Unintentional LC

[inappfriendly]

xMM and I live in the same neighborhood.Kids attend the same school (where I now work).

Have been no contact since the beginning of the school year.

Unfortunately, I still see him occassionally at drop off and pick up.

 

 

More so lately, for some reason.

There are no longing looks or smiles. He barely even looks at me. I KNOW this isn't ideal to see him at all and that maintaining NC is in the best interest of his family, but every single time I see him it is like my heart is breaking all over again. It feels sad and cold and lonely to think he is just someone I used to know. I struggle with not reaching out to him. Last night I literally had to sit on my hands to keep from messaging him.

 

 

I don't want the A back but his stone face cuts me to the core. I just want to know that he doesn't hate me. It would be fair if he did, I suppose, given the damage I have done to his M but we BOTH willingly entered into the inappropriate relationship. When it had to end, I let it without a fight and never went Bunny Boiler crazy. I certainly could have. I have a lot of revenge material!

 

 

Why does it still matter to me what he thinks of me?! To anyone who has followed me through this, I am sure it seems like I am still spinning my wheels. The unintentional LC is definitely keeping me stuck. How is he able to move forward without a backwards glance given these "conditions"?! I would honestly love to know his secret!

[Devastated1969]

xMM and I live in the same neighborhood.Kids attend the same school (where I now work).

Have been no contact since the beginning of the school year.

Unfortunately, I still see him occassionally at drop off and pick up.

 

 

More so lately, for some reason.

There are no longing looks or smiles. He barely even looks at me. I KNOW this isn't ideal to see him at all and that maintaining NC is in the best interest of his family, but every single time I see him it is like my heart is breaking all over again. It feels sad and cold and lonely to think he is just someone I used to know. I struggle with not reaching out to him. Last night I literally had to sit on my hands to keep from messaging him.

 

 

I don't want the A back but his stone face cuts me to the core. I just want to know that he doesn't hate me. It would be fair if he did, I suppose, given the damage I have done to his M but we BOTH willingly entered into the inappropriate relationship. When it had to end, I let it without a fight and never went Bunny Boiler crazy. I certainly could have. I have a lot of revenge material!

 

 

Why does it still matter to me what he thinks of me?! To anyone who has followed me through this, I am sure it seems like I am still spinning my wheels. The unintentional LC is definitely keeping me stuck. How is he able to move forward without a backwards glance given these "conditions"?! I would honestly love to know his secret!

 

Hugs Inapp, I totally understand the need to know he doesn't hate you. I have had very similar feelings. What I believe is that he still has feelings for you which is why he has the stone face. It is his way of coping with the end of something that didn't end because your feelings had gone. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to see him, I'm lucky that my exMM lives 2 hours away so no chance of that happening. I am sure he still cares for you and respects the way you have handled the end. Hold your head up and keep going, you have given me such amazing help and support and I think you are a wonderful person x

[Cocochai]

xMM and I live in the same neighborhood.Kids attend the same school (where I now work).

Have been no contact since the beginning of the school year.

Unfortunately, I still see him occassionally at drop off and pick up.

 

 

More so lately, for some reason.

There are no longing looks or smiles. He barely even looks at me. I KNOW this isn't ideal to see him at all and that maintaining NC is in the best interest of his family, but every single time I see him it is like my heart is breaking all over again. It feels sad and cold and lonely to think he is just someone I used to know. I struggle with not reaching out to him. Last night I literally had to sit on my hands to keep from messaging him.

 

 

I don't want the A back but his stone face cuts me to the core. I just want to know that he doesn't hate me. It would be fair if he did, I suppose, given the damage I have done to his M but we BOTH willingly entered into the inappropriate relationship. When it had to end, I let it without a fight and never went Bunny Boiler crazy. I certainly could have. I have a lot of revenge material!

 

 

Why does it still matter to me what he thinks of me?! To anyone who has followed me through this, I am sure it seems like I am still spinning my wheels. The unintentional LC is definitely keeping me stuck. How is he able to move forward without a backwards glance given these "conditions"?! I would honestly love to know his secret!

 

I'm sure you still have feelings for him... Some people even tho they are not together anymore but don't want any bad feelings lingering in the air.

 

Some people believe in NC and moving on... Your in my past for a reason. In this case it's an XMM.

 

If it makes you feel any better, you could be the bigger person and just say "hey I know we can't see each other but at least we don't have to act cold towards each other"..

 

I don't know your background story but it's obviously bothering you but at the same time you may just have to let go and move on.

[road]

xMM and I live in the same neighborhood.Kids attend the same school (where I now work).

Have been no contact since the beginning of the school year.

Unfortunately, I still see him occassionally at drop off and pick up.

 

 

More so lately, for some reason.

There are no longing looks or smiles. He barely even looks at me. I KNOW this isn't ideal to see him at all and that maintaining NC is in the best interest of his family, but every single time I see him it is like my heart is breaking all over again. It feels sad and cold and lonely to think he is just someone I used to know. I struggle with not reaching out to him. Last night I literally had to sit on my hands to keep from messaging him.

 

 

I don't want the A back but his stone face cuts me to the core. I just want to know that he doesn't hate me. It would be fair if he did, I suppose, given the damage I have done to his M but we BOTH willingly entered into the inappropriate relationship. When it had to end, I let it without a fight and never went Bunny Boiler crazy. I certainly could have. I have a lot of revenge material!

 

 

Why does it still matter to me what he thinks of me?! To anyone who has followed me through this, I am sure it seems like I am still spinning my wheels. The unintentional LC is definitely keeping me stuck. How is he able to move forward without a backwards glance given these "conditions"?! I would honestly love to know his secret!

 

 

This is why there must be NC. Why you need to find another job.

[Hardgrind]

Inappfriendly,

 

I am writing this from the perspective of a BH.

 

I doubt your MM hates you. Honestly it is his own fault that he was in the A and if he really thinks it is primarily your fault, he is blameshifting. I suspect that stone face is part of his recovery process. Most likely he doesn't trust himself enough yet to let other emotions show in your presence.

 

My WW is in the process of shifting from giddiness to anger when she thinks about her OM. He hasn't changed, it's her own perception of the A that is changing so that she can move into R in our M. As the BH the most difficult thing for me to deal with is my WW's continuing struggles with her feelings about the OM. I suspect that his W is in the same boat and his actions (or lack of them) is his effort to stay focused on his W rather than you.

 

It matters to you because of your feelings for him and because of its impact on your self esteem. Same with my wife.

[PurpleCardigan]

Life is cruel sometimes, isn't it? I have what you want (the smile) and you have what I want (the stone face).

 

I truly wish that I had something to make you feel better, but no one knows what is going on in xMM's head. Gently, he may love you or he may hate you or something in between but only shows it one way in a stone face. He may have re-written your history to make himself feel better or, like you, he may be apathetic at the moment and then respond with a stone face. He could also resent you because you have what he wants but is not strong enough to get on his own -- an ending M leading towards D. All you do know right now is that he doesn't want to be friends/cordial. Just because I was stone faced to xMM, doesn't mean that I still don't care -- clearly I do after yesterday -- but I'm working to end it just like my ex requested. However I don't mention my feelings to give you hope, he's made a decision to stay married and until that changes you may never know what is going on in his head.

 

In an ideal world you could change jobs, but you are teaching at the same school as your kids which is a wonderful opportunity and one that I'm not sure I would give up (if I had kids) especially as a single mom for spring break, holidays, etc. Are there ways that you can reduce the unintentional LC? Such as volunteer to work the parking lot at recess or after school versus in the morning when you usually see him? Does your school allow those kinds of assignments? Can you partner with another teacher to help reduce the contact right now? What are the creative ways that you can use to reduce seeing him? Summer is coming, too, hopefully that helps (unless you do year-round schooling).

 

However, I do wish there was a way to snap our fingers and become unstuck. When I was trying to decide what to you about the "friendship" with xMM my therapist said to me that I was choosing to stay friends and pine for him so that I would not have to put myself out there in a real, reciprocal relationship. It was self-protection/self-sabotage by extreme emotional pain leading to numbness. Ouch that hurt. But she was right. I needed (and need) to work on the hard stuff about myself. I'm not saying this is you, but you are under an intense amount of emotional stress from your affair, dday, ending marriage, feelings over xMM, etc. That's a lot to deal with. What is it that you WANT and is under your CONTROL?

[Patna]

Totally feel you. Hugs! When Dday happened, all I could think of was:

Does he hate me?

Does he still love me?

Does he still feel close to me?

Does he care about my feelings?

Does he still wish to see me?

What happened to all that we'd shared?

How come his feelings for me can switch off instantly like a switch as if we never had any shared past?

The more I think about such thoughts, the more tormented I felt. These are questions we will most probably never had the answers for, and it's best to accept that we have to live with no closure rather than torment ourselves further. Hugs!

[inappfriendly]

Inappfriendly,

 

I am writing this from the perspective of a BH.

 

I doubt your MM hates you. Honestly it is his own fault that he was in the A and if he really thinks it is primarily your fault, he is blameshifting. I suspect that stone face is part of his recovery process. Most likely he doesn't trust himself enough yet to let other emotions show in your presence.

 

My WW is in the process of shifting from giddiness to anger when she thinks about her OM. He hasn't changed, it's her own perception of the A that is changing so that she can move into R in our M. As the BH the most difficult thing for me to deal with is my WW's continuing struggles with her feelings about the OM. I suspect that his W is in the same boat and his actions (or lack of them) is his effort to stay focused on his W rather than you.

 

It matters to you because of your feelings for him and because of its impact on your self esteem. Same with my wife.

 

Hardgrind, I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to reply! Your perspective is more helpful than you can imagine. I hate that I get so caught up in my own brokenness that I forget to see the situation from the BS angles. Thank you for the dose of reality and honesty.

 

 

 

Dev and PC, I don't know what I would do without your consistently kind and encouraging words. It is nice to feel so genuinely understood and cared about by "strangers". We are both unfortunate yet fortunate to be connected by our experiences. When I start to feel like I don't deserve any better than this, y'all set me straight and remind me that people are not inherently bad. We err, we repent, and move forward. Some of us just progress more slowly than others! I took my two steps back this week. Carefully working on my foot placement this weekend. ((hugs))

[PurpleCardigan]

in honor of putting one foot in front of the other I'm about to climb 1800 stairs for charity and I dedicate them to you!

[sunburned]

Just wanted to give you a digital ((((hug)))).

 

Sounds to me like he still loves you. The stone face isn't because he doesn't (just read PurpleCardigan's latest post) but it's his (or his W's) chosen method for moving on. Is it possible to further limit your LC with him by not being around during pickup or drop off or whenever it is you're seeing him? Another question is why does HE keeping showing up at school? Why isn't it is W or maybe a sitter? Just saying he sounds to me like he could limit contact on his end, but chooses not do. Probably still carries a torch himself.

 

One more (((hug))). Stay tough. You are handling things just as you should.

[AlwaysGrowing]

xMM and I live in the same neighborhood.Kids attend the same school (where I now work).

Have been no contact since the beginning of the school year.

Unfortunately, I still see him occassionally at drop off and pick up.

 

 

More so lately, for some reason.

There are no longing looks or smiles. He barely even looks at me. I KNOW this isn't ideal to see him at all and that maintaining NC is in the best interest of his family, but every single time I see him it is like my heart is breaking all over again. It feels sad and cold and lonely to think he is just someone I used to know. I struggle with not reaching out to him. Last night I literally had to sit on my hands to keep from messaging him.

 

 

I don't want the A back but his stone face cuts me to the core. I just want to know that he doesn't hate me. It would be fair if he did, I suppose, given the damage I have done to his M but we BOTH willingly entered into the inappropriate relationship. When it had to end, I let it without a fight and never went Bunny Boiler crazy. I certainly could have. I have a lot of revenge material!

 

 

Why does it still matter to me what he thinks of me?! To anyone who has followed me through this, I am sure it seems like I am still spinning my wheels. The unintentional LC is definitely keeping me stuck. How is he able to move forward without a backwards glance given these "conditions"?! I would honestly love to know his secret!

 

 

Digging deep inside yourself to identify what it is that this triggers (internally) will be beneficial to you. Really asking yourself, why it seems so important to you that he not hate you. Is it really about him? Or is this really about you?

 

Too often we look(unconsciously) for others to fix/fill what is missing/broken inside of us. When we learn to give that to ourselves, we become empowered.

 

Give yourself credit for not succumbing, there is a part of you...looking out for you.....which has much strength. Lean on that part of you more often.

[littlemermaid]

Sorry you are going through this, my xMOM lives in my neighborhood very close by and I see him from time to time. His reaction to me is the same as your xMM. He doesn't want to see me at all, and it hurts to see when I can remember how his face used to light up with the hugest smile whenever he would see me, and he would always run to me and grab me in the biggest hug...to go from that, to a cold face with averted eyes...just hurts.

[RickFox]

Inapp

 

Man, I tell you what, you sound like me in reverse. Xmw and I live in the same neighborhood, our kids attend the same school, it's where we met and where we bonded long before the affair began. It is the biggest trigger of them all. Only difference is, she doesn't work at the school.

 

I don't remember your story but I can tell you I felt the same way, how she wouldn't look at me, how she turned away from me when I was close and so on. And then a few wise people told me that if she truly didn't care, she wouldn't act like that, she wouldn't avoid me but she was doing it for her survival and in the end it no longer mattered. While it hurt to know that, I had to move forward because in the end, no matter what, if they didn't do whatever it took to have contact, if they didn't end up with you, then they aren't yours to worry about anymore.

 

But I also would ask you, did you have the same frozen look? Did you act the same way in the beginning when you saw him? You see, no matter how much I hurt, no matter how much I put myself in the position to see my xmw (damn you NJ), she had the stone face look and you know what, so did I becaues I would be damned if she would relish in the fact that I was missing her while she seemed perfectly fine after we were over. This is what men and women do....we play the game, who is not hurt game, who has moved on fast game and if we truly did care, we are hurting and missing you and it's compounded when we see you....

 

This is why I go to the back of the school, for me, not for her so that I don't see her, so the memories don't hit as hard, so the trigger is just the school and I can maintain because you know what, I still get angry at times, and I get hit out of the blue by certain triggers, blindsided actually, especially at this time of year, but you have to trudge forward.

 

There is no other choice

[Wambo]

xMM and I live in the same neighborhood.Kids attend the same school (where I now work).

Have been no contact since the beginning of the school year.

Unfortunately, I still see him occassionally at drop off and pick up.

 

 

More so lately, for some reason.

There are no longing looks or smiles. He barely even looks at me. I KNOW this isn't ideal to see him at all and that maintaining NC is in the best interest of his family, but every single time I see him it is like my heart is breaking all over again. It feels sad and cold and lonely to think he is just someone I used to know. I struggle with not reaching out to him. Last night I literally had to sit on my hands to keep from messaging him.

 

 

I don't want the A back but his stone face cuts me to the core. I just want to know that he doesn't hate me. It would be fair if he did, I suppose, given the damage I have done to his M but we BOTH willingly entered into the inappropriate relationship. When it had to end, I let it without a fight and never went Bunny Boiler crazy. I certainly could have. I have a lot of revenge material!

 

 

Why does it still matter to me what he thinks of me?! To anyone who has followed me through this, I am sure it seems like I am still spinning my wheels. The unintentional LC is definitely keeping me stuck. How is he able to move forward without a backwards glance given these "conditions"?! I would honestly love to know his secret!

 

 

Every great magic trick consists of three parts or acts. The first part is called "The Pledge". The magician shows you something ordinary: a deck of cards, a bird or a man. He shows you this object. Perhaps he asks you to inspect it to see if it is indeed real, unaltered, normal. But of course... it probably isn't. The second act is called "The Turn". The magician takes the ordinary something and makes it do something extraordinary. Now you're looking for the secret... but you won't find it, because of course you're not really looking. You don't really want to know. You want to be fooled. But you wouldn't clap yet. Because making something disappear isn't enough; you have to bring it back. That's why every magic trick has a third act, the hardest part, the part we call "The Prestige"."

Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled.

[inappfriendly]

Rickfox, you are spot on. It is uncanny how similar our situations are/were. Or maybe Elementary Schools are just breeding grounds for affairs? Who knows. I didn't work there when it started. Like you, we bonded as parents and it grew from there. I got the job out of necessity when sh$& fell apart at home. No one can survive on zero income and the schedule obviously works for me and my kids. But that it neither here nor there.

 

Seeing it from your perspective is always enlightening. You are right about my reaction. I don't. I don't smile. I don't cry. I just look away. I can't afford to spend time analyzing eye contact, longing looks or the lack of either. It all brings me back to square one. Out of self-preservation I know I have to make this contact STOP. With the school as my biggest trigger as well as this particular season, I will not survive otherwise. Not to be dramatic but it is literally how I feel.

 

 

You are also right that bottomline, at the end of the day, none of it matters. What is done is done and no reaction or lack thereof or hidden meanings or feelings and whatnot on either of our parts is going to change the reality of the present. So we all trudge on...

[Wambo]

inappfriendly

 

I didn't really want to say anything because I wasn't sure how you could handle the news. I was concerned if you knew the truth he still had feelings for you, it could put your NC process at harm and may set you back. I'm glad you accepted the facts and still continuing to move on. The only thing I think people missed out is stone facing also makes you unapproachable aswell, aka a buffer zone between the stone facer and exap.

 

I'm guilty of doing the stone face myself and like you my exAP is getting the wrong end of the stick. Now it's so bad I'm thinking about breaking NC and setting the record straight. She used to be upset with my stone facing and of course when people get hurt so much it often turn to anger and she is letting me know how much she hates me. I originally wanted to break NC when she was upset but a lot of people advise me don't and I think now my situation is more toxic.

[DKT3]

xMM and I live in the same neighborhood.Kids attend the same school (where I now work).

Have been no contact since the beginning of the school year.

Unfortunately, I still see him occassionally at drop off and pick up.

 

 

More so lately, for some reason.

There are no longing looks or smiles. He barely even looks at me. I KNOW this isn't ideal to see him at all and that maintaining NC is in the best interest of his family, but every single time I see him it is like my heart is breaking all over again. It feels sad and cold and lonely to think he is just someone I used to know. I struggle with not reaching out to him. Last night I literally had to sit on my hands to keep from messaging him.

 

 

I don't want the A back but his stone face cuts me to the core. I just want to know that he doesn't hate me. It would be fair if he did, I suppose, given the damage I have done to his M but we BOTH willingly entered into the inappropriate relationship. When it had to end, I let it without a fight and never went Bunny Boiler crazy. I certainly could have. I have a lot of revenge material!

 

 

Why does it still matter to me what he thinks of me?! To anyone who has followed me through this, I am sure it seems like I am still spinning my wheels. The unintentional LC is definitely keeping me stuck. How is he able to move forward without a backwards glance given these "conditions"?! I would honestly love to know his secret!

 

His secret is no matter what he told you, he simply wasn't as emotionally vested in the affair as you were. That old saying, power lays with the person that cares less about the end. I hate to pile on, but cold facts are what you need to deal with the emotional pain. Not so much that it will make you feel better in the moment but it will help you avoid falling for this crap again. Fact is, he did love you. While you may not feel this way he used you. Sure you were willing. But what woman goes into an affair with a guy that says. "I have no intention on leaving my wife, I love her and you will always be my side woman until I grow tried of you or I get caught. I will then drop you is a second and act as if you meant nothing to me" very few. You get sold of the idea that he is a victim in a horrible marriage that for whatever reason he can't simply walk away. You are what he needs to be happy.

 

My guess is every OW here was sold on a story along those lines. Its all crap. I was unhappy in my marriage, I have two kids and 23 years of history. The divorce cost me a half million dollar house $3,000 a month and half the time with my kids. And I didn't have a woman on the side. She cheated and that was that.

 

My point is, stop fooling yourself into thinking you meant so much to him. See it for what it was. He used what he had to, to get what he wanted. Your worth more then that.

[inappfriendly]

Thanks for your reply, Wambo.Like your xAP, my hurt is definitely manifesting itself as anger lately.

I am not a vengeful person by nature, but I despise imbalance and as DKT3 clearly pointed out, that is what the reality of my situation is. She who loves more, hurts more.

If I were to break NC it would be in the spirit of revenge and the last thing I want to do is cause trouble for him. Nor would it ease my mind about him not hating me! There is really no ideal ending to this whole mess.

So for now I'll breathe in, breathe out...

[PurpleCardigan]

snip

 

She who loves more, hurts more.

 

^^^^This. The sad universal part of love & broken hearts.

[DKT3]

Thanks for your reply, Wambo.Like your xAP, my hurt is definitely manifesting itself as anger lately.

I am not a vengeful person by nature, but I despise imbalance and as DKT3 clearly pointed out, that is what the reality of my situation is. She who loves more, hurts more.

If I were to break NC it would be in the spirit of revenge and the last thing I want to do is cause trouble for him. Nor would it ease my mind about him not hating me! There is really no ideal ending to this whole mess.

So for now I'll breathe in, breathe out...

 

The best revenge is to live well and be happy. Don't break NC for any reason. Focus on your kids and yourself. When the time is right, the right guy will come along. Waste no more time on this guy.

[Wambo]

Thanks for your reply, Wambo.Like your xAP, my hurt is definitely manifesting itself as anger lately.

I am not a vengeful person by nature, but I despise imbalance and as DKT3 clearly pointed out, that is what the reality of my situation is. She who loves more, hurts more.

If I were to break NC it would be in the spirit of revenge and the last thing I want to do is cause trouble for him. Nor would it ease my mind about him not hating me! There is really no ideal ending to this whole mess.

