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I told his GF


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I met him 2 years ago at the time he was single I got pregnant to him but I needed a break as I was scarred to miscarrage again, in that time her met her gf move in with her he never told her about our child.

 

When we met up again I still love him so started seeing him again got pregnant again, when I had my baby I was so depressed and lonly. I lost it I email her told her he was cheating on her with me and has two girls to me, she kick him out for 3 weeks now just took him back. he hates me wont talk to me again,

 

the sad part my girls have lost their father cos I was selfish. I have so much blame. She did have a right to know about his girls. im so sad I miss him how do you get over the man? has this happen to you?

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Wow, you should really become educated on birth control methods and how to use them. Why would you think that sleeping with him while he was living with another woman was a good idea? And then... You got pregnant again? If I were a guy, I would think you were using your lack of birth control to try and trap a man. So apparently he loves this other woman and now he is mad at you for what you did. However from what I am reading, he has never spent any real amount of time with your/his daughter, so you have not taken anything away from her. you are only feeling sorry for yourself because he doesn't want to see you anymore.

 

My advice is grow up! Make changes to be the best possible parent for your daughter. Be a good role model. Get a decent job. Make something of yourself, a mommy your daughter will be proud of. The better of a mommy you are to that little girl, the better of a man you will find to share life with you and her. Men can find booty all over, but a good honest woman who is also a role model mommy... now that is hard to find, and is someone worthy of taking home to meet his mother. Then you are getting somewhere. So in the meantime, put a chastity belt on, pick up your boots and become a responsible parent.

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... in that time her met her gf move in with her he never told her about our child.

 

the sad part my girls have lost their father cos I was selfish. I have so much blame. She did have a right to know about his girls. im so sad I miss him how do you get over the man? has this happen to you?

 

Your girls never had their father. To loose something you hand to at one point and time possess/own it. He never acknowledged his offsprings. Any man that denies his child is rotten to the core and no good will come to them. I don't know what the circumstances are revolving his choice to abstain. If you need to get a court ordered DNA test, you do it. The when paternity is proven please proceed to get the financial support your children will need. You have work to do, get busy. Focus on what's important right now and be strong for your children.

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  • 4 years later...
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update

 

well my girls father is now in there life and ended up beaking up with his gf a year later, he move to another town, I have a son to his brother now :eek:

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update

 

well my girls father is now in there life and ended up beaking up with his gf a year later, he move to another town, I have a son to his brother now :eek:

 

Are you saying the fathers of your children are brothers?

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freengreen

This is the most cluttered thread i have ever read here.

 

why and how did you end up getting pregnant with brothers???. Are both of them affairs!?...

 

Please take a break and stop this. Forget about the men and focus totally on the kids ( i am not judging you as a mother, please dont get me wrong here)which could be a break.

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This is the most cluttered thread i have ever read here.

 

why and how did you end up getting pregnant with brothers???. Are both of them affairs!?...

 

Please take a break and stop this. Forget about the men and focus totally on the kids ( i am not judging you as a mother, please dont get me wrong here)which could be a break.

 

I had the affair with his brother after the 1st one stop taking to me and was there for me when i was crying over the 1st one, some how turn into affair, wasnt planned,

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freengreen
I had the affair with his brother after the 1st one stop taking to me and was there for me when i was crying over the 1st one, some how turn into affair, wasnt planned,

Sigh

 

Its not a nice spot to be in... but it can be changed if you want to. Its awkward to get child support from two brothers, but if you have to do it, do it.

 

I am not sure if you have to keep contact with these men for the sake of the girls. I feel sorry for the kids, really.

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somanymistakes
I had the affair with his brother after the 1st one stop taking to me and was there for me when i was crying over the 1st one, some how turn into affair, wasnt planned,

 

Not planned by you maybe but it sounds like he may have seen you were vulnerable and totally willing to get into affair situations, and gone for it...

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Two things that might help you

 

( a) stay away from guys, at least for now. It sounds like your "man picker" is pretty messed up. Take some time with your kids, watch them grow and grow yourself. Learn more about yourself and who you are as a person. Figure out what you want and don't want.

 

Ask yourself why you allowed this to happen. Why did you get involved with two attached guys, and allow yourself to get pregnant by them? Do you not feel you deserve a guy who isn't already in a relationship and who only has eyes for you? Does it boost your self esteem to think they'll cheat with you? Are you hurting yourself because you somehow feel you deserve it?

 

(b) stop having affairs and take responsibility for your choices. This didn't just happen to you. You consciously worked to make it happen. I don't think you're stupid, but having three kids with two brothers ( do I have that right?) doesn't exactly sound like a sensible thing to have done. It was a series of choices on your part that don't make much sense to me. I think you just need to mature a bit more. Five years from now, you're probably going to look back and wonder what the hell you were thinking.

 

Right now, look after yourself and your kids. Be a great mom and make them the focus. The early years go by so fast-trust me on this one; my three are all almost grown, and I miss my little ones sometimes- spend your mental energy on building great memories for your family.

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IMO...you seem to be the epitome of "affairs are a symptom of a bigger problem"...you have to face that your issues are yourself & not men. Not just for you but your children's sake, you're going to have to get to the bottom of what your internal issues are, emotionally healthy people don't sleep with brothers & have kids thinking that's going to keep a man.

 

If I were you, I'd get into therapy immediately & whole heartedly try & fix what's broken...you can only fix a life issue, when you step back for a moment & really do some soul searching. Your babies need a healthy mother. Good luck

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Two things that might help you

 

( a) stay away from guys, at least for now. It sounds like your "man picker" is pretty messed up. Take some time with your kids, watch them grow and grow yourself. Learn more about yourself and who you are as a person. Figure out what you want and don't want.

 

Ask yourself why you allowed this to happen. Why did you get involved with two attached guys, and allow yourself to get pregnant by them? Do you not feel you deserve a guy who isn't already in a relationship and who only has eyes for you? Does it boost your self esteem to think they'll cheat with you? Are you hurting yourself because you somehow feel you deserve it?

 

(b) stop having affairs and take responsibility for your choices. This didn't just happen to you. You consciously worked to make it happen. I don't think you're stupid, but having three kids with two brothers ( do I have that right?) doesn't exactly sound like a sensible thing to have done. It was a series of choices on your part that don't make much sense to me. I think you just need to mature a bit more. Five years from now, you're probably going to look back and wonder what the hell you were thinking.

 

Right now, look after yourself and your kids. Be a great mom and make them the focus. The early years go by so fast-trust me on this one; my three are all almost grown, and I miss my little ones sometimes- spend your mental energy on building great memories for your family.

 

 

selfish but he wanted a baby and i wanted more kids the 2nd guy did,

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