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hair loss and sleep disturbance post break up


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its been 7 weeks since my ex MW/OW broke up with me by text.I am a MM

i thought id be okay by now but the headspace thoughts of her are still occupying is huge. Literally all day long i think of her. I haven't slept more than 3-4 hours and am losing all my hair over this! I have been NC for 7 weeks now. Is this normal or am i unusual?

id like to think that she is suffering as much so comments from OW/APs are very welcome

 

P.S does the hair come back ever???

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goldengirl11
its been 7 weeks since my ex MW/OW broke up with me by text.I am a MM

i thought id be okay by now but the headspace thoughts of her are still occupying is huge. Literally all day long i think of her. I haven't slept more than 3-4 hours and am losing all my hair over this! I have been NC for 7 weeks now. Is this normal or am i unusual?

id like to think that she is suffering as much so comments from OW/APs are very welcome

 

P.S does the hair come back ever???

Hi there,

I've been involved with a MM for some time and just had a painful phone call with him re calling it a day. I totally hibernated yesterday, but am determined to go out for a walk at least today.

I'm so sorry to hear about your hair! I would suggest you go and see your GP ASAP, before the problem gets any worse!

I'm sure your ex has still thought of you since the break up, but perhaps hasn't known what to say recently?

I wish you the best!

Take care,

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Midlifecrisis1

As a MW/OW, yes she is thinking about you. I went through all the same things you are going through about a year ago. I spiraled into a deep depression for months. could barely get myself out of bed to be "present" for my kids. cried all day. therapy 2x per week. lost weight (and i'm really skinny to start with, so it's not a good thing). eventually went on antidepressants. After about 5 months (1 month on the antidepressants) i finally started to live again. but i still thought about him every day, for more hours per day than i'd like to admit. i wondered if he thought of me. every freaking day. all day. ugh.

 

eventually he texted me after 8 months of no contact. and you know what?...he had been going through the EXACT same thing as me. total depression, weight GAIN for him, crying every day. etc. He says his marriage is dead. but mine isn't quite dead.

 

So anyway, I think you can rest assured she is thinking about you a lot too. I've heard from others who have had affairs, that you may think about them in some way or another every day for the rest of your life. even if it's just a fleeting thought. but hopefully the time consuming dwelling on it will fade.

 

Good luck. I know how hard it is.

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I'm an OW. And yup I miss him everyday. Think about him and worry about him....

 

My advice to you suck it up. You are in pain of your own creation. You're not leaving your marraige you're not going anywhere so who cares if you miss her if she misses you if you are dying inside......

You are staying in your marraige. You're not going to be w AP. So work on that work on yourself.

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rumblefish12

It is very normal. I also agree that you should talk to your GP. Oftentimes some mild antidepressants will help a lot in the short term. There is a lot of soul searching to be done. But for the sake of your family, get some help. And, my MW/OW and I broke it off many many times - going NC for months. It never mattered who initiated it for the reason, but each time we reconnected (which we shouldn't have) but each time we did both of us had been going through the same thing. No one gets out clean.

 

I agree with Sunshinechica too. We brought this on ourselves. It's time to do the semi-responsible thing and get your act together for the sake of the family. You can do it. We are all doing it one day at a time. Keep in touch here too; it helps.

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Like rumble, my MM and I broke it off multiple times and when we talked about it after the fact, both of us were struggling while NC. I'm sure OW must be thinking of you. But why does that matter now? She's made her choice which I know must not have been easy for her. The question is, what are you going to do about it? It's been 7 weeks. What can you do differently today to start moving forward and start the healing process?

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How can you be going through all of this emotional turmoil without your wife noticing?

 

Just wondering....

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Southern Sun

A sudden bout of hair loss can be triggered by severe emotional stress, usually starting about 4 to 6 weeks from the event. Assuming that your emotional stress will subside (and it is the cause), the hair loss will go away as well. The official dx is typically "telogen effluvium." It just means that larger amounts of hair are being cycled into the telogen (resting) phase of your hair growth cycle than normal...thus falling out faster. If this is what it is, you still have your hair follicle and are growing the hair back. It stops, as your emotions get back to normal.

 

I had it too, when MM and I went down the tubes, D-Day, lost my job, etc, etc.

 

I am sorry for what you're going through. I hope you can focus on your life again and what you HAVE...versus what you don't. It is the only way you will find happiness.

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