So for now I'll breathe in, breathe out...

 

I just don't understand the reason why she's blaming me. Afterall she made the decisions to progress her relationship with her questionable boyfriend to the next level, I didn't force her to do that but he did. All I did was to remove myself from the situation and try to move on.

It like she's blaming me for everything or throwing all her anger at me. I'm not sure she blaming me for her situation or the situation with her c*** boyfriend is getting worst. All I do know is sometimes she does her best to aviod eye contact and other time try to hurt me by making herself known.

 

Look at it this way inappfriendly, at least he doesn't walk pass you with 30cm to spare or make hints he can't stand you. I'm am truly ****ing annoyed and no doubt will break NC just to put her straight. I will tell her the situation she placed me in and remind her I'm not the one going out my way to get notice.

 

Inappfriendly I also want to thank you for confirming my fear about the effects my stone face is having on the exap. I didn't set out to hurt her and like your exAP I think he's trying to give you as much space as possible in these difficult situation. However you have the right to be angry because he is the one mostly to blame for putting you in this situation. However my exAP is mostly to blame for turning our platonic friendship into an EA and not leaving me alone afterward.

[Waverly]

My xMM is thousands of miles away. On the one hand, I hate that. I wish he were closer. BUT -- if it had to end, I am SO glad I do not have to deal with running into him in town. The thought of it makes my stomach hurt.

 

I really wouldn't read too much into his stone face. My guess is that that's his defense mechanism. My x and I spent way too much time talking about this kind of stuff. We tried to stay friends, and ultimately couldn't do it. I remember being upset one day that he was pushing me away, and he explained it like this: the greater the threat, the greater the need to separate from it. I was a threat to his moving on, and to his trying to fix things in his marriage. I hate it, but I get it.

 

I have no idea, of course, what's going on in your xAPs head, but my guess is that if he were really living the good life back home with his family, and totally over you, he wouldn't care one way or the other, and would be a lot more inclined to just wave and say hey. Chances are he's just as mixed up inside as you are -- for whatever consolation that is.

[inappfriendly]

"Inappfriendly I also want to thank you for confirming my fear about the effects my stone face is having on the exap. I didn't set out to hurt her and like your exAP I think he's trying to give you as much space as possible in these difficult situation. However you have the right to be angry because he is the one mostly to blame for putting you in this situation. However my exAP is mostly to blame for turning our platonic friendship into an EA and not leaving me alone afterward."

 

Wambo, Dude, I totally get you and am feeling the same things. I know we are no longer a part of each others' lives, no matter what we shared, and I need to leave him alone to straighten out his life. There is definitely a part of me, however, that just wants to shake him and ask how he could have forgotten it all so quickly.

 

 

This quote keeps running around my brain:

 

 

The biggest coward is a man who awakens a woman’s love with no intention of loving her.

- Bob Marley

Same can be said for a woman, too, of course. Affairs are just all around emotionally messy.

Best, Wambo, in sorting through all this rubble.

[Mickey1982]

"Inappfriendly I also want to thank you for confirming my fear about the effects my stone face is having on the exap. I didn't set out to hurt her and like your exAP I think he's trying to give you as much space as possible in these difficult situation. However you have the right to be angry because he is the one mostly to blame for putting you in this situation. However my exAP is mostly to blame for turning our platonic friendship into an EA and not leaving me alone afterward."

 

Wambo, Dude, I totally get you and am feeling the same things. I know we are no longer a part of each others' lives, no matter what we shared, and I need to leave him alone to straighten out his life. There is definitely a part of me, however, that just wants to shake him and ask how he could have forgotten it all so quickly.

 

 

This quote keeps running around my brain:

 

 

The biggest coward is a man who awakens a woman’s love with no intention of loving her.

- Bob Marley

Same can be said for a woman, too, of course. Affairs are just all around emotionally messy.

Best, Wambo, in sorting through all this rubble.

 

 

OMG, this is SOOOO what I want to say:

shake him and ask how he could have forgotten it all so quickly.

[PurpleCardigan]

snip.

 

 

This quote keeps running around my brain:

 

 

The biggest coward is a man who awakens a woman’s love with no intention of loving her.

- Bob Marley

Same can be said for a woman, too, of course. Affairs are just all around emotionally messy.

 

I think you might be my long lost twin! This same quote circled my head when I was nearing my breaking point and taking back my life by making choices and taking action rather than waiting on his inaction.