposed to be rather daft and evil as an ow and all.. but this non-consummation thing was verified and used by my attorney.

to clear things since everyone seems particular interested in whether my marriage was cosummated or not..
we dated for years and yes we had sex. we got married legally first half of 2017 as a procedural step for our housing (this is how it works- where iím from not in USA). we had not had sex since 3 months before the marriage. and before that it was another 6 months of no sex. maybe 4 times in 3 years. yes sounds ridiculous and yes i can remember it because it was so infrequent. (there was no wedding, it was civil marriage thing where we signed papers in presence of witnesses. supposed wedding was 2018-2019). so all the way until i met MM and i fell pregnant and filed for annulment, the marriage was not consummated. we did not live together before and nothing changed after being legally married, we met once every fortnight as a routine. these were more than adequate reasons for my attorney to proceed. which he signed off as well.

iím feeling a bit emotional and of course donít expect anybodyís sympathies or kindness. yet i do think some positivity and logic thinking would help in a long way. itís ultimately my life to lead and for every choice i made (and MM arid), itís my (and his) consequences to bear. thatís life.

happy new year everyone.
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Old 5th January 2018, 9:46 PM   #44
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you need to tell Hubby if you want to be free and the best mum you are.
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Old 6th January 2018, 10:45 AM   #45
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you need to tell Hubby if you want to be free and the best mum you are.
It's all right here in her thread.

GonnaBeFlamed did tell her legal husband, they got an annulment and are no longer married, her MM and his STBXW filed for divorce and are only waiting for the judge to sign off, and Gonna is due to have her baby in the next few months.

GonnaBeFlamed, congratulations! Babies are awesome.
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