DarkAngel87 Posted April 24, 2014 Share Posted April 24, 2014 I never really thought about it until now. I think it explains why I am having affair. I was raised by a single mom and still don’t know who my bio dad is. So I never had a really father figure growing up. I never really thought much about until now. I have always been a attracted to older men, and only really dated guys older than me, I mean almost all of the guys I dated were older than me. My SO is only guy I have ever been with who my age. I guess the reason why I liked being with older guys is because I liked to feel that security and safety in a relationship. I was looking for someone who was going protect me and look after me. Idk i think maybe this is part of the reason why I am having affair. I kind of realized all of this yesterday when I was with my mm. I could be just thinking too much but sometimes I do get jealous of his daughter. I haven’t told him and I don’t plan to. Link to post Share on other sites
jellybean89 Posted April 25, 2014 Share Posted April 25, 2014 Having an affair with your boss is such a bad idea. I don't think it is daddy issues...I think it is generation issues. You are 26 -- your generation is a very self centered "me me me" generation. Instant gratification. How are you going to continue to work there when the affair blows up? Don't blame your choice to have an affair on daddy issues. Own your decisions. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
sssn Posted April 25, 2014 Share Posted April 25, 2014 any chance you are a capricorn? could be in the stars. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ThatsJustHowIRoll Posted April 25, 2014 Share Posted April 25, 2014 (edited) Yeah. I have 'Daddy issues' too...read my past posts...its all there. Yep...attracted to older men too... Still never slept with a married one though....thut just coninues the cycle...bringing down dysfuntion and 'daddy issues' on some other poor innocent sod. Congratulations -you know your 'why'. Well part of it...not everyone with Daddy issues makes the choices you have. Now what are you going to do about it? ETA: My Daddy issues stem from infidelity. That daughter you're jealous of? She'll have them too. Live with that on your conscience. Edited April 25, 2014 by ThatsJustHowIRoll 2 Link to post Share on other sites
sushilonair1 Posted April 25, 2014 Share Posted April 25, 2014 Dear ,yes its true.its do exist.yes its quite natural that ,that young girls often attracted to older guys.its make them feel secure and protected.I think there is nothing wrong.but do think carefully.sorry for your childhood loss Definitely ,a good future waiting for you. Link to post Share on other sites
KaliLove Posted April 25, 2014 Share Posted April 25, 2014 My mom was single and mentally ill, no bio dad in the picture, only child..I have never and will never be involved in an affair. Not as an OW or as a MW. So there goes that theory. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
sweet_pea Posted April 25, 2014 Share Posted April 25, 2014 It might explain your attraction toward older men, but it does not, in my opinion, explain/excuse your having an affair with a married man. 7 Link to post Share on other sites
nais Posted April 25, 2014 Share Posted April 25, 2014 Your looking for reasons to justify what you do- perhaps you simply liked this gentleman and his status in life did not stop you from moving forward. Had their been a father figure would it have made a difference- lack of having had one allows you to find comfort in what was missed. However, a real dads affection does not compare to the one your receiving now. I did not know my real dad coming up- I had a father figure and grew up thinking he was my dad. Once I met my real dad I felt the difference in an instant. Maybe you simply fell for someone of he opposite sex who was older... Link to post Share on other sites
Cocochai Posted April 26, 2014 Share Posted April 26, 2014 I was raised by both parents and my father was my heart all the way up until he passed... My parents were together for 36 years yet I still choose to have an A. I don't know why people think it's because of "Daddy issues" and it may very well be but remember... Engaging/cheating is a choice.. A CHOICE!!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author DarkAngel87 Posted April 26, 2014 Author Share Posted April 26, 2014 Having an affair with your boss is such a bad idea. I don't think it is daddy issues...I think it is generation issues. You are 26 -- your generation is a very self centered "me me me" generation. Instant gratification. How are you going to continue to work there when the affair blows up? Don't blame your choice to have an affair on daddy issues. Own your decisions. yes, having an affair at work isn’t the best idea and I know that. I think that’s BS, I know women of all ages that cheat. What generation you were born has very little to do with it. I plan to quit my job when my SO comes back the states. I already have another job waiting. I will start after I come back from vac with my SO I’m not blaming my daddy issues. Hell I don’t even know if I have any daddy issues I just thought it be one of the reason I stared this affair. Link to post Share on other sites
ThatsJustHowIRoll Posted April 27, 2014 Share Posted April 27, 2014 So wait...what? You'll quit your job instead of the affair??? You want reasons? Try these.. Lack of boundaries Lack of empathy An overblown sense of entitlement Immaturity (jealous of the daughter? Really????) Lack of common sense... And that's just the obvious from reading this thread. That should give you something to work with... I suggest IC Link to post Share on other sites
Author DarkAngel87 Posted April 27, 2014 Author Share Posted April 27, 2014 So wait...what? You'll quit your job instead of the affair??? You want reasons? Try these.. Lack of boundaries Lack of empathy An overblown sense of entitlement Immaturity (jealous of the daughter? Really????) Lack of common sense... And that's just the obvious from reading this thread. That should give you something to work with... I suggest IC No, I was already had another job offer before the affair started. I would prefer to stay with my current employer but new job will pay more and I will have a better positions. My affair has very little reason why I am leaving. My SO is coming back soon and when he does I plan to put an end to affair. I know I am coming off very cold hearted. In real very day life I am nothing like this most of the people close to me would I am very loving and caring person. Most wouldn't think I was capable of doing something like this. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts