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Here is my story

The Other Man / Woman The other side of the story: Support and discussion for those who find themselves involved with a committed partner.

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Old 4th July 2013, 3:00 PM   #1
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Here is my story

For a little while now I have been chatting to various people on a chat room, a couple I have kept in touch with on Skype and they are just purely friendship relationships nothing more.

4 weeks ago I started chatting in PM to a man, what drew him to me was his user name was the same as the city where I live so not thinking anything would become of it I made the first contact, we spoke for 2 hrs maybe more then we continued to meet in the chat-room over the next week, I eventually after a few days confessed that the reason I statrted talking to him was because of his name and told him that I lived in the same city, which he was cool about, after more chats and mutual flirting he hinted that we should meet for a coffee which we did, he was very much the gentleman we chatted about day to day stuff and we did kiss as we where leaving each other.

As I left I couldn't help but think that we wouldn't meet up again and thought for some reason he didn't like me, no sooner as we drove away from each other he text'ed me to say how much he had enjoyed meeting with me when I got home I text'ed him back to say that I too had enjoyed our meeting and left it at that for him to make the next move if he wanted.

The next day he text me to say "hi" and that he meant to say how much he had enjoyed our kiss and if I would like to meet up again when he returned from his 10 day holiday to which I agreed but didnt really hold out much hope that he would contact me again on his return, the day after his return he messaged me asking how I was and if I would still like to meet and that he would understand if I had had a change of heart... I hadn't, and we met again, we had a few more days of very flirty and naughty txt's and yesterday I invited him to my house where we ended up in bed together although we didnt have sex we just had a bit of "fun" ... I meant to add that when we first agreed to meet we did say that neither of us where looking to leave our marriages and it was purley for fun and excitment which I am totally cool with.

I just needed to air all of this as its not really something you can just bring up in conversation with friends but if anyone wishes to comment then feel free.
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Old 4th July 2013, 3:16 PM   #2
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Stop all contact NOW. Things may seems good to start with but over time things will get complicated and turn into a mess.
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Old 4th July 2013, 3:19 PM   #3
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Three words: "Train meet wreck".

Just sayin'

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Old 4th July 2013, 3:26 PM   #4
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I hope you change the bed linen afterwards. Not nice to use the marital bed for that purpose.
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Old 4th July 2013, 3:51 PM   #5
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A few questions:

-If you're not looking to leave your marriage with your husband, why the affair? You realize, if the affair is discovered, there's a real possibility the marriage will end, right?

-Are there issues in the marriage that make you want to seek attention elsewhere?

-Could any said issues have been worked on? Did you ever make an attempt to communicate with your husband on the matter?

You might be enjoying yourself now, but rest assured, this can and likely will get very messy.

Why didn't you discuss an open marriage with your husband? If you two could reach a mutual agreement, then you could avoid the sticky business of a secret affair.
"You should show me some respect; I dragged you out of hell, I can throw you back in." -Castiel-
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Old 4th July 2013, 3:57 PM   #6
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Maybe you could let your husband know you want an open marriage so he can get some fun & excitement too? Just seems like this would be the decent thing to do.
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