Jump to content

Was he trying to make a play for me?


Recommended Posts

Ok,

 

There's this guy in my apt complex and I've seen him around when I walk around the complex. He also says "hi" when we drive past each other or he's driving past me walking and/or my apt.

 

A while back he saw me walking and asked why I looked like I was upset and I don't remember what I told him cuz I am dealing with a lot of stress and just wasn't open to dealing with any guy.

 

So, since he appeared to come around when I'm out/about and notices me, I figured I'd chat him up to see what he's about.

 

Well, in casual conversation he mentioned he had a fiance. He asked my name and where we may have met. When I told him about him asking me about being upset a while back, he said he couldn't recall that.

 

I felt really embarassed because even a few days before I chatted with him he noticed me enough to waive "hi".

 

In the past, I've gotten hit on and even involved with guys who lived in the same area as me and who were in relationships or marriage...so, I thought that this guy was interested.when he mentioned his fiance it didn't bother me much, but when he also said he couldn't recall ever speaking to me, I was taken aback.

 

So, what's going on here? Did I mistake friendliness for interest?

Link to post
Share on other sites
Quiet Storm

Maybe, but its strange that he didn't remember you. Could he have a twin? Maybe he was on drugs or drunk and can't remember. Maybe he was flirting and feels bad about it now. Maybe hes a sociopath and likes playing games with people. There are many possibilites.

 

He has a fiance, so try to keep your mind off of him. Push these thoughts out of your head and think...Next.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
whichwayisup

In the past, I've gotten hit on and even involved with guys who lived in the same area as me and who were in relationships or marriage...so, I thought that this guy was interested.when he mentioned his fiance it didn't bother me much, but when he also said he couldn't recall ever speaking to me, I was taken aback

 

Seems he was just making conversation and that's it. Don't read anything into it at all. He's engaged so there's no point in even thinking about this, he's unavailable.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
wind willow

Where I live, people say hi to each other as they pass all the time. I've said hi to neighbors several times and I have no idea who they are and don't have any interest in them.

 

If I asked someone why they looked upset, I might remember it. But if he's a very social person, it's possible that he has that type of interaction with a lot of people so asking you didn't stand out as memorable to him at all.

 

Anyway, he's engaged. Don't spend any more time worrying about whether he's interested in you or not.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author
It doesn't bother you that he has a fiance, just that he didn't remember you?

 

Yes, it bothered me. I wouldn't want to be someone's gal and getting cheated on. But then again, you never know someone's situation.

 

I got involved with a married guy once and all his wife did was work overseas and he was lonely. They eventually divorced.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Isn't that just making conversation? And it wasn't a big deal so he forgot it? I talk to people all the time - and I don't assume it's a come on in the person happens to be male.

Link to post
Share on other sites
wind willow

Oh. You're into him. I really think it's wishful thinking that he's into you. "I don't even remember talking to you" isn't a pick-up line any normal guy uses. Unless he's doing some sort of douchey PUA thing -- and who would want a guy like that. It's not like you two slept together now he's pretending it didn't happen in order to say he's not guilty. He didn't do anything wrong by talking to you. So there's no reason for him to pretend he doesn't remember a perfectly innocent and normal conversation of asking someone why they look upset.

 

Since there's no good reason for him to pretend he doesn't remember, I believe when he says that he doesn't. Barely remembering you isn't a good sign as to a potential future. I had a friend who remembered every detail of what his wife was wearing the day he first saw her. Guys will remember talking to women they're interested in.

 

I don't know what his relationship with his fiance is any more than you. But it doesn't really matter, because he's not into you.

 

If you pursue him, and he's a decent guy, you'll get off just looking foolish. If he's not such a decent guy, he might sleep with you for awhile and you'll end up hurt because your feelings for him will be stronger than his for you. It doesn't have much to do with him having a fiance. Just his lack of interest in you. Even if he were single, it wouldn't make much difference to how it's going to turn out.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